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JAG18

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Blog Entries posted by JAG18

  1. JAG18
    A few days ago, I finished reading "Beowulf", while I was reading I kept anticipating specific cool moments I've heard of over the years; like when Beowulf pulls Grendel's arm out of it's socket like a wookiee, but one moment I was really waiting for was when Beowulf kills the Frankish standard bearer.
     
    Now, here is how Tom Shippey described the moment, in the special features for "The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug",
     
    ...and here is how Marc Hudson put it in the "Wordsworth Classics of World Literature" edition I read,
    (lines 2505-2508)
     
    Maybe a slight difference to some, but clearly not as exciting or epic IMO; no offense to Hudson and his publisher, but now I think I really should have read whatever translation Shippey is quoting.
     
     
    Anyway, I now need to find something new to read.
  2. JAG18
    In America, you scare your daughter's boyfriend:
     
    Man throws bullet at daughter's boyfriend,
     
    "It gets a lot faster after 10 pm."
     
    In Soviet Russia, your daughter's boyfriend scares you!
     
    FPSrussia drives up to girlfriend's house in T-14 Armata tank and emerges from turret draped in machine gun belts,
     
    "I'll bring her home when I feel like it."
     
     
     
    Thank you, I'm here all week.
  3. JAG18
    So, last month after "Green Book" won Best Picture at the Academy Awards I was made aware, through headlines like, "Green Book worst best picture since Gladiator", of the fact that people don't like Ridley Scott's "Gladiator".
     
    Now, my first reaction to this news, of course, was, "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!" Which, despite Zoey Deutch saying it in "Vampire Academy" (one of the most cringe worthy moments in any movie from the last 20-ish years) is one of the best lines in cinema of all time.
     
    After that, I did some looking to see what movies "Gladiator" was competing against and found that "Cast Away" is probably my next favorite film from 2000 although I can't say whether I like it more than "Gladiator". When I told my sister about this, her response was something to the effect of, "So it's 'are you not entertained," vs. "Wilson"?"
     
    That made me wonder, "What if movies were as good as the memes they inspired?" Then the Star Wars prequels would all be masterpieces! "Taken" would be worth watching more than once; "The Dark Knight Rises" might actually be better than "The Dark Knight".
     
    I could sit here and think of some more, but I'll let anyone in the comments work out the implications of living in such a world.
  4. JAG18

    BZPower
    Nine years ago I joined BZPower.  This site wasn't even nine years old when I discovered it. 
    I still have fond memories of those early years.  Traffic had already declined by then, but it was still an active place (certainly much better than it is today).  Most of the people I talked to back then have since moved on (although it's not like I'm around here much either). 
    What spinner am I getting?  A hau, the kind Tahu Stars wore.  I have that set somewhere. 
    OK, I don't have anything profound or substantial to say, but I wanted to mark the occasion. 
  5. JAG18

    AMA
    It's been almost five years since I did one of these and the last time I did one I opened it with a cringey joke.  Either way, I want to post here (before my ten year anniversary next month) and this is all I could come up with so ask away.  
    Or don't, it's a free website. 
    But I hope you do because it's kind of the point.
     
  6. JAG18
    I don't know how anyone would know this, but I adore and collect stuffed animals and have for as long as I can remember.

    Might as well start with the OGs.  Left-to-right: Gram Paul "Uncle Grandpa" Penguin, everyone's favorite old man who's gotten up in years and now needs a wheelchair.   His son Fat Penguin (named long ago in a different time and place) who's probably the favorite animal I own.  He's got a wife and five kids, but we don't need to talk about them right now.  Glacier the walking ticking time bomb who likes to throw is little brother.  Said little brother Iceberg who's a kleptomaniac and who only has one foot, but everyone swears he lost before his brother threw him.  And finally their Italian cousin Gelato who's catchphrase is, "You guys are mean!"  He gets to say it a lot around this lot.

    A small sample of all my bears, the largest species in my collection.  Rapid fire family left-to-right:
    Germania Kirk: got his name from when me and my sister played "Star Trek", but afterwards we couldn't stop calling him Kirk.  Is a preacher and married to...
    Maple: The Canadian bear.
    Dimples: their son who was the first bear baby in the world and is now a doctor.  Everyone used to call him baby boy because he was the first.
    Erin Erwin: the Irish ice cream man.
    Millennium: Erin's wife and the undisputed best chef in the land.
    Nikki: their daughter and now married to Dimples, hence...
    Baby Boy: Dimples and Nikki's son who has his dad's old nickname.  His catchphrase is "Ta da", which he is also sometimes called.
    Not shown are the two Erwin family boys, Cuddly and Winnie.  They moved away awhile ago and are living their best single life with their friend Curly.
    Spangle and Brittany: I think I forgot their last name.  Spangle used to be a superhero (Spangle Boy!), but now I think he just sits in his pajamas all day.
    Caramel: their third kid and former cheerleader.  Somehow fell in life with...
    Sweeter: a gingerbread man and baker who can never match Millennium.
    Lindy "Lucky Lindy": their daughter who's actually a clone of her mother because you know bears and cookies can't.  Anyway, she's a bit of a trouble maker.

