EmperorWhenua

Speaking of species, Tuck has long given me permission to use the Valkyr species. However, the niche they inhabit this year will be quite different than the one they held in the last couple years. I have yet to formally introduce them as characters in-game, but when I do, it will be awesome.

IC: [Septimus]Septimus' first thoughts on the cannonballs slamming into the marketplace was to run. His second thought was if he could slam the cannonballs away using his Kohlii skils. Then he remembered that a sword probably wasn't strong enough to hold back a cannonball."Should we run?" he asked, turning to face Cersei.

Ic: "Nah," Cersei said with mild excitement of seeing something akin to danger. "As you can see, it already passed."Ooc: Unless it hasn't, in which case you should let me know. xP

Ic: "I'd be happy to have that," Stannis said. "But I'd also like Aurax to stay inside with Hafu. I'm sure having a friend with you would grant more comfort than just having guards as company," he said, directing the last sentence at Hafu. "If you wish, that is."He scooped up some of the water and handed it to his companions, not taking any for himself, though. "The stuffiness can probably be attributed to me," he confessed, dropping a few water droplets onto his arm and showing them sizzle and evaporate. "I can't help it, though, just as I can't drink water for the same reason, but I will keep this short so you don't have to endure my heat much longer."The soldier-adventurer cleared his throat. "Hafu," Stannis began, wishing the guards didn't have to hover around them; he longed for privacy with the carver -- "I think I owe an explanation. I and my troupe, Aurax included, are not just worried about you because of Tamaru's death. It's quite clear that someone means harm to the former members of the Chronicler's Company, but after all these years it seems odd that things have been happening at the rate they are now. My team is dedicated to figuring out what is happening and try to solve the issues we as villagers face, and contend with the mysteries on this island. We have ideas, but they could well be mirages in our imaginations. We need facts. For an example, we found a temple with the face of an unmasked matoran in the desert earlier today, and that fascinated us since we could not enter. But that's it."We need your help just as much as I think you need ours. So please, can you think of anything that might give others a reason to hunt you and your old friends down that can help us with our mission, it would be greatly thanked," Stannis finished, his tone earnest and sincere as it was desperate, and the faces of his allies shared his concerns.

I suppose your entire post can be replied to with a simple comment that there were plenty of things that could have been clarified and remedied grammatically. xP

Epoch of DespairOpening. I really like this. Although the use of "old man" sort of threw me along with "boy" and the like. It's just that I don't really like to describe Matoran like that. Though I do appreciate how you seem to call the two characters here different things each time you mention them while still having us understand who is who.Introduction. So this is a basic story, but very well told. I love how the island is breaking down. Although the Toa must live somewhere or else the island should be mostly gone, At least that's what it seems to me. Or the Toa place their power in objects to keep the island together. This concept and my questioning are definately good and so far I am hooked.

The use of "old man" and "boy" are just used as allegorical expressions to show the vast difference between the matoran villager and the matoran elder. I wasn't actually saying that they were different in ages, though.The island is gradually disintegrating due to the laws of thermodynamics. Because it really is a huge chunk of land, it's rather hard for it to vanish in one go, so that explains why it's rotting away so slowly. As for the toa living there still or not... no comment. But you are partially correct about placing power in objects. The island is rife with mechanisms to keep it functional, and those things are attributed to the toa-gods. The temples scattered across the island, such as the Kini-Toa and the mountain hideout used by the Order of Calix, were built by the gods and serve a purpose the matoran cannot detect, let alone comprehend.

Tl;dr. Anyway. The last sentence is totally awkward. "You must save the island, and finding the toa, unlocking the secrets of the island and changing the course of history forever come along in your journey." What are you trying to say!

Pretty much exactly what I said. The primary goal is to save the island. If you don't save it, everyone dies and there is no point to it. In order to save the island, you have to find the toa. There is the mystery of what happened to the gods, where they went, if they abandoned the island or there is something sinister afoot (hint: there is), etc. Obviously, by figuring out what's happening, the players unlock the secrets of the island. There are a lot of these. The intro subtly establishes the lack of knowledge the inhabitants have on their home, with even the Elders having limits to their knowledge. And it goes without saying that once the above is done, history would have been changed. Any more questions?

