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Rau Convention Held


Onuki

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Rau Convention Held

Members Discover Striking Similarity

 

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Lakeside Ga-Koro is still recovering from hosting its first official and third unofficial Rau Convention earlier this weekend.  The prestigious event began late Friday night and reportedly only concluded after an ambitious all-nighter at sunrise on Sunday.

 

Turaga Nokama, competent Turaga and mediocre President of the Alpha Gamma Rau Society, was seen hastily dropping the keys to the Koro in the hands of a bewildered Macku late Friday afternoon, distractedly muttering, “You’re on your own.”

 

Reports streamed in all weekend testifying to the wide range of esoteric activities that took place behind doorways that had no doors to close.  After a brief opening ceremony, Nokama allegedly called the gathering to order, enthusiastically shoving a disturbingly detailed sign-in roster under each member’s nose in turn.  Following this, a mystical Reading of the Ancient Runes was held, with all members present engaging their masks in a pleasant if somewhat useless exercise of rune translation.

 

“We only get together once a year,” explained prominent Rau Society member and occasional home appliance spokesperson Kotu.  “If it weren’t for these meetings, none of Mata Nui’s crucial prophecy translation would ever get done,” she commented, citing a chief reason of Nokama’s laziness.  At this accusation, Turaga Nokama was reported to gesture wildly and hurriedly explain that not even a timely prophecy reading could have predicted the recent sinking of Hahli’s vacation yacht.

 

Saturday’s proceedings were reputedly filled with the Alpha Gamma Rau Convention’s traditional mindless festivities, among them idle mask-painting and “using Rau as surfboards.”

 

It was not until the Great Sleepless Sleepover of Saturday night that members Nokama and Kotu allegedly discovered that they do, in fact, wear the same mask.  As the society’s only current members, the two were delighted to realize the uncanny resemblance they bear to each other, leading some to speculate on the identity of a common ancestor.  Sources reveal that the convention still came to a close Sunday morning with the traditional practice of swimming around the convention hut several thousand times, but not before Turaga Nokama and Kotu reportedly bonded to a new level in their professional relationship.

 

Kotu thoughtfully concluded her account of the weekend: “You can spend so much time working and fighting with someone and never realize the things you have in common.”

 

With the majority of the town’s chief officials thus occupied, Deputy Matoran Macku reportedly only just prevented the berserk villagers from sinking Ga-Koro before Monday.

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It was not until the Great Sleepless Sleepover of Saturday night that members Nokama and Kotu allegedly discovered that they do, in fact, wear the same mask.  As the society’s only current members, the two were delighted to realize the uncanny resemblance they bear to each other, leading some to speculate on the identity of a common ancestor.  Sources reveal that the convention still came to a close Sunday morning with the traditional practice of swimming around the convention hut several thousand times, but not before Turaga Nokama and Kotu reportedly bonded to a new level in their professional relationship.

 

Okay, that paragraph is probably the funniest in this entire thing.

 

Also, have you considered putting all of these News Story-type comedies into one thread?

Edited by Boxorak the Azure Noob
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My MOCs:
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Thanks, glad you enjoyed it!

 

Also, have you considered putting all of these News Story-type comedies into one thread?

 

I have; there are definitely reasons to do it either way. I'm opting to post them separately because they are technically all standalone works and don't require the reader to have read any previous installments.  I used to write both long and short comedies and I know that people don't always want to sit through the long stuff. :P This way, people can click on titles that interest them without having to sift through an entire topic, which can be daunting.  I also hesitate to post them all in one thread because I want to leave open the possibility of writing new situations or personalities that contradict what I've already written, although I admit that for the most part the personalities and overall perspectives have so far been the same.

 

In the old days, the Comedies forum was so active that everything was bumped down the page quickly, multi-post or not, so I guess my way of doing it is also a holdover from those days.  I think if I were writing them any faster now, I would seriously think about merging them into one topic.

 

All that said, I will probably have to remake my library topic soon. :P

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It would be like Ahkmou to argue for racism and not religious discrimination.

Yes, he's kind of an idiot.

How many characters have a Rau anyway? I think we need Tamaru at the convention. 

They're being racist for not allowing anyone who's not blue into the convention, just think of the white, black, brown, red, and green children out there with Raus who could've come to this thing if not for the racism of a few Ga-Matoran.

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