Toa of Nerds

Oh shoot, that was a complete mistake. I'll leave it in there to serve as a remind to double check my work .-don't touch my pocket protector

Product Seventeen Host: For months now you’ve had to suffer through me try to peddle useless junk to you! You sat through boring commercial after boring commercial for only one thing:Audience: The free gifts!Host: That’s right! For once we’re actually giving you what you want instead of telling you what you want!Audience: Really?Host: That’s right! An entire product that’s nothing but free gifts! It’s completely unbelievable!Audience: Totally!Host: We’re putting together all of YOUR favorite free gifts into one mega free gift package!Audience: Yay!Host: Everybody knows that you don’t really care about the actual product; all you care about is the free stuff that comes with it! So we’re just cutting to the chase!Audience: At last! Somebody who listens to us instead of shouting at us!Host: OH, I’M NOT DONE SHOUTING!Audience: Bummer.Host: Because in this amazing package you get all our most popular free gifts!Audience: Incredible!!!Host: You won’t find any other direct marketing agency doing this!Audience: Incredible!Host: This odd assortment of free junk could be yours very soon!Audience: Incred—wait, why don’t you cut to the chase and tell us what you’re peddling?Host: Oh, yeah, in this package you’ll get our customer favorite BZPower bed sheets, which we sold as a free gift with Fax-O-Power! These sheets are manufactured by 500 skilled Chinese laborers and made of 100% natural Egyptian Polyester! You will not find a better deal anywhere else!Audience: Sweet Dreams!Host: And what’s more, we’re bundling it with another amazing free gift: Compliment-Bot 3000! Now I can tell you right away that absolutely nobody wants this product, but that’s never stopped us in the past!Audience: No it hasn’t!Host: Nobody used this partly because they were afraid that DITTO!-bot would invade their computer and steal all their personal information, but mostly because they were too busy using Flame-Bot 3000, which isn’t free.Audience: Shucks!Host: But we thought “what the heck” and just threw it in there!Audience: That’s the spirit!Host: But that’s not all! We’re also giving you a lifetime supply of coconut slushies!Audience: Huzzah!Host: Am I done?Audience: NO!Host: That’s right, because I’ll also throw in a genuine four-leaf clover, because today is Saint Patty’s!Audience: Yay!Host: So if you aren’t wearing green today and just offended your Irish neighbor, hand him this clover and make his day!Audience: All right!Host: How much do you think this amazing collection of free gifts cost? Audience: Nothing!Host: NO!Audience: No?Host: That’s right, this amazing collection is only $19.95!Audience: Wow!Host: UBZPJTUMH! is the only place where 0+0+0+0=19.95! So call 1-800-NOT-FREE right now!Audience: We’re totally doing it!Host: But that isn’t all, if you use your credit card, we’re going to double the offer! That’s right, you get TWO of EVERYTHING!Audience: EIGHT for the price of FOUR!Host: But I’m not done, because if you are the first caller, I’ll also throw in this extra fortune cookie I got at a Chinese restaurant!Audience: No way!Host: That’s right, you get everything you could have ever dreamed of, and it’s all only a phone call away!Audience: Call now!

From my understanding Ta-Koro was really close to the volcano but not actually inside of it. Building a village inside of a volcano wouldn't exactly be the smartest thing to do .-don't touch my pocket protector

I listen to every episode and I always enjoy it. The Powercast is one of my favorite parts on BZPower. If I have one criticism, it's that some of the segments seem to drag on a little bit too long, but that's really minor. Overall, I love it.-don't touch my pocket protector