    For whatever reason, most of my and my sisters' stuffed animal collections consisted of bears and penguin to the point that are few other animals were given the kind of offensive term "nonie" (NON-ee).  Either way, the nonies' lot has improved over the years and Punxsutawney Phil has been the mayor for eight years or more.  His chief advisor is his cousin Phil (the one without the hat) and together they wisely govern the town's treasury (the chests).  The big monkey is their bodyguard Lazlo Khan and his little monkey son Bongo.  The hedgehog is Lothario (that means "the lover") advisor/jester.  The green thing is a recent gift from my sister that I don't know what to do with so I let him hang in the executive suite. 
    Also, Meltdown isn't there to hold the flag for them or anything he's just also on my desk and photobombed them.

    More recent additions now that I love referencing things.  Left-to-right (back row), Pabu the red panda, Greywind the dire wolf, Bosco the black bear, Gojira the spinosaurus, and 51 the alien.  (Front row) Bruce the shark, Lottie the axolotl and her son Verde. 
    I've just realized that my love for writing might have started with the stories and backgrounds I created around all these animals.  Either way, this is a small sample of my collection, I probably have a hundred more, but what I really want to do is create some kind of archive of all of them with their names and histories to make sure I'll never forget.  Will I find time?  No idea, but this is a start I guess.
    -JAG
     
  7. JAG18
    I’ve done this a couple of times here before (although I didn’t mean for 6 months to pass before doing another one of these, oops) so I won’t explain it again.  You can see my past two here:
    Back To The Future
    If Life Were A Movie
    And I’ll be using my playlist of music from 2017 (557 songs) for this one; share yours below if you want to.
     
     
    The Future:
    1. What is my life’s philosophy?
    “Fine” – Tayler Buono (not good or bad, just fine)
     
     
    2. What will my last words be?
    “Ground Control” – All Time Low; Tegan and Sara (So my death’s gonna be plane related?  Ominous)
     
     
    3. How am I Feeling today?
    “Want You Back” – HAIM (ha, ha, NO)
     
     
    4. What is my Theme song?
    “Totalizer” – Charly Bliss (uh…*checks Genius* alright, next)
     
     
    5. What song will be played at my wedding?
    “Give Me Your Word” – Bella Goldwin (I’ll take it)
     
     
    6. What song will be played at my funeral?
    “Life Goes On” – Bailey Bryan (well, not my life, but good advice anyway)
     
     
    7. How will I be remembered?
    “Just A Crush” – Grace Vanderwal (whoa)
     
     
    8. What is some good advice for me?
    “Big Girls Cry” – Mimoza (wrong gender, but sure)
     
     
    9. What’s my life’s dream?
    “Empty” – Olivia O’Brien (what?)
     
     
    10. What’s my kind of lady/man?
    “Something To Tell You” – HAIM (no comment)
     
     
    11. How do people see me?
    “High Enough” – K.Flay (um, OK, next)
     
     
    12. How would I describe this page?
    “Bleachers” – Jillian Jacqueline (another what?)
     
     
    13. How would I describe my best friend?
    “Bloom” – Marnie (uh, ok)
     
     
    14. What’s in store for this week?
    “No Love” – Olivia O’Brien (OUCH)
     
     
    15. How would I describe my parents?
    “Sleep” – Timothy Heller (ha)
     
     
    16. If I had one wish, what would I wish for?
    “Too Many Love Songs” – Maggie Rose (probably not)
     
     
    17. What do my friends think of me?
    “(Not) The One” – Bebe Rexha (I think that’s a good thing?)
     
     
    18. What is said about me behind my back?
    “Oh Love” – MisterWives (no comment)
     
     
    19. What do I think of this questionnaire?
    “Fly high” – DREAMCATCHER (cool story)
     
     
    Favorites: 2, 6, 11, 14
     
    -JAG
  8. JAG18
    Although I did consider calling this entry "The Slender Man of Bionicle" I think Blaze from Mortal Kombat is a better fit here, but if anyone thinks they know what the character I'm looking for is then go right ahead and tell me in the comments.
     