Gameplay. Matoran? Sad (Uber powers can not be used. ). Although minor powers are good. Otherwise this seems more like a thinking game to accomplish what we want to do, which is also a plus. Although if no other species can be played at this time and we might unlock toa later, when will we get to play as other species? Will we ever be able to?

Yup, more questions.What other species? None were mentioned, and it can be assumed that the island is the only one in the area. The toa-gods made it far away from other civilizations for specific reasons. So suffice to say, there will be no other species available to play save the first two stages of a matoran life.

Geography. Well, it being an artificial island is a very interesting concept and will provide for some very interesting descriptions. Nice, if a bit strange, map.Po-Wahi. Wouldn't the natural moat be filled with sand eventually? And, "...the river is almost made from this air..." What does that mean?Le-Wahi. "The lucky ones have hits in the giant tree's..." Lol, hits.Onu-Wahi. You use plural caves and caverns and then use "it" to describe the caves and caverns twice. It should be "them".Otherwise the locations are beautiful. They are original (due to the artificialness of the island) and very well described.

So you found all my typos. XD Try these: "Made of thin air," and "huts in the [...] tree."I wanted to explore the possibility of an island not being an island after all, something we were confronted with with Mata Nui being Mata Nui's obscured face more than an actual island. What it all boils down to, however, is that the island is filled with specific things that serve specific purposes, either to support the island infrastructure or maintain an artificial aura, since it is artificial. With that in mind, one must know that nothing in the setting is truly natural save gravity and the other laws of nature. The sand river is an example of this. The moat doesn't fill because it was created that way, and there are failsafes to prevent catastrophes that were not engineered. It's neither a shoo-in or a deus ex, it's just the way it was made to be.

Factions. The Elders. "They are the closest there is to a turaga..."Order of Calix. "...few are as devoted as they and take part in their activities." ?? Ok what? Are you saying others don't take part or that they do?Besides those wording errors, these factions are unique to island and I really like them. Although I do not know which one I would put backing into, since they all seem to be gray at the moment.NPCs. Arrys. "...and some murmur tat since..." Despite not using a proper profile sheet for them, these NPCs are really interesting and I would love to see more of them.

Yes, they're meant to be gray. I hate cut out sides in a conflict. All sides have equal reasons to be greater and maintain influence, and they're all justifiable in their own ways.As for the Order of Calix, imagine them as a highly idealistic and fanatic group who really, really want to save the island and find the toa. The thing is they are superstitious and have very demanding practices, from rituals to temple-hunting and living like monks high in the mountains practicing martial arts. Not exactly the fitting job description for most villagers who fish, hunt, make flax, guard towns or carve statues. While many of the villagers support what the Order of Calix is doing and they have similar faiths as the former priests, they can or don't want to actually give what it takes to be a member of the organization.But there is also a missing word in the sentence, too, so that might explain your confusion.

Matoran Powers. The second sentence should be less awkward, like this, "It is a round disk that possesses a power, granted by the toa-gods, to the matoran who owns it. The power is specific to that matoran." But really this is a great way to give us powers as Matoran. And you make it so there isn't too much of a point to steal them except to stop the user from using them. Although no one knows how to craft a mask from them? No one has figured it out? I'm guessing powers are limited in the profile section.

Why limit them? I'd rather let the imaginations run free. If something is truly too powerful, I'd take notice of it and handle it, but otherwise a simple common sense test would be self-administered by the players.As for the mask issue, I didn't really think it through too much and invented that just to ensure there is no abuse of powers. Let's just say that it's trickier to forge a mask than it seems, and crafting is far from the main export of Ta-Koro in this island setting.

Character Sheet. The Profile is basic, but it works. Although I don't see any limits on the power disk, I'm sure you would just say something is too powerful before approving it. But I do want an example for how powerful a disk can be to base mine off of. No Factions slot?

No factions slot yet. I want the game to be running before factions can be invented, since factions need characters and motives, and there can't be any until the game is running. There is a promise that factions will be accepted later, though. That should be enough.Disks have been answered above.

Rules are rules and these are somewhat funny to me.