Product Sixteen Announcer: Have you been waiting for a beauty line that works on your metallic matoran skin?Audience: Yes!Announcer: Have you been waiting for a system that will match your very DNA to match your armor-tone exactly?Audience: Yes!Announcer: Have you been waiting for a system that can make you look 20,000 years younger?Audience: Yes!Announcer: Well, the wait is over! Because now we’re unveiling the brand-new Skin Cleansing DNA Age-Defiant Flawless Smooth Active Tone-Match Beauty System!Audience: At last!Announcer: This incredible new system is like no other! Unlike the competition’s beauty product, this one has my face on the bottle!Announcer: And we all know that makes all the difference!Audience: It sure does!Announcer: And check out my complexion! I’ve used this product for the passed 3,000 years, and I can guarantee you it works!Audience: All right!Announcer: And the amazing thing about this is that it isn’t just one product, it’s a whole beauty system!Audience: Ooooooh!Announcer: For the price of only one facial cream from the competition, you get 27 different beauty products in one package, all specially designed for you!Audience: 27 for the price of 1!Announcer: And the best part is that using this amazing system is quick and easy!Audience: Yes!Announcer: Here’s how it works: First, you use our amazing pro-active cleanser, then our moister-sensing drying powder, then the patented hydration system containing three revolutionary hydrators (in three separate bottles, of course) then you selected one of 10 DNA tone-matchers, follow that up with our wrinkle-minimizer, then our wrinkle-raiser, and then our wrinkle-eraser. Why you can’t just erase the wrinkles from the start beats me, but I’m just going by the instructions, as you can probably tell, I never use beauty products!Audience: Ummmmm…Announcer: Oh, don’t worry about that, I contradict myself all the time! In anyway, where was I? Oh yes, the wrinkle stuff! After that, use our pore-reducing gel, then the crow’s feet removing injection, then the nose-beautifying clamps!Audience: Clamps?Announcer: Oh, don’t worry about the clamps! The crow’s feet injection makes your whole face numb so you can’t feel them!Audience: Oh.Announcer: Then put on our amazing lipstick! You’ll have four colors to choose from: Candy Red, Blood Red, Absurdly Red, and Martian Blue (colloquially known as “I can’t believe it’s not red!”)Audience: Ah!Announcer: After that use our patented do-it-yourself botox injector, and then finish off with our night cream. The whole process takes only 12 hours, and if you do it twice a day every day, you should start to see results in only 6-8 months!Audience: Wow! Fast results!Announcer: This system will give you amazing results! Check out this customer! Here’s what he looked like before:And after:Audience: Amazing!Announcer: And there’s more!Audience: More?Announcer: Yes, more! Because if you order now you’ll also get our amazing Absurdly Long Lash kit for absurdly long lashes!Audience: Incredible!Announcer: That’s right, with this amazing kit you’ll get lashes that are 3 feet long!Audience: Wow, is that legal?Announcer: Oh no, but who cares?Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Are you tired of your lashes falling off and becoming deformed? Well, forget about that, because these suckers are made out of weapons grade titanium!Audience: Yeah, definitely not legal…Announcer: And it’s yours completely free! How much could an amazing product like this cost?Audience: $500?Announcer: NO!Audience: $400?Announcer: NO!Audience: $200?Announcer: NO! Get all this for the low, low price of $199.95! This amazing deal is not available in stores, so you need to call right now! What are you waiting for, pick up the phone!

Wow, this looks awesome. Unfortunately, I found this in March and I've already got a super awesome Red Wings calendar, so I won't be using it as a calendar. However, I will use it to ogle great looking artwork. Fantastic job!-don't touch my pocket protector

Yeah, Iggy's still in their, he just only comes out when he feels like it. Right now there really isn't any reason for him to come out.-don't touch my pocket protector

I think I kind of reversed the idea a little bit, but it was still your idea. The problem with your idea is that your product would actually be helpful to the community. We here at UBZPSTUMH! have a policy against improving the BZP community with our products .-don't touch my pocket protector

If they've completely succumbed to the poison then they essentially become rahi. Even though they were toa, that isn't part of them anymore and I believe a Makuta could control them. However, if they are still in that half state, I think the toa side would triumph in that instance. Even though the Hordika had bestial urges, they were still toa at heart.-don't touch my pocket protector