    So, this is a promo picture of Iconox as seen on Strakk's canister:

     
    If you know me you know I had the closer Glatorian in the foreground (who I've dubbed "Snow N. Ice Oakenshield") as my avatar for years and considered it my calling card. In fact, I have a whole block dedicated to this guy in my blog here.
     
    I wish I could say that I came up with this idea all by myself, but I remember seeing someone with this image as a banner back in '09, although I don't think I remember seeing anyone use it as an avatar. I don't now why I was drawn to Mr. Oakenshield, but when I become a member and was trying to think of a cool avatar I thought back to that banner I saw once and the rest is history.
     
    Now, here are the instructions that came with Malum:

     
    Yep, nothing out of the ordinary. Wait, what's that in the background? Let's zoom in a little.

     
    I found this today while looking for images for the Bionicle Caption Contest. Now, these instructions are from 2009 and this image was uploaded in 2016, but I've never ever seen this guy before in my entire life...If I wasn't so attached to my coat of arms, I'd considered making this guy my new avatar both as a throwback to my old avatar and because I think he also looks pretty cool.
     
    And that is all. I hope I was the first one to point this guy out to you and that now your life is a bit better for having spotted him. Now excuse me while I try and think up a way to honor these guys probably either in moc form or in a short story where these guys fought each other in the Core War or something.
  9. JAG18
    Or considering the activity around here maybe I should call it an "Ask me nothing." Imma rite?
     
    Anyway, my premier membership is almost up so I thought I should do at least one of these in my time on BZPower before it finally runs out.
     
    So go ahead and ask me any questions you might have in the comments and I'll answer them when I can.
  10. JAG18
    Today, I got the box containing all my BIONICLE sets down from the top of the closet for the first time in probably a couple of years or so.  Giant nostalgia blast.  I decided to take a picture to commemorate the moment, but to make it funnier I posed them all duking it out in a huge side-less battle. 

    Can you spot everything wrong with this picture? 
     
  11. JAG18
    And not just in terms of everything except choreography.
     

     

     
     
    [Yes I've known about these videos for some time (and I've also seen the video where Obi-Wan Force Speeds straight into the power generator pit), I'm just posting them as food for thought, and no I don't mind if you like this fight or the movie it's from.]
  12. JAG18
    Last week(ish), I finished watching the entire first season of one of my favorite TV shows "The Twilight Zone".
     
    So, for as long as I can remember I've always enjoyed Sci-fi's "Twilight Zone" marathons, but despite always considering it a favorite show of mine I've never actually had any exposure to the show outside of the marathons. Well, recently I decided to change that and so I borrowed the first season from my local library and went to watching.
     
    I'm not going to ramble on here about my favorite episodes or any observations I've had while watching, but I will say that very quickly the episodes became very predictable with only the finale's twist ending making me grab my head while shouting, "OH MY GAWD."
    I don't know if this is because I have a lot of experience with the show or if the episodes really are just that predictable or what, but either way it didn't really matter because the writing and Rod Serling's insights into human nature still kept me interested, but its just something that stuck out to me.
     
     
    Favorite Episode(s); "The Monsters are Due on Maple Street", "Judgment Night", and "One For the Angels".
     
    Alright, now on to season 2.
  13. JAG18
    Yeah, I just realized the other week that I don't have a signature below my posts; I'm sure I had a good reason for doing that, but still I...wait. Did I put a "C" instead of an "S" in the title? Oh well, might as well just roll with it.
     
    So, I did some browsing around the forums and noticed that, for one, a surprising number of people don't have a sig at all, but also that everything in sigs fell into a few categories: links, quotes, and occasionally a moc image or banner. And when I think back to what my sig has looked like over the years I realized that has used fallen into the same categories. First it was nothing, but links (there was a lot of stuff I wanted to link to back in the day!) then I got a banner with a model in it, heck I know I've even put silly quotes in my sig before.
    I'm pretty sure the last links I had right before I got rid of it were of this blog, my wordpress blog that I abandoned, the caption contest, and I think that's it.
     
    I'm open to any and all ideas as to what I should put down there; my only ideas right now are...you guessed it links (this blog, my flickr) or maybe a banner featuring the three most beautiful women alive (assuming I feel like putting in the work necessary). Or I could just get with the times and leave it empty.
     
