Toa Sonis

The piece colors are really nifty. The concept of being able to play halfway through is nice too, in case a younger one gets bored. Very unique!

Besides the bunny quote and the "I finally found a Hero I'm proud to have on my side", I think this is my favorite.I recently started (and finished) reading all of this comedy, and I really enjoy it. There do seem to be a few to many characters to keep reasonable track of, however...that could just be me. :PAlso like to see a little more Vezon. And (as a girl), please don't ever attempt girl conversation again...

My first impression after reading this comedy (mostly to find out what happened in between the lines in The Nuva Inn) was to laugh...really hard and really long. I would like to see more of the author contest though...its utter randomness is absolutely hilarious.Question for Matau: Can he fly any better these days than he did in Legends of Metru Nui?EDIT: Where's our next chapter?!

Random, strangely repetitive (I'm starting to feel a sense of de ja vu..), some of Bionicle's most pokable characters, and Vezon...everything a good comedy needs!

So far, I think you're doing a good job maintaining the original personalities of the first three (or now, I guess, two) Toa. Paqyar seemed to fade into the background a bit, but the others are just what they were--noble and strong, with slightly less experience and bitterness than the other three. The mix of personalities in the Toa Muktirhith doesn't really bother me much.Nice comeback for the (Dark Hunter) Vortixx! Your incorporation of him seemed easy enough, yet just as mysterious as all other times.

Very consistent writing throughout all twenty chapters. I also like the continued mystery and suspense, it adds to the overall story structure.My only complaint is the long deviation from the Toa's original purpose. I know it's necessary, but the impatient side of me wants them to get back sooner. I would also like to discover the identity of the mysterious Dark Hunter Vortixx...but I guess as they're on their way to Xia, maybe something will occur there?

That must be a little surprising...and then to find out it's not Gali...Nice take on Bara Magna, and I'm so glad you used Berix! He's one of my favorites, if only for the "collecting" lines in the movie.

Sure,"Vilam woke up and saw the ground moving in a blur under her. Her wrists were tied together and someone was carrying her over her shoulder. He looked and saw it was a white and black-armored being with a crested head."I assume the "he" part at the beginning of the second sentence is actually referring to Vilam. I have also noticed this error occurs primarily in the later chapters, at least after they become Toa.Chapter 14 is well done, fits with the rest of the story well. The only part I didn't understand was the Turaga saying he had "given up his Toa power long before". I may just be ignorant, but I was under the impression that Toa immediately turned into Turaga upon giving up their powers. Does this mean Vibrak was a Turaga at the time they fought the titan-beast? Please correct me if I'm wrong...

Another thing on the Kazi theory: it may be insignificant, but when summarizing the cast of characters in all the Legends books, it says Kazi: A Ko-Matoran with many secrets.Just thinking...

It is excellently written, especially for a first-time epic. The way you handle fight and travel scenes is well done--there's just enough action, without it being too confusing or to non-descript. All the mysteries in the background of the story help the plot along, and provide some extra excitement for the reader.My only complaint so far is that you sometimes (presumably accidently) refer to Vilam as a he. This can lead to some confusion as to who's doing what, but other than that it's all good!

After 2010, I would say Tuma was pretty much useless. He was a problem for the Glatorian and stuff, but once he was defeated by Mata Nui he doesn't seem to have served much of a purpose.And I agree with everyone else that they could have gotten rid of Dume.

An entirely new take on both Bohrok and Rahkshi. Refreshing. My favorite part is easily two of Hello's least favorite things--tulips and quantum mechanics. Hilarious! Anyway, only problem I can find is this: “We could parade around Mata Nui selling all this stuff, and we'll make a %100 profit, unless those pesky zoning laws come into effect, but then again, it would be considered a mobile endavour...”100% should like so.Very nice!

It's ccertainly written in an interesting style--now I know why. I enjoy the feeling of reading a regular book while at the same time experiencing jokes and such randomness as one would find in a comedy. It was certainly well-fused!

Oi. An immortal Helryx would certainly be a scary thought. By the way, nice "fourth ceiling" thing...maybe they're in a decagon.

How exactly do Matorn get cancer again?The um, character of Takua's brain is very...unique. I guess that does fit his personality though.Well done!

Wow, that was...amazing and ridiculous all in one. Everything a comedy should be. I laughed really hard over the Toa's and Rahkshi's descriptions, they were brilliantly done. I do wish Wiidi (and consequently, his plant rake) had lived though.I couldn't find any spelling errors. I'm not going to comment on grammer though. I have enough of my own trouble with it.

Coconuts? Painted Kanohi? Certainly an interesting comedy...

What is Nuju doing with a bunch of stuff that could be potentially bad for society?? I'm not sure I trust him..Certainly more comedic, it will be interesting to see how this turns out.

Oh dear...live guppies on a pizza...that just doesn't sound good. FISH SLAPPING TOURNAMENT at the School of Villany foreseen...

Love the iBrick! Heeheehee. Quite clever, really...

Poor Taipu. But the airspeed velocity of a Gukko part was really randomly hilarious!

Nuju took five years to find blueprints!? He's either really slow, really thorough, really lazy, or some combination of the three...This is gonna be quite the battle. And what on earth is Kopaka doing there?

World Record thing's a little random...but hey, that's what comedy's for, right?Drat, now I'm going to have to go look up how big that pizza actually was. And what they did with it afterwards. :rolleyes:Also, I like the old double-space format better...if you can get it back...

Give you nice gold armor and maybe an improved body structure.Nice take on the whole golden armor thing...can't wait to see how Tahu manages to pull off an escape from Helryx!

I recently finished reading Stellar Quest and was amazed at the depth and quality of the emotions you conveyed. The characters were kept constant and their dialogue perfectly portrayed their character. Amazing!