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Bionicle: Audio-Narration-Project - Chronicles - Tale of the Toa


joev14

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This is where I will be posting the chapters, and where you can give your criticism regarding them!
 
If you're interested in auditioning, check out this topic!
 
A quick summary to explain what this is. I've always loved reading Bionicle books; in fact, I have a feeling most of you do. I've always wondered though; what would it be like if it were in the form of an audio-book, with somebody reading it out loud? Furthermore, what if all the characters were voiced by different people. What if, on top of all that, there was music added from various Bionicle media to help immerse you in the world of Bionicle? That, is what ANP aims to do.
 
ANP, Audio-Narration-Project, will begin with the first book of Bionicle: Chronicles: Tale of the Toa. If all goes well, we will continue with Chronicles and finish that series, along with Bionicle: Mask of Light. I hope that if all goes well for Chronicles, that we'd be able to go on to do Adventures, Legends, and the 2009/2010 arc.
 
Trailer: September 7th
 


 
 
Prelude (Legend of Mata Nui): September 21st
 

 
Chapter 1: September 19th | Chapter 1 Remastered: September 20th 2015
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ih2exr3dkFo

 
Chapter 2: September 22nd
 

 
Chapter 3: September 24th | Chapter 3 Remastered: September 25th 2015
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5piGk6fgByM

 
Chapter 4: September 26th
 

 
Chapter 5: September 29th
 

 
Chapter 6: October 1st
 

 
Chapter 7: October 3rd
 

 
Chapter 8: October 6th
 


Chapter 9: October 9th

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXfc9E0-Jb4
 
Chapter 10: October 12th
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIXJbvIDqAc
 
Chapter 11: October 13th
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5KX7EAVylw
 
Chapter 12: October 15th
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QodyirCpX4o

Chapter 13: October 17th

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vh8Sf0PA7XM
 
Chapter 14: October 20th
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K--tPxdOXc4
 
Chapter 15: October 22nd
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSt2s78QEiM
 
Chapter 16: October 24th
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZoI_FseTLw
 
Meet-the-Cast: October 25th
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvkxTYKrsMs
 
You can find book 2 here! Edited by joev14
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Not bad for the first time around. A couple suggestions:

The Beach Chant starts exactly when the narration starts. I'd suggest, in order to present listeners with one sound element at a time rather than overwhelm them, you either have a few seconds of music before the narration starts or vice versa.

 

Also - maybe a sound effect or two might help, like some sort of whooshing flame sound when his sword turns on? I can try to assist you with that in the future if you're intesteted.

 

But all in all, nice job! I'm excited to see how the quality series improves over the months.

Edited by TheSkeletonMan939

 

 

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Not bad for the first time around. A couple suggestions:

 

The Beach Chant starts exactly when the narration starts. I'd suggest, in order to present listeners with one sound element at a time rather than overwhelm them, you either have a few seconds of music before the narration starts or vice versa.

 

Also - maybe a sound effect or two might help, like some sort of whooshing flame sound when his sword turns on? I can try to assist you with that in the future if you're intesteted.

 

But all in all, nice job! I'm excited to see how the quality series improves over the months.

I wanted to have the audio start a bit earlier, but it was actually just long enough to run as long as it did. If you'd like to look through chapters 2-6 and send me some sound effects that would fit (IE: Lewa's chapter could have some rustling leaves, whooshing as he swings across on the vine etc.) I was in a bit of a hurry to release chapter 1. (And I'm hoping to release chapter 2 tomorrow).

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Chapter 1: Sounds good. Only issue I have is that Tahu is noticeably louder than the narration. There needs to be some leveling of it, especially in the beginning. Other than that though, good job. Looking forward to the rest. =3

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Another well-done chapter! This is going a lot better than I thought it would - I figured everyone would start out terrible at their roles and sort of learn to act more enthusiastically as they went along, but everyone so far is starting out really well! I'm definitely impressed.

Edited by TheSkeletonMan939

 

 

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Haven't checked back here in a while, but I'm glad I did. One comment, especially on chapter 2: Please try to be consistent with the pronunciation of the names. Hearing both the incorrect "Loo-ah" and the correct "Lee-wah" one sentence after another is more than a little jarring. Like you said with sound quality: everyone needs to be on the same page, and that does not exclude the narrator.  ;) Beyond that, I have no complaints!

Edited by ~The 1st Shadow~
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http://biosector01.com/wiki/index.php/Lewa

 

Technically, the correct pronunciation is "LAY-wah" but in some of the audio serials, I distinctly recall hearing him saw "Lee-wah." 

 

A minor nitpick, in any case, but it does help if the names are being pronounced the same, otherwise it could sound like you're talking about two different characters. Remember Dark mirror, when Greg's pronunciation of Krika's name made people think he said "Krekka?" My advice would be to avoid that kind of confusion.