    Any thoughts?
  14. JAG18

    Writing
    Happy Law Bringer Day!  Admittedly, I've never celebrated it before today, but you know every tradition has to start somewhere.  
    Today marks the six year anniversary of when (after several mouths of brainstorming and nearly three years of not writing any fiction) I started writing the first story in what would become "Law Bringer".  I thought about honoring the occasion by posting a teaser or snippet of an actual story, but instead I decided to write about my writing.   
    Recently, I collected the info below by pouring through my old word documents and obviously this isn't one-hundred percent accurate either because of poor record keeping or stories lost to computer crashes, but it should give you a good idea of my writing output over the years.  
    Words written per year:
    2004-07: less than 1,000 words
    2008-10: 14,000 words
    2011: 11,000 words
    2012-13: 6,000 words
    2016-17: 2,200 words
    2018-21: 1000 words
    I don't know why I started writing I just did, although, I should point out that of the 35,000 words I wrote from 2004-2021 all I have to show for it is:
    2 short stories (including a Hero Factory story I posted here)
    A lot of flash fiction most of which is either BIONICLE or Hero Factory fan fiction or not very good (or both).
    For some reason during this time period my go-to writing format was like the appendices from LOTR even before I knew what those were.  No idea why.  
     
    Something else I want to mention; I rarely finished most of my work from this time.  This is definitely something I've improved this year because now I can actually write a short story from beginning to end.  The idea popped into my head to try and finish some of my old stuff, but after actually reading some of it I figure most of it is best left where it is.  
    This trip down memory lane confirms the narrative I've always assumed that writing was something I did in junior high up to the summer after my freshman year, but in my sophomore year I stopped and no matter how hard I tried or wanted to I just couldn't write fiction again.  I kept writing notes and world building, but another piece of prose never came.  I cannot explain why.    
    Bringing this back to "Law Bringer", like I said I wrote the first bits of the story in late 2016 and early 2017, but then the block returned.  I spent a long time working on my world building on-and-off until 2019/2020 when I got really serious about it and by this point I really wanted to make an attempt to write again hence my little bits of writing during this time period.  
    Then last November I started watching videos about writing on Youtube.  Before this, everything I knew about writing I learned from BZPower or what writers have said so just random sources.  I don't think that's the only thing I needed, but I'm sure it helped and on Christmas Eve of 2021 I began to write and write, then run out of steam in the spring, but picked it back up in May and eventually managed to create some good writing habits.  
    The long and short of it is this past year I've written 105,000 words resulting in:  
    22 short stories (18 "Law Bringer" 4 non-"Law Bringer")
    A fourth of a novel
    Half of a novella
    2 pieces of flash fiction (both much better than anything I wrote several years ago)
    You know, after writing this out, I think December 24th sounds like a better date for Law Bringer Day, but since no one would celebrate it then because of conflicts with other holidays, I think I'll stick to November 30th. 
    That's the story I wanted to tell and also why I'm optimistic about the future of my writing and "Law Bringer" and I'm hopeful I'll be able to share more of both with the world soon.
     
  15. JAG18
    This is something I've enjoyed doing for years since I first got it from this ten year old blog entry; basically, you take a list of questions, set your Ipod (or any Spotify/Apple playlist) on shuffle and answer each question with whatever song you get.  The songs usually make no sense as answers, but it has always been a fun past time.  I have a word document that I've been filling with these since 2012, but the last one I did was apparently in 2017 so here's one I did a couple of nights ago (using my best songs of 2018 playlist).  Give it a try if you want. 
    Back To The Future:
     
    I. What will I dream about tonight?
    “Outlaws” – Au/Ra (ooh, sounds risky and dangerous and fun)
     
     
    II. What song best describes my love life?
    “The Medicine Does Not Control Me” – EURINGER featuring Grimes (I don’t like the sound of that.)
     
     
    III. What is my life’s ambition?
    “Loveless” – Lila Gold (Um, mission accomplished?  I think.)
     
     
    IV. Who is my greatest hero?
    “Deliverance” – CHVRCHES (Deliverance does sound like a cool fantasy character name…)
     
     
    V. What do I want right now?
    “I Love My Boyfriend” – Princess Chelsea (Well, it almost works because we’ve already covered my love life, but…)
     
     
    VI. What is my dream job?
    “Side Effects” – The Chainsmokers; Emily Warren (My dream job is a side effect?)
     
     
    VII. Where does my future best friend live?
    “no tears left to cry” – Ariana Grande (Uh?)
     
     
    VIII. What song fits me the best?
    “Sweet but Psycho” – Ava Max (This made me laugh, but I’m still a little offended.)
     
     
    IX. What is the real answer to life, the universe, and everything?
    “Focus” – Allie X (Did you just finish watching “Priest”?)
     