Well, it's just like in the real world, people develop different ways of communicating. Even within the same language you see variations in spelling and writing (just take a look at the differences between written American English and written British English). Tire/tyre, check/cheque, center/centre, color/colour. It goes on and on even thought its the same word and pronounced the same.-don't touch my pocket protector

They just haven't fulfilled their destinies yet. Maybe the Great Beings have something else in store for them? Who knows.-don't touch my pocket protector

Thanks, I didn't notice that!Unfortunately, this week is really busy for me, so I'm not going to be able to post a chapter this Saturday. In the meantime, I hope you'll settle for this complimentary trampoline:So you can leap on leap day!-don't touch my pocket protector

Sadly, due to an unfortunate confluence of laziness and procrastination, this week's chapter is late. Forgive me for being late. Also forgive me for some broken quote tags that I'll fix tomorrow. EDIT: Okay, the editor is just not liking those quote tags. I did fix the title, though. Product FifteenCredit to tent163phantoka Announcer: Is somebody annoying you by telling you everything that you post is against the rules?Audience: Yes!Announcer: Is your pony parade getting rained on by people who don’t appreciate your interests?Audience: Yes!Announcer: Then you need Cite-the-rules-and-prove-that-its-nothing-to-complain-about-bot 9000!Audience: Wow! That’s a mouth-full!Announcer: Yes it is! And it’ll give your enemies an earful when they try to say that you’ve broken the rules!Audience: Amazing!Announcer: Here’s how it works: whenever somebody starts annoying you by saying you’re breaking the rules, simply set this baby onto them and they’ll see a barrage of quotes from the rules with absolutely no relevance to the topic at hand!Audience: Why?Announcer: Well, for two reasons. One, it convinces them that you know more about the rules than them. And two, if your post actually did break the rules, you won’t have to worry about revealing yourself! It’s a win-win!Audience: Amazing!Announcer: Here, check it out in action (dramatization, individual results may vary):Dude, I love ponies!That’s totally against the rules man!Proto Energy is BZPower's equivalent of a merit/demerit system. Administrators, Global Moderators, and Forum Leaders (within their forums) have the ability to adjust your Proto Energy level higher or lower should your activity at BZPower warrant it.Do not use non-English languages or leet to bypass the word filter.Premier Membership is a way for the Membership to help defray the costs of BZPower's webhosting by donating to the owners of the site.Wow, I wish I didn’t say anything.Audience: Amazing!Announcer: That’s right! Nothing tells trolls to buzz off like a good quoting from ye olde rule book!Audience: That’s right!Announcer: Check out another example (once again, totally fake):Check out my awesome new forum game!Your not a premier member! That’s against the rules!Oh really?If the images or information were not officially released by LEGO or a reliable source, they cannot be posted on BZPower.This forum is for LEGO-related games. This includes Bionicle and Hero Factory. Other games belong in CoT.Welcome to BZPower's Q&A Forum. This forum exists as a service to all members whether new or old who have questions BZPower, it's traditions, how the forums work, or other questions related to BZPower in general.See? I haz read da rulez!!1!1Woah man, I’m sorry. What you’re doing is totally legal.Audience: No way!Announcer: Still don’t believe me?Audience: No, we do!Announcer: Well, I’ll just pretend that you don’t so I can show you this next example!Audience: Yay!Announcer: Here it is (if you actually get this result, then you are one lucky son of a kikanalo):Check it out! I found a full free copy of Bionicle: Mask of Light on arrrrg.ibeapirate.illegalDude, that’s totally illegal!No it isn’t!But it’s got the words “illegal” in it’s URL!That’s just a marketing tactic.Advertising for commercial sites of any kind is not permitted whether in a signature, profile, post, Private Message, etc.Generally, someone is banned from BZPower for breaking a major rule, violating a number of smaller rules, or being a perpetual annoyance to the Staff.Legal action. Legal action is not out of the question if property destruction occurs because of malicious behavior such as hacking transmitting viruses. You can be traced in all the actions you perform, so think twice about doing anything serious. We have no problem with throwing a mischievous 14-year-old in jail should they cause damage.Wow, you’re totally right, that’s not illegal.As a staff member, I would usually punish you for this kind of stuff, but all those random rules that were just quoted makes me think that you did nothing wrong! Keep on posting this stuff!Audience: Incredible!Announcer: Exactly! And what’s more, Cite-the-rules-and-prove-that-its-nothing-to-complain-about-bot 9000 is completely DITTO! free!DITTO!Announcer: See, it agrees!Audience: Wow!Announcer: So what are you waiting for?Audience: You to give us the number!Announcer: Oh, call 1-800-IS-LEGAL. That’s 1-800-475-3425! 1-800-475-3425!Audience: Start dialing!Announcer: Now it’s available for only $99.95!Audience: No way!Announcer: But act now, because this amazing sale price will only last for the next five seconds!Audience: GASP!Massive Countdown Clock: 5Massive Countdown Clock: 4Massive Countdown Clock: 3Massive Countdown Clock: 2Massive Countdown Clock: 1Announcer: Oops, time’s up! Looks like you’ll have to pay the still amazingly low price of $1999.95!Audience: What a bargain!Announcer: So call now!