Edited by ~The 1st Shadow~
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Huh, so all that time that I was pronouncing it LAY-wah was actually right? Huh. I've taken to pronouncing it Lew-ah. Either way, I do agree that it would help to have definite pronunciations, and maybe to just re-record those specific lines that have already been done. I'd understand time saying otherwise though. =3 On the same note, it's pronounced fo-li-age, not foil-age. =P Again, minor nitpicks, still great work.

 

Can't wait for more- especially if/when I have a role come up.

Edited by Toa of Dancing
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Not bad. I can see that you're not gonna change your mind on that Lewa thing, so I'll ignore it for now. But, really, it really does detract from the overall presentation of the story, especially if you're doing this for fans who have been hearing and using the official pronunciations for years.

 

On a similar note, the names "Onua" and "Onewa" are pronounced very differently. "oh-NOO-ah" and "AH-neh-wah," respectively. This is where you're gonna have a confusion problem. 

 

Everything else is great, but I feel like Gali sounds a bit too shy and subdued than she should be. More confidence on her part would be much better. Everyone else's performance is great!

 

Sorry if I sound a bit too critical, but that's just how I am.  :shrugs:

Edited by ~The 1st Shadow~
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I actually laughed when I heard Whenua's voice - it was spot on, and sounded exactly like an old man. Onua's voice was well-done, too.

 

I know I'm a bit late in replying to this, but thank you very much. I wasn't sure how my Whenua voice sounded as I have typically not been very good at doing older voices. Your compliment means a lot to me  :)

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Nicely done. 

 

But, again, Gali... Too calm, too quiet.

Mulan-Mushu-Panda-Messenger.jpg

 

A little more emotion. From everyone, actually. Well, Lewa and Kopaka are doing great, but remember that this isn't a movie--we don't have any visual cues as to how the characters are behaving and feeling at any given point, which means you have to rely solely on how you use the voices. Tahu constantly sounds grumpy, Gali is constantly shy and quiet, etc. There aren't enough emotions being carried here, with very few exceptions. 

 

Again, this truly is a great project, but only if done right. To tell a good story, you've gotta make it come alive. Speaking with the same general tone isn't doing a thing to help that. You're doing fine, joev14, as are Eljay and MrSciFiGuy. Onua and Pohatu are doing alright, but there's room for improvement. Tahu and Gali are where this is the most noticeable.

 

For future reference, liven it up a bit more. Add some flare. Make it fun and engaging to listen to. (Not that it isn't already, but don't get too comfortable with it that you start to slip. ;) )

 

Actually, I find it hilariously ironic that Kopaka shows more emotion in this project than some of the more emotional Toa in the storyline. :P

 

That said, I look forward to the remaining chapters! :)

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Nicely done. 

 

But, again, Gali... Too calm, too quiet.

Mulan-Mushu-Panda-Messenger.jpg

 

A little more emotion. From everyone, actually. Well, Lewa and Kopaka are doing great, but remember that this isn't a movie--we don't have any visual cues as to how the characters are behaving and feeling at any given point, which means you have to rely solely on how you use the voices. Tahu constantly sounds grumpy, Gali is constantly shy and quiet, etc. There aren't enough emotions being carried here, with very few exceptions. 

 

Again, this truly is a great project, but only if done right. To tell a good story, you've gotta make it come alive. Speaking with the same general tone isn't doing a thing to help that. You're doing fine, joev14, as are Eljay and MrSciFiGuy. Onua and Pohatu are doing alright, but there's room for improvement. Tahu and Gali are where this is the most noticeable.

 

For future reference, liven it up a bit more. Add some flare. Make it fun and engaging to listen to. (Not that it isn't already, but don't get too comfortable with it that you start to slip. ;) )

 

Actually, I find it hilariously ironic that Kopaka shows more emotion in this project than some of the more emotional Toa in the storyline. :P

 

That said, I look forward to the remaining chapters! :)

In my defense for Tahu, thats because he is grumpy. He's grumpy for most of the book. Everything annoys him, because 1. He's not getting his way most of the time, and 2. He doesn't want to open up to anyone. He's a very grumpy dude. In the episode that has him confronting the Nui-Rama's, all he does in the beginning is complain about Kopaka. 2 chapters ago, he got so fed up with everything, that he almost burned down a forest just to get through with everything faster. Heck, the first chapter, one of the first things he does is get frustrated with him sword because it was not what he expected. 

Context is very important to my acting. I can try to liven up as much as I can, but I won't put emotion where it does not belong. 

And I will say, if you can provide some specific examples of where there could be some changes, that can help me with my process, and understanding you point of view a little better! 

-SK

Edited by SkullKid
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In my defense for Tahu, thats because he is grumpy. He's grumpy for most of the book. Everything annoys him, because 1. He's not getting his way most of the time, and 2. He doesn't want to open up to anyone. He's a very grumpy dude. In the episode that has him confronting the Nui-Rama's, all he does in the beginning is complain about Kopaka. 2 chapters ago, he got so fed up with everything, that he almost burned down a forest just to get through with everything faster. Heck, the first chapter, one of the first things he does is get frustrated with him sword because it was not what he expected. 