     
    X. What should I definitely not eat?
    “High Horse” – Kacey Musgraves (No comment)
     
     
    XI. How will I die?
    “Third Eye” – Emma Blackery (This either has something to do with that Martian episode in the original “Twilight Zone” or Combustion Man from “Avatar” either way not good). 
     
     
    XII. What will people say at my funeral?
    “CEASE AND DESIST” – Alice Glass (I like it).
     
     
    XIII. How will my grandchildren feel about me?
    “Girl of the Year” – Allie X (Kids these days).
     
     
    XIV. Who loves me right now?
    “Over My Head” – Echosmith (I had to resist the urge to look up).
     
     
    XV. What is my true identity?
    “Heartbroken” – Fickle Friends (Ok, I wasn’t sure before, but now I know this list is trying to hurt my feelings). 
     
     
    XVI. Who or what is my greatest foe?
    “This Time Around” – Jaira Burns (In the context of the song, that almost makes sense). 
     
     
    XVII. Aliens just teleported me out of my computer chair in a swirl of blue sparkles what happens next!?
    “Mulholland” – Sizzy Rocket (That teleported me to a highway?  Alright then.)
     
     
    XVIII. Any last words?
    “Everybody Wants To Be Famous” – Superorganism (I’ll take it.)
     
    Favorites: 5, 8, 12
  16. JAG18
    It's cold. 
    In all seriousness, yeah the past few days have been hard.  My family lost power early Monday morning and we just got it back this morning.  It was a challenge, especially staying (sort of) warm and we're not out of it left (I need to keep this short 'cause we still need to conserve whatever power we can).  My last few days consisted of reading by day light, listening to music at night (had to save battery life), and whatever me and my sister could do to stay somewhat entertained.  I tried my best to be grateful during the whole experience for whatever I could and I'm so grateful now that the power's back. 
    OK, I need to get going, please send any prayers and good wishes this way, both for me and my family and for the other people here who had it worse and still have it worse than us; they're very appreciated.
    One last thing, you know what music gave me the most comfort through this?  Digital Pacific, the new album from Luna Shadows, which I thankfully bought when it dropped last Friday.  It's been one great bright spot in an otherwise dark (literal and figurative) time. 
     
     
  17. JAG18
    Today is my three year anniversary on BZPower; feels more like two. I wonder if I should try and be more active around here or something...
     
     
    That is all, now continue with whatever you were doing.
  18. JAG18
    Yep, today is my five year anniversary on BZPower. Not as impressive as it used to be either when I first joined or when I was a lurker, but whatever.
     
    This has gotten me thinking a bit, about how much my life has changed since I first joined and if you read through my profile feed (please don't) you can see me chronicling some of those changes. Me being me, I'm most interested in how much my music hobby has changed since then; back when I first joined my primary means of music consumption were youtube and radio, which just strikes me as kind of funny now. And that's not even mention how much my music taste have changed since then.
     
    But mostly my anniversary has gotten me thinking about what the site was like back then; all the members I used to hang out with (most of whom have left the site or hardly visit), the sub-forums I used to be super active in like S&T (where discussion has almost completely died). I remember how I used to post in almost every topic made in BBC, including every entry for that BBCC about video games. I remember that time I tried to join an RPG, how I used to be as active in the CoT games as the G&T ones (not sure why I stopped though), playing Mafia and always being the villager, hosting Hitman. It's all coming back to me.
     
    Well, times changed, people grow old, and all good things come to end. Even though you'd think that all BZPower is now to me is a place for nostalgia, I actually am thinking a lot about my future on this place. For some weird reason I just now started my career as a mocist and ain't done yet; plus I still have some ambition to host one more game of Bionicle RISK if I can get enough players. In the mean time I still plan to keep the caption contest going (by the way, is that the most active topic on the site now or am I just being delusional?)
     
    Alright, that's all I got, now I'm going to use my new Olmak to transport myself to some random pocket dimension or something.
  19. JAG18
    Alternate Title: The Tommy Westphall of Sci-Fi
    Alternate Title #2: Take It Off Predey Boy!
     
    A while ago I was watching the kill count video for "Alien Vs. Predator" and after doing some reading on the AVP wiki I got the idea for this entry, but decided to wait until I had watched all the AVP movies at least once. That meant had 5 or 6 movies to watch; well, last Monday I watched "Alien vs. Predator: Requiem" so here we are.
     
    Note: I will not be spoiling any movies worth seeing, but if for some reason you want to watch all the AVP movies then in that case spoilers below for "The Predator" (2018), "Alien Vs. Predator", "Alien Vs Predator: Requiem", "Alien 3", "Alien: Resurrection", and "Alien: Covenant". Although honestly, if you haven't seen most of these movies then this won't make any sense.
     
