This is how Barbie is taking over the planet.

I always knew something was wrong with Barbie, but did they listen? NO! Now, they're dying every second. Just goes to show what happens when ya don't listen to your friendly neighborhood Mangai

The number of deaths in unnaturally low.

Want me to raise it for you?

Barbies are turning people into Barbies.

Duh.

Mattel is an evil toy corporation that steals peoples souls and puts them in barbies on a mass-produced scale. This kind of thing must stop!

That's why I buy LEGO instead.

BARBIES WITH CAMERAS ARE SPIES FROM THE FBI

that is all.

If people were naughty, they are reincarnated as a Barbie doll.

...WAIT.

Oh, you guys. It's perfectly logical.

What happens if the "Barbies sold per second" average hits three dolls per second?

These...dolls...are an abomination! They must be destroyed. [/starcraftIIripoff]

Neya Out.

I can't believe none of you have hit the truth here.

This is obviously what happens:

1. A younger sister buys a Barbie doll.

2. She begins annoying her older brother with it.

3. He becomes so repulsed by the Barbie doll's 'girly-ness' that he has a heart attack.

Never doubt the un-scientific method.