Context is very important to my acting. I can try to liven up as much as I can, but I won't put emotion where it does not belong. 

And I will say, if you can provide some specific examples of where there could be some changes, that can help me with my process, and understanding you point of view a little better! 

-SK

 

I'll give them another listen-through when I have a chance. Gali's parts are where I noticed it most, and I understand where you're coming from on him being annoyed by everything. I'm just thinking along the lines of whenever I'm in a mood--I don't always have the same tone of voice. Different situations, different outlook, if that makes any sense. Otherwise, you're doing alright! :) (I hope I'm not coming across as too harsh.)

Edited by ~The 1st Shadow~
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In my defense for Tahu, thats because he is grumpy. He's grumpy for most of the book. Everything annoys him, because 1. He's not getting his way most of the time, and 2. He doesn't want to open up to anyone. He's a very grumpy dude. In the episode that has him confronting the Nui-Rama's, all he does in the beginning is complain about Kopaka. 2 chapters ago, he got so fed up with everything, that he almost burned down a forest just to get through with everything faster. Heck, the first chapter, one of the first things he does is get frustrated with him sword because it was not what he expected. 

Context is very important to my acting. I can try to liven up as much as I can, but I won't put emotion where it does not belong. 

And I will say, if you can provide some specific examples of where there could be some changes, that can help me with my process, and understanding you point of view a little better! 

-SK

 

I'll give them another listen-through when I have a chance. Gali's parts are where I noticed it most, and I understand where you're coming from on him being annoyed by everything. I'm just thinking along the lines of whenever I'm in a mood--I don't always have the same tone of voice. Different situations, different outlook, if that makes any sense. Otherwise, you're doing alright! :) (I hope I'm not coming across as too harsh.)

 

You are by no means being harsh. Critique is always welcome, especially constructive criticism. ;)

I value constructive criticism, because it helps me grow as an actor. Sometimes, its just hard to take a general critique and work it in. Specificity is golden!

-SK

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Nicely done. 

 

But, again, Gali... Too calm, too quiet.

Mulan-Mushu-Panda-Messenger.jpg

 

A little more emotion. From everyone, actually. Well, Lewa and Kopaka are doing great, but remember that this isn't a movie--we don't have any visual cues as to how the characters are behaving and feeling at any given point, which means you have to rely solely on how you use the voices. Tahu constantly sounds grumpy, Gali is constantly shy and quiet, etc. There aren't enough emotions being carried here, with very few exceptions. 

 

Again, this truly is a great project, but only if done right. To tell a good story, you've gotta make it come alive. Speaking with the same general tone isn't doing a thing to help that. You're doing fine, joev14, as are Eljay and MrSciFiGuy. Onua and Pohatu are doing alright, but there's room for improvement. Tahu and Gali are where this is the most noticeable.

 

For future reference, liven it up a bit more. Add some flare. Make it fun and engaging to listen to. (Not that it isn't already, but don't get too comfortable with it that you start to slip. ;) )

 

Actually, I find it hilariously ironic that Kopaka shows more emotion in this project than some of the more emotional Toa in the storyline. :P

 

That said, I look forward to the remaining chapters! :)

Thanks for the feedback!

 

Gali's actress was a last-minute addition, due to some issues with the previous one. As you may know, finding actresses for a series like this can be very difficult. However, as we begin working on book 2, I have some plans to help improve all the characters in general. Specific feedback would be great!

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Thanks for the feedback!

Gali's actress was a last-minute addition, due to some issues with the previous one. As you may know, finding actresses for a series like this can be very difficult. However, as we begin working on book 2, I have some plans to help improve all the characters in general. Specific feedback would be great!

 

Ah. I see.

 

I sent SK some specifics on his performance, so he'll be getting to that eventually.

 

For Gali, I don't know how much more specific I can be. Everyone else either has a wide variety of emotions, or bounces back and forth between two or three. Gali just sounds like she's reading straight from a script for the first time. The part where she was getting at Tahu for burning down a tree was the most emotional she's been throughout the entire thing, and even that wasn't much of a difference. 

 

For example, listen to (don't watch) this scene from a recent Doctor Who episode. The way his tone changes with his erratic emotions. Basically, open the link, and scroll down so you can't see the facial expressions, to simulate this project. The situation doesn't change, but the character's reactions do, and it's easy to hear. Kopaka is the best example of this so far, but this was just to help get an idea of what I mean. Right now I don't know how else to explain it. :shrugs:

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I want to throw my two cents into the conversation that the overall quality of this is still amazing considering the fact that it's a slap-together group on a fansite that was mostly obsolete until after the project started. That's impressive.

 

The acting is great from most, and I do agree for the most part with SK that Tahu should sound annoyed most of the time. And as for Gali, I do think she's had a few scenes that she has improved with, the main one being the forest scene with Tahu. Yes, some fluctuation in volume, tone, etc. would work great, but overall I think she's gotten better. =3

 

All that said, keep up the good work guys. Looking forward to my part in all this once we get past the beginnings.

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