    Main Movies:
     
    "Predator" (1987) - 1987
    Bunch of muscular special forces dudes in the jungles sprout off action one liners while being hunted something that ain't no man.
     
    Predator 2 - 1990
    The Predator moves to the city and some weird stuff goes down; stuff a BZP Lovers organization would rather not anyone know about. Please note, Aliens and Predators had already crossed over before a Xenomorph skull appeared in this movie.
     
    AVP and AVP Requiem - 2004
    The CEO of a company called Weyland enterprises, Charles Bishop Weyland, leads a team to Antarctica to investigate some strange happenings and get caught in the hunt of three Predator young bloods (Celtic, Chopper, and Scar). In flashbacks, we learn that the Predators taught humans how to build pyramids and used them as hosts for the ultimate sport, xenomorphs. After the battle, an alien/predator (Predalien) hybrid bursts out of the chest of the last surviving Predator of the last film (Scar) causing the ship to crash in a small town on earth. Another Predator (Wolf) now has to go to Earth and preform one of the worst cover ups in history and this three way war ends with the secret government agency nuking a Colorado town. Ms. Yutani appears in the last scene.
     
    Predators - 2010
    A bunch of killers and warriors get kidnapped and dropped on a Predator game preserve. Doesn't establish anything new except maybe that they're super Predators, but whatever just get to the choppa.
     
    The Predator - 2018
    So many stupid things happen, but the stupidest might be the "revelation" that Predators hunt in order to collect the DNA of the best warriors as opposed to, you know, cause of the fact that they're sport hunters. Also, this is why Predators have an obsession with ripping people's spines out (what's Sub-Zero's excuse?) Also that BZP Lovers organization is back with the actually props from all the previous movies. Finally, the humans get a secret weapon--an Iron Man suit, which might help explain...
     
    Blade Runner - 2019
    Yes, tenuous evidence suggests that "Blade Runner" and "Alien" share the same universe; the only important thing established is that androids exist although they're not on the best terms with humans right now. Also, this creates the biggest plot in this whole thing, which is trying to explain the biggest tech jump in all of human history.
     
    Soldier and Blade Runner 2049 - 2036 and when the heck do you think?
    These both exist in this timeline, but I don't have anything to say about them because I haven't seen either so we are leaving.
     
    Promethes - 2092
    First, I'll say up front that I think this never should have been an alien movie, but that being said this does give us a lot of back story.
    In flashbacks we see a new Weyland was running the company in the early 2000s (probably the son of Bishop Weylind who died in AVP) and we learn that another race of aliens The Engineers created humans (and maybe Predators and Xenomorphs?) And fun fact, Elien Ripley was 1 year old during the event of this film.
     
    Alien: Covenant: 2104
    Um, android David recreated Xenomorphs (but we are trying to keep things consistent, then Engineers, Predators, and David all re-created the Xenomorphs from the same black goo) and before this movie he used The Engineer's ship to destroy a world of aliens created by The Engineers. I want to say that Ridley Scott will fix the timeline with the next Alien prequel, but if this movie is anything to go off of then probably it will only mess the timeline up more and suck at the same time.
     
    Alien: 2122
    A bunch of space truckers find an old Engineer ship with a xenomorph on it.
     
    Aliens: 2179
    Ripley and a team of Colonial Marines fight xenomorphs and Bishop shows how far androids have come since "Blade Runner".
     
    Alien 3: 2179
    You know, Ripley killing the last of the aliens isn't all that important if it's true that xenomorphs exist elsewhere in the universe. Also, we meet a scientist named Bishop who, no joke, is theorized to just look a lot like the Weyland from AVP; yeah assuming this guy is who he says he is.
     
    Alien: Resurrection - 2379 (ish)
    I can't believe that in the two centuries that have pasted since the last film that humanity hasn't found any xenomorphs on other planets OR the Predators. But this is the end of the timeline so that's that.
     
    Here's the whole thing in
    (make sure to watch that video on 1.25 speed; trust me you'll need it).  
    But we're not done yet.
     
    Crazy Comic Crossovers:
    Batman vs Predator: see
    for an epic animated version of this comic in which Batman defeats a Predator with his greatest gadget...the bat. Yep, Batman beats up an alien with a wooden baseball bat. This combined with "Batman vs. Aliens", "Superman vs. Aliens" and "Superman vs. Predator" (and others) means the DC universe is connected to the AVPverse (somehow).  
    Judge Dredd vs. Alien: Incubus: see
    for how awesome this story actually is. Also, since multidimensional travel is a thing in 2000 A.D. this means that most of these shared universe can be explained as taking place in different dimensions that the Predators and Aliens keep stumbling into.  
    Archie vs. Predator: Yep this is a thing and since "Archie vs. The Punisher" is also a thing that means that technically the DC and Marvel universes are connected.
     
