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TLhikan

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Everything posted by TLhikan

  1. I got really excited, downloaded it, and then realized that to do anything other than play Episode 1 you had to buy "bundles". I dunno, maybe I'd be less disappointed if the developer had at least called it a demo or made the whole thing cost money up front or something instead of leading everyone to believe it was a free game.
  2. Of all the elements we added, I think that Tar is one of those I had the least issue with. There are a few I wasn't on board with right away (such as Fungus and Ghost, or the canonical Psionics), but I liked Tar when it was suggested (also, the elemental prefix is Res-, not Tar-, but I think you guys know that ) .
  3. Couple things:I may have given Dawning Valor an approval too soon, someone should go over it. Also, Hunter's Folly is extremely long, has a number of grammar issues, and is currently in bright green font. Anyone wanting to judge it is going to have a bit of a headache. Did you ever hear back from Bones on that one issue? -TLhikan
  4. This is cool. I was a little afraid that we would get Mag-Matoran () or something. -TLhikan
  5. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry: Brothers by DeltaStriker. I see problems with this entry.
  6. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: At least one inaccuracy or error has been found in your entry. After reading this judge post, you are authorized to edit your entry to fix these errors. After editing to fix these things, please post in the entry topic saying what you changed. Just need to change this one to "hone" as well . Unnecessary comma. "Destroy" implies that Jovan killed them. -TLhikan
  7. I'm not sure what the point is of that; the name is Ga-Clysmax, because it's part of Clysmax and there's water on in. I don't see why we need to make up another name for it. -TLhikan
  8. I'm not sure that his being a Great Being would increase his "chances" of turning into a Toa. It's a matter of destiny. Of course, I don't really understand how destiny works in Bionicle that well anyway... -TLhikan
  9. TLhikan

    Working RPG Link

    Glad I could help! -TLhikan
  10. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry: http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=7720"]Belief[/url] by Dual Matrix I approve this entry -TLhikan
  11. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: No inaccuracies or errors were found in your entry. Unless another judge or member finds a problem later, your entry is likely to go on to the polls.
  12. Erhm, "Organization" is still misspelled. Also, "Interesting", from the same line, should not be capitalized. You can edit those. -TLhikan
  13. TLhikan

    Working RPG Link

    @Toa Lhikevikk: I had that problem too one time. Did you move the actual RPG file out of the folder? If so, put it back into the folder. @Bones: I can't seem to find the Ga-Koro key. I looked everywhere, started a new game, looked everywhere again, and can't find it. Am I doing something wrong? -TLhikan
  14. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry:http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=6699"]Rising[/url] by Toa MakaoI approve this entry.
  15. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: No inaccuracies or errors were found in your entry. Unless another judge or member finds a problem later, your entry is likely to go on to the polls. -TLhikan
  16. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry: Casualties by toa jalokim I see problems with this entry. -TLhikan
  17. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: At least one inaccuracy or error has been found in your entry. After reading this judge post, you are authorized to edit your entry to fix these errors. After editing to fix these things, please post in the entry topic saying what you changed. Capitalisation:Dark Hunter, Toa, any element name after the words "Toa of-", Metru, Kana-Ra, Lhikan, and Colesium all need to capitalized. "All" should not be capitalized "Yes" should be capitalized, "brother" should not. Grammar: ."They", not "it". Should be "two". Always write out numbers that aren't really large. No need for quotation marks. No need for a hyphen. The tense is messed up here; something like "And he soon fell unconscious due to a lack of air" (not sure if oxygen exists in the MU) works better. -TLhikan
  18. TLhikan