But all rules should be reiterated for those who don't know better. Better safe than sorry, etc. Plus, as a gamemaster, having rules helps maintain a standard when it comes to enforcing good RPing in the game itself. It's a necesarry item, and it pains me when an RPG doesn't have any. I don't approve RPGs in COT unless it has rules, either, and neither do any of the other Judges.

Overall I love how simple this appears and yet how complex it can be. This is definately a winning RPG, even with the limited use of only Matoran. Good luck in the contest!

Fwee!

I LOVE YOU MICAHTHIS MAKES ME SO HAPPYHAPPY HAPPY

Oh, hey, that dancing game.

Also, Katuko listed a lot of things that are not powers, but rather simply abilities or things the Rahi has. Like the claws. Otherwise it'd be like looking at a human and saying that you can now use opposable thumbs because "it's a human power."Bull twits. Doesn't work that way. Only true and real powers can be duplicated, not abilities. TPI has a far more accurate list of that.

Ic: "Well then," Stannis said, relaxing a little but remaining relatively tense. He exchanged a content look with Lepidran, who had been silently remaining by his side. "It looks like we're in business. I have two others nearby, too. One has a large hammer; they mean no harm but will remain vigilant from afar."Now, since our ward is quite well awake right now and we seem to have our issues of loyalty straight, I would like to request an audience with the carver," Stannis said, looking at the lead guard and then to the Ruru-wearing one.

Onarax has a blog entry to discuss all of that, GH.

Ic: "Understandable concern, guard," Stannis said. "But I and the members of by team have been handpicked by the turaga and I am to be a trusted man in their books. You can verify my statement with the turaga," he said with a nod.

I play Minecraft.

"And, no, I didn't write cool dude, I wrote cool dude."Made me smile.(Sounds like Le-Wahi is a real cluster of fun right now.)

Ic: "Scattered men are no use when you are dealing with a central and strong opponent," Stannis said, pointing out the error in the protection tactic. "If someone wants to have Hafu dead, they're going to go right for the target. I insist that I and my men assist you, st least for tonight. I insist -- I cannot agree to anything less," he said with a hint of concern. Something in the air wasn't right, as if tonight was the night for an attack. He needed to be there when it happened.

Ewww, Dovs is your co-host, LL? I'm out. I'm out! No second co-host from me.

Ic: Antrim strolled up and down the docks, eyes darting from one person to the next. Nobody could tell, but he was silently judging each one. None of them were demanding his actions, however. Leaving the docks, the baron took to the town center and observed everyone there, too. Merchants passed by, fishermen came and went and guards strolled down the lanes. It was peaceful.But then someone caught Antrim's eye. Sticking out like a sore thumb was a big guy with bulging muscles and a few too many scars on his armor. He seemed casual, but Antrim's suspicions were aroused nonetheless. Deciding he wanted a closer look, he disappeared in the crowd.

Salvinn bumped into someone. "Apologies miss," he then noticed that it was Cersei. "Ah there you are, I was just coming back to the Restaurant, I need my bow." Salvinn held out his hand. "Oh hey Sep, having fun?"

"Yeah," replied the Plasma Matoran. "It's a rather nice place here." He paused for a moment, before his eyes flashed over towards a stall in the marketplace. "Can you guys wait for me? I need to buy something."

Ic: "I suppose so," Cersei said when nobody else seemed to be willing to confirm Septimus' question. "And here's your bow," she said, dropping the tool in Salvinn's hand. "You're lucky I remembered it."

Ic: Senegal walked down the trail to Ga-Koro, armor still dirty and marred by the fights he was in earlier that day, and blood splotches remained in a few places. He had frightened a couple matoran who scampered away when they took not of his appearance, and despite his easy coaxing they ran away. Ga-Matoran were always like that. He sniffed the flowers and admired the scenery a few times at least before he finally appeared at the gate to Ga-Koro.As a poet, he always had a romantic vision of Ga-Koro, the lilypad city representing purity in a sincere sense, and it was a favorite place for him to sit and think. Sometimes he'd not even enter the town itself, instead relaxing on the beaches near it or sitting on one of the many rocks around the area and watch the native wildlife and residents about their lives. This time, however, he strolled past the gate and stepped on the floating pathways.As soon as he got to the deeper waters, he cautiously looked over the edge and slowly dipped into the water, one hand gripping the lilypad even as he submerged he rest of his body. It was cleansing, and the feeling of water slowing through the gaps and crevices in his armor was a welcome one. He opened his eyes and saw the cloud of colors shroud him and fade away, the blood, dirt and sweat rinsed off. As he surfaced again and climbed on the pad, he felt so refreshed and ready to go into the town proper, and quickly went on his way, his footsteps leaving a long trail of water behind him as he dripped dry.