    Alien vs. Predator vs. Terminator: alright I'm done (although this is obviously non-canon). This comic does include a hilarious bit where the writers try and sell the idea that Dutch was the inspiration for the Terminators.
     
    See here for even more crazy comic crossovers.
     
    Mortal Kombat:
    So, Jason Voorhees, Alien, Predator, Freddy, Kratos have all been guest characters in MK over the years, but I'll yet you figure out the implications of that. Plus, don't forget the DC universe crossover. Mortal Kombat (like Dredd) can make sense of all these connected universe using the idea of realms, but that is probably unnecessary because...
     
    In Conclusion: A Few Take Aways
    1) I think Warner Bros and Dark Horses may have too many licenses on their hands.
     
    2) I don't (and would encourage everyone) not to take all this too seriously. Like the Tommy Westphall theory, this all shows how ridiculous it is to assume that universes are connected just because of one guest appearance. Heck, it's an argument against making overly connected universes in general. But, whats more...
     
    3) Making good art is more important than canon.
    Crossovers can be fun (and like some of the above realy good), but valuing canon over art can sometime be really dumb. Ultimately, Disney did the right thing with the Star Wars EU.
     
    And I think that's all that needs to be said about that. I hope you learned something important from this or at least got a good laugh out of some of those hilarious attempts to maintain continuity.
  20. JAG18
    [

    Apparently, this was the idea for Jurassic Park IV as envisioned in a script written by John Sayles, years before Jurassic World was a thing.
     
    Now, despite being someone who rolls their eyes every time someone in the "Jurassic World" movies brings up the idea that dinosaurs have any military value what so ever I just love the idea of a scene where an Ankylosaurus is sitting inside the hold of a C-130 Hercules, the door opens and an army guy shouts, "GO, GO GO, GO!" Prompting the dinosaur to jump out the aircraft and three big ol' parachutes deploy causing it to fall safely to earth.
     
    And don't forget the priceless reactions of the poor guys on the ground looking up as an eight ton dinosaur gets dropped on their heads.
     
    I just thought everyone's life would better with that imagery in their brains.
  21. JAG18

    Real Life
    (Some lyrics aren't safe for BZP, so instead of a youtube video here's the album art instead.)
    I'm too sad to cry, too high to get up
    Don't even try ’cause I'm scared to mess up
    Don't like to talk, I just lay in my bed
    Don't even try to go out with my friends
    Lied to my doctor, she knew I was fakin'
    Gave me some pills, but I'm too scared to take 'em
    I try and I try, but I'm too sad to cry
     
  22. JAG18

    Board Games
    Well yes, but actually no. 

    Technically, I made a "living card game" not a trading card game and (since I'm just playing testing right now) I'm using images from a variety of things I like.  I've made about 110 cards so far and above are the ones I've made based on things from BIONICLE.
    Right now I'm trying to figure it out how to put the game on screentop.gg so I can play with people online and then I might try and figure out how to do the same on tabletop simulator.
    The original inspiration for the game was Richard Garfield's original idea for "Magic The Gathering", a game you could play while standing in line for something.  So, that's the main selling point of my game, you "could" play it standing up, but I know if anyone really would want to.  My main design goals have been making a simple trading card game and one that improves on the things I don't like in several other games I play.
    Alright, that's all I'm going to write here.   Make of this what you will. 
     
  23. JAG18
    A couple of days ago I turned 20 and one of my gifts was a board game called "Risk: Star Wars Edition".
     
    Now, any serious board gamer (full disclosure: I'm not because I'm new to the hobby and frankly don't have the funds to get into) Risk is at the end of the day not a very good game or at best their are a lot of game that does what Risk does a lot better, but that doesn't matter because this game has absolutely nothing to do with Risk. Instead, this a spiritual successor of an older and exceptional Star Wars game that came out in 1999 called The Queen's Gambit and both were designed in part by Craig Van Ness who worked on my favorite board game of all time "Star Wars: Epic Duels".
     
    Anyway, Risk: Star Wars Edition is a fun game, very reminiscent of a Commands and Colors game only Star Wars themed (come to think of it, that actually sounds like a great idea) and while there isn't much deep strategy involved in this game who cares because its just a lot of fun moving ships around and chucking dice. I did encounter the same problem that most people who bought this game did; that the Rebels win almost 90% of the time, but fortunately I was able to find a rule clarification sheet online that, in my experience, balances the game out by pointing out some rules that really help the Empire.
     
