Popular Post Onuki Posted August 20, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted August 20, 2015 (edited) Hakuna Vakama Are you tired of being a Turaga? Worn out from policing ignorant Matoran all day long? Have a fascination with cramped boats? If you answered yes to three or more of the preceding questions, then congratulations, a Hakuna Vakama Cruise may be right for you! With the power of Vakama’s limited edition Kanohi Huna of Invisibility, you can cruise to any of Mata Nui’s two luscious ports, both of which are conveniently located in the charming if backwards commercial district of downtown Ga-Koro. And if you book your trip within the next 48 seconds, Turaga Nokama will graciously throw in an all-insurances paid Tarakava Watch free!* What better way to spend the precious remainder of your summer than making happy memories that no one else knows about while being completely invisible on a tiny boat? Whether you’ve been spending your time chasing wild herds of diseased Mahi or preventing incompetent miners from causing cave-ins or teaching simpleminded Matoran how to avoid swinging into trees, a Hakuna Vakama Cruise has something to offer for everyone! Relax with the joy of invisibility or simply enjoy a break from leading a village of Matoran who don’t understand a word you say! But just what wonderful experiences have our customers had so far? Let’s see what some of our actual cruise passengers have had to say! “It was the best time of my life,” writes completely-unaffiliated Turaga Vakama of Ta-Koro. “The crew accidentally pushed me out of the boat since they couldn’t see me, but that’s to be expected on an invisible cruise,” praises Turaga Whenua of some place underground. “Wait, how many widget-coins am I gift-getting?” ponders Tamaru of Le-Koro. Act now and send your down payment of only 500 widgets to reserve your spot today! The first one callers will receive a definitely unexpired case of Ko-Koro’s best Mount Ihu Rain Spring Water! Hurry, supplies are both unappetizing and limited! So what are you waiting for? Pick up that cowrie shell we’re all pretending is a phone and call now! Join CPR-Certified Captain Kongu and the Hakuna Vakama Cruise Crew for the last ride of your life! *While the crew’s bribed willingness to make such a ridiculously dangerous expedition lasts. Edited October 27, 2015 by -Windrider- 26 Quote The Latest and Fakest in Bionicle News Wanted: Chronicler | Wedding Announced | Bohrok-Kal Miffed | Staring Contest Continues Hakuna Vakama | Rau Convention Held | Globe Circumnavigated | Carver Offers Advice | Parade Possible Onepu Characterized | Koli Ball Shortage | Le-Koro Discovered | Toa Don Disguises | Top Toa Tied | Ko-Koro Welcomes Tahnok Hakuna Vakama Animation | Macku Goes Missing | In the Ice | The 1000 Word 2001 Poem | Kopaka the Toa | Honest Bionicle Trailers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petewa Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 Shut up and take my widgets. 5 Quote Mataru Nui, an Interactive Adventure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reznas Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 Hakuna Vakama! What a wonderful phraseHakuna Vakama! Ain't no passing crazeIt means lots of worries for the rest of your daysIt's our problem-filled philosophyHakuna Vakama!Hakuna Vakama?Yeah. It's our motto!What's a motto?Nothing. What's a-motto with you?Those two words will solve all your problemsThat's right. Take Nui-Jaga hereWhy, when he was a young Rahi...When I was a young RahiVery niceThanksHe found his aroma lacked a certain appealHe could clear Mata Nui after every mealI'm a sensitive soul though I seem thick-skinnedAnd it hurt that my friends never stood downwindAnd oh, the shame He was ashamedThought of changin' my name What's in a name?And I got downhearted How did ya feel?Everytime that I...Hey! Nui Jaga! Not in front of the kids!Oh. SorryHakuna Vakama! What a wonderful phraseHakuna Vakama! Ain't no passing crazeIt means no worries for the rest of your daysIt's our problem-filled philosophyHakuna Vakama!Hakuna Vakama! Hakuna Vakama!Hakuna Vakama! Hakuna Vakama!Hakuna Vakama! Hakuna Vakama!Hakuna Vakama! Hakuna--It means no worries for the rest of your daysIt's our problem-filled philosophyHakuna Vakama!(Repeats)I say "Hakuna"I say "Vakama" -Rez 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dallior Posted August 22, 2015 Share Posted August 22, 2015 Sheer brilliance. You win. MAKUTA VAKAMA! 2 Quote "Remember when the comics forum had a lot of good stuff? Let's make that a thing again." -Kazi the Matoran Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onuki Posted October 16, 2015 Author Share Posted October 16, 2015 What's a motto?Nothing. What's a-motto with you? What's a Mata? Nothing. What's a-Mata with you? I guess mine would be better in Hakuna Kopaka. Anyone want to write an ironic sequel? Thanks, guys! 2 Quote The Latest and Fakest in Bionicle News Wanted: Chronicler | Wedding Announced | Bohrok-Kal Miffed | Staring Contest Continues Hakuna Vakama | Rau Convention Held | Globe Circumnavigated | Carver Offers Advice | Parade Possible Onepu Characterized | Koli Ball Shortage | Le-Koro Discovered | Toa Don Disguises | Top Toa Tied | Ko-Koro Welcomes Tahnok Hakuna Vakama Animation | Macku Goes Missing | In the Ice | The 1000 Word 2001 Poem | Kopaka the Toa | Honest Bionicle Trailers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petewa Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 What's a motto?Nothing. What's a-motto with you? What's a Mata? Nothing. What's a-Mata with you? I guess mine would be better in Hakuna Kopaka. Anyone want to write an ironic sequel?I volunteer as tribute. 2 Quote Mataru Nui, an Interactive Adventure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TawaOfFire Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 This topic is pure genius. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonkle Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 Read this a while ago, and like all your other stuff it's comedy gold. Congrats on getting it featured! 1 Quote I been away a long time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jakura Nuva Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 (edited) Turaga only, no Nuva? Shoot.Either way, awesome. Edited October 28, 2015 by Jakura Nuva 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenny7092 Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 Man, this is a fun topic! HAKUNA VAKAMA IT MEANS NO WORRIES! 1 Quote I like Lego, Bionicle, and Hero Factory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onuki Posted October 30, 2015 Author Share Posted October 30, 2015 Thanks, everyone! And a thank you to Black Six for an article that's basically funnier than the actual story! Quote The Latest and Fakest in Bionicle News Wanted: Chronicler | Wedding Announced | Bohrok-Kal Miffed | Staring Contest Continues Hakuna Vakama | Rau Convention Held | Globe Circumnavigated | Carver Offers Advice | Parade Possible Onepu Characterized | Koli Ball Shortage | Le-Koro Discovered | Toa Don Disguises | Top Toa Tied | Ko-Koro Welcomes Tahnok Hakuna Vakama Animation | Macku Goes Missing | In the Ice | The 1000 Word 2001 Poem | Kopaka the Toa | Honest Bionicle Trailers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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