Yeah, that's Crimson Jay. Hardcore veteran, devout friend and godawful co-host. <3

Ic: Stannis was surprised by the guard's approach, and it gave him a reassuring feeling, but it didn't quite make him entirely comfortable. "My name is Stannis," he said, "leader of a crack team of matoran to solve the island's problems. I have reason to think that Hafu is in great danger right now and am ensuring his safety. The fate of all of us may rest in the survival of Hafu and his former companions in the Chronicler's Company. One of them has already been murdered."

Cap has terrible experience with co-hosts. Some of us may recall what happened with him and CJ in The Bridge. Let's hope he doesn't perma-lose Lloyd before he can even enter the race!

That's a bold statement, Lev. http://www.bzpower.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/youngman-sign.gif(I love that emote.)

Ooc: Sorry about the all-OOC post, but I just am bugged by the misuse of elements here. Toa can't telekinetically control their elements unless they have power over kinetics. Toa can create their elements and control how it is made, which is why a Toa of Stone can hammer at someone with a giant fist of stone (Hewkii did this), but as far as playing magic tricks and such with them: no, not really. Plus, I should point that it would take a lot of skill to be able to manipulate elements even remotely to the extent you guys are showing, something which contradicts the laws of the game. "Finding metal" is an example of this in action.Toa of Air control and create wind currents, but that's it: air. Not oxygen, which produces rust from chemical reactions of oxidation; just air. It's like blowing on stuff. You can't corrode an iron bar just by blowing on it, it just won't work.Also, there isn't much in terms of minerals in sand and sandstone, which is what the vast majority of Po-Wahi is made up of. Sand is quartz, no metallic minerals added (there are nonmetallic minerals added, though, but again: nonmetallic).Also, affecting other characters in the game to the extent you guys insinuate isn't cool, which is why my guys have been... well... ignoring everything that's been happening. (Plus, looks like I found Hafu anyway and came first by a longshot, so neener neener neener. )

Ic: Senegal crushed the last opponent, and as predicted, the champion reigned through the contest. As Senegal was accustomed to, the watchers cheered for him and then cheered louder still for their winnings, the few people stupid enough to have bet on the opposition sulking away dejectedly, avoiding the teller that was dispersing the winning bets. Their time may come eventually, but it wasn't today."Nobody died today, eh?" one of the pit managers said when Senegal was sitting behind the stadium, looking over his new scars."Not today," Senegal said, not looking up. "But a few close calls, I think.""Hooah, you bet. That Kav'Den was just creamed. And that other guy, the insolent one...""Draeverian Joskiir.""That one. I think he's just about done for a long while. You were particularly hard on those two.""And why shouldn't I have? They deserved every ounce of weight I gave," Senegal said, finally looking up. "You sit behind a shield and watch as coins flow, but you have never been in the open like I have. You don't understand the pressure I and those with me endure, just for the pleasure of a select few. You yell louder and I punch harder. You act as if I am the one in control of the fights, as if I decide which opponents lose or win, but the truth is it's you and those with you. If someone dies in the arena, their blood is on your hands.""Hey, hey, easy buddy," the manager said, suddenly feeling threatened and rightfully so. Senegal was flaring like a fire toa. "Look, you need rest.""That's what you and yours always say. I need rest, a respite, relaxation, and yet you always call me back for more of this.""Senegal, if you don't want to come back, you don't have to. Take the month off. Be free. Maybe that'll even rile the crowds up and be better for business! This might be beneficial for the two of us.""Always talking about money," Senegal snorted as he got up. "There are higher things that wealth. But I will take our offer.""So long, then!" the manager said, breathing a sigh of relief inside as the champion walked away.Ooc: Senegal off to Ga-Wahi.

Are any other professors unleashing their characters into the game world yet, and if so, where at?