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Taipu1

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Blog Comments posted by Taipu1

  1. -“Yes, for what reason?” Vakama asked rhetorically

    -“Vakama?” Nuurakh’s tone was more concerned than angry.

     

    I think the formatting there is a bit misleading. I'm not sure you meant to continue the italics for the rest of the "Vakama asked rhetorically" bit. Italics covering a whole line often implies a thought, as opposed to speech. This could go either way.

     

    Other than that, it's a lot better written than previously, but you've still got the odd typo/mispelling in there.

  2. It's a good plan, I never did that, and so I look at stuff I've written in the past and thing "Argh! Why would I even have posted this stuff?"

     

    You don't want to be in that situation, I tell you now. Most important thing to do is be your own fan.

     

    I will also write a fair chunk of the story before I release it so you can really get the gist of the plot.

     

    I'm doing something similar, I've already got two chapters written up for an epic I'm working on. I haven't posted them yet, because I want to make sure the plot has a solid direction before I post it. It's kind of a different situation, as I'm actually re-writing one of my old epics (One of the ones I looked back at and thought "Argh!" as it happens. :P).

     

    I look forward to seeing this when you re-release it. It's better to tackle issues earlier on, a lot of my epics have just been left unfinished because I let them escalate out of control.

  3. Matau was more similar to his canon self, so that was fairly relatable. Nokama seems to have a very different personality, and she does seem rather shallow, even she doesn't want to.

     

    I was wondering about one thing. From the first few lines of the first chapter, I concluded the whole "Mata Nui is a Giant robot with a universe inside of him" thing still stood, and by extension his question to remerge Spherus Magna. Are you kind of making it so that the beings inside of him have gained more sentience, and are more emotionally complex? It seems like the stories more about the interactions of the characters inside the MU, and perhaps Mata Nui's well being and quest will have less relevance?

  4. My missing your blog entry aside, the stories looking to be pretty deep, in terms of the psychology of the characters. The second chapter draws you in more than the first, as the first seems like the characters are in pretty much normal situations, with the exception of whatever Nuju spotted. The Lhikan and Nidhiki story looks to be more intriguing, there's obviously something unusual afoot.

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