    Working RPG Link

    Thanks for posting this! As far as I can tell, it works fine. -TLhikan
  19. No, Bones gets the final say in all entries. As far as I know, he isn't expecting each of us to review every entry. -TLhikan
  20. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: At least one inaccuracy or error has been found in your entry. After reading this judge post, you are authorized to edit your entry to fix these errors. After editing to fix these things, please post in the entry topic saying what you changed. Just a couple more things and you should be good to go. "Organization". Spacing issue. Comma after "dead". -TLhikan
  21. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: At least one inaccuracy or error has been found in your entry. After reading this judge post, you are authorized to edit your entry to fix these errors. After editing to fix these things, please post in the entry topic saying what you changed. There are still several places where you start a new line in the middle of a sentence. Also, you wrote "gonewrong" in the first part. Use a word like "psionic energy". -TLhikan
  22. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: At least one inaccuracy or error has been found in your entry. After reading this judge post, you are authorized to edit your entry to fix these errors. After editing to fix these things, please post in the entry topic saying what you changed. Couple of things that still need to be fixed: Matoran should be capitalized. Toa should be capitalized. "Ready". "Psionic" isn't a noun. Also, "blast" is missing it's "l". There are a number of times when you start a new line in the middle of a sentence, but those should be easy to fix. Fix those, and it should be good. -TLhikan
  23. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: At least one inaccuracy or error has been found in your entry. After reading this judge post, you are authorized to edit your entry to fix these errors. After editing to fix these things, please post in the entry topic saying what you changed. Grammar/capitalization errors: Redundant. Also, "Brakas" should be capitalized. Comma after "defeat", period after "him". Commas after "powerful" and "better" are probably unnecessary, but one is needed after "thought". The word "would" is missing here. Also, the Makuta doesn't call her a "mad Rahi". This is perhaps excusable now, but later on, Gorast will put the term in quotations, as if the Makuta had actually said those words. Comma after "order". "Brotherhood" should be capitalized whenever it refers to the Brotherhood of Makuta. Missing the word "off" after "limbs". See Fisher's post on why this sentence doesn't make sense. Comma after "Besides" and "described". Should be "had been", and ad "that" before "what". Commas after "one" and the first "another". Comma after "this", "did" should be "had", "know" should be past-tense (known), the sentence should end in a question mark. Comma after "mean". Comma after "things". "You're". Comma or period after "Spirit". "Weren't being". "Wasn't". Comma after "chances". Should be a question. Missing the word "were". This phrase doesn't make a lot of sense; was each spear impaled through the absolute centre of the Matoran's body? Missing the word "being". Comma after "anything". Missing the word "to" at the end of the sentence. Should be "as I woke up" or "when he saw that I had woke up". Comma after both instances of the word "my". Comma after "forget" and "Makuta". Needs two quotation marks. Should have the word "enough" or something at the end. "Got" is incorrect. Comma after "me". Comma after "not". Comma after "life". Add the word "was" before "if". "I remember..." should start a new sentence. Double negative. Comma after "see". Comma after "Well". "That" added after "see". Get rid of either "Though" or "but"; you need one but not both. Comma after "forest". Comma after "all". Although incorrect, this sentence isn't really necessary either. Slashing someone's neck is already making sure that they are dead. Comma after "then", "You'll" should not be capitalized. "How". Comma after the first "fire". Missing a word there. Commas after "riches" and "it". Comma after "message". A "-" would fit better than "...", and ad another dash before "want". "I" is unnecessary. "Cultist" should be plural. Comma after "worries". Comma after "off". Comma after "mountain". I don't think "harder" is correct, there's nothing there to compare it to. Just plain "hard" or "difficult" will do. Comma after "peak". Comma after "wall". Comma after "said", readying not reading. Comma after "started". "That blinded me" or something like that. Rethink this sentence. "Now it was even" should be a separate sentence. "Veracity" means truthfulness. Whatever word you put there should have a comma after it. Should be "out of the way of" or something like it, sword should be possessive. Missing an "a". Comma after "sword". Both instances of the word "had" are incorrect. Commas after "know" and "going". They will what the story behind it? "In" doesn't belong there. Story/writing issues: Well, it sure sounded like he was about to before Icarax killed him. How far where these Matoran going for an Ash Bear carcass? Walking around a mountain can take days even if you aren't dragging large animal's body or travelling in a group. This Matoran never gets mentioned again. In general, Makuta can teleport. Gorast could have at least tried to get out of her bonds that way, and she doesn't think that Icarax could have telported away after his own escape. Canon issues: They didn't fight for him; they sided with him for a few minutes then realized that Teridax was going to win anyway, so walked over to Teridax's side of the room. Teridax had them killed anyway because they were untrustworthy. -TLhikan
  24. As many times as we can, but Bones has the final say on all stories. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry:http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=7743"]Certainty[/url] by Baron Von NebulaI approve this entry. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry:http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=7746"]Hunter's Folly[/url] by Felix DzerzhinskyI see problems with this entry. As an authorized Contest Judge, I have read and judged this entry:http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=7720"]Belief[/url] by Dual MatrixI see problems with this entry. -TLhikan
  25. The following comes from an authorized Contest Judge: No inaccuracies or errors were found in your entry. Unless another judge or member finds a problem later, your entry is likely to go on to the polls. -TLhikan
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