    Star Wars: The Emperor's Gambit is a great game that's strangely, also a mass market game; I like it a lot and will probably play it again as soon as I can.
  24. JAG18
    Over the last week or so, I've been rereading all 49 of the old Bionicle comics for the first time in years. Here are my (completely random) thoughts on them.
     
    2001:
    -Why exactly were the Turaga telling the Bionicle Tale at the beginning of Comic #2? I know it's some kind of tribal thing to tell myths and legends over and over to preserve them, but they weren't any Matoran around so were the Turaga just telling it so they wouldn't forget?
    -I never realized how diverse, and honestly sometimes odd, promotions were in 2001; having a contest to meet some skater is probably the strangest (to me).
    -The last of this year has the Toa finding ways to beat random Rahi without physically hitting them and thereby violate LEGO's no violence policy; it ends with the heroes striking poses and leaving us to play MNOG to see how the story ends.
     
    2002:
    -Six issues allowed for the room to tell a more in-depth story and cooler year overall making '02 my favorite year of the original three.
    -LEWA WHY CAN'T YOU GO TWO SECONDS WITHOUT LOSING YOUR MASK!
    -It's kind of a shame that so often in BIONICLE so many sets were shoehorned into the story for just a few seconds of screen-time in which they don't really do anything. The Exo-Toa are good example of this (but I guess the whole point of the comics and entire story was just to sell all these sets so it's fine.
     
    2003:
    -Bohrok-Kal filler is fill-y.
    -I find it hilarious how the so many BIONICLE fans over the years kept asking Greg about what must have been something he did without a second thought at the time (sending several Tahnok and Lehvak-Kal to space).
    -In Comic 14, Kopaka stood his ground against all the Rahkshi LIKE A BOSS.
     
    2004:
    -Another great year for story with the first half involving the Toa pruning weeds and second half running away from Vahki
    -I find it funny how much time and effort was spent giving the Vahki different powers and tactics only for them to be more or less completely forgotten in later years.
     
    2005:
    -Seeing the Toa Hahga (well, two of them anyway) in action in Comic 25 still makes it one of my favorite comics of all time.
    -The sub-plot involving Nokama and Matau hitching a ride on a Visorak Battering Ram (that Roodaka orders destroyed FOR HAVING A SINGLE CRACK) was a lot more fun than I remember.
     
    2006:
    -For some strange reason I don't have "BIONICLE Ignition Comic #0"
    -I knew about BIONICLE at the end of '01, bought the sets, saw "MOL", but I didn't have massive nostalgia rush until I started the '06 comics; the nostalgia value alone will always make 2006 my favorite year in BIONICLE.
    -Anyone remember Free The Band? I wonder what the All American Rejects would say if some fan bought that up with them now.
     
    2007:
    -You know in retrospect, '06 with all the backstabbing and secret alliance of the Piraka made that year feel more like "Game of Thrones" than '07 should have had with the Barraki.
    -Nocturn is one of the best sets and characters of Gen 1, which is why he had to be reincarnated as Skull Slicer in Gen 2.
    -Jaller set Mantax on fire, WHILE THEY WERE BOTH UNDERWATER.
     
    2008:
    -Only four issues is a bit of a let down (yeah I know the first is super long, but still)
    -The Makuta follow inverse ninja-law...for some reason.
    -You know what, Mata Nui never kept his promise and returned to the MU (unless you count when his fist were bashing Makuta in their final fight).
     
    2009:
    -Because of "TLR" whenever I read Mata Nui's voice I hear Michael Dorn's voice.
    -What exactly was the point of having a reboot only to reintroduce Mata Nui halfway through the year?
    -For some stranger reason I only have the small version of Comic 3 that I got with "TLR".
     
    2010:
    -GIANT EPIC ROBOT FIGHT.
    -I have so many fond memories of that day in 2010 when that guy on BZPower was uploading the last comic as fast as he could scan it and I was refreshing the page over and over so I could see the end of BIONICLE, which was so important to me as a kid.
     
     
    One last thought, the only non-BIONICLE comics I've ever read are some Deadpool and Batman comics and also some Spider-Man when I was a lot younger and to be honest, I think the BIONICLE comics actually aren't all that bad compared to them. You know, keeping in mind that the BIONICLE comics were just to promote children's toys (and condense the larger story)...I definitely prefer the artwork throughout all the comics more than the kind found in Deadpool.
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