I really like it. It's simple, but has is very well built and I love how it has functionality. Personally, I like the comically large gun. Why would you want to build a mech that could only hold a small gun? Anyway, the only criticism I have actually isn't about the MOC itself; it's about the pictures. The inside pictures have some weird lighting that makes the MOC hard to see. I think the light is too bright. But this isn't the artwork forum for photography, this is BBC for MOCing ability, and I'd have to give the MOC itself a 9/10. Great job! -don't touch my pocket protector

Thanks! I put it up in my first post so everybody can find it.-don't touch my pocket protector

Say what you want about Friends, but you could real value if you buy them. For only $20 you can get a decent set (or two!). What will $20 get in you in LotR or Star Wars sets? Not much.-don't touch my pocket protector

Lego Exec: Hey, what's something in the Star Wars universe that we haven't made a bazillion versions of?Lead Designer: PLANETS!!!Lego Exec: Alright, make a Lego set for Star Wars' planets!But honestly, I think the planets look quite neat. And if you get them all, then you could set up a campaign map and have an epic real life version of Empire at War's turn-based mode. Sweet.-don't touch my pocket protector

Product Thirteen Announcer: Did you just receive a valentine from somebody who you can’t stand anymore?Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Do you want to get himWell-Dressed Lawyer: *cough*Announcer: …or her or your back!Audience: Yeah!Announcer: But are you too afraid to do in it person?Audience: Um…Announcer: Never fear! Now from the makers of BZP-tine comes the Valentine Rejecter 3000!Audience: Yes!Announcer: Instead of getting emotionally tied to a response, just have Valentine Rejecter 3000 send an emotionless computer generated message for you!Audience: At last!Announcer: These soul-less and clearly automated messages make it clear that you don’t want him...or her…anymore!Audience: Yay!Announcer: Now you can break up the easy way with Valentine Rejecter 3000!Audience: If it ain’t easy, it ain’t worth trying!Announcer: You said it! For maximum emotional impact, print the message on the very valentine your former beloved sent you! Take a look:Audience: Ah!Announcer: But this amazing product is limited to just valentines!Audience: It isn’t?Announcer: No! Use it on birthday cards! Use it on get-well-soon cards! Use it on Christmas cards! Or use it on “happy anniversary” cards for the big breakup!Well-Dressed Lawyer: Oh, and if I might interject, my legal services are fully available should you want to go for the aforementioned “big breakup”. Just call 1-800-DIVORCE.Audience: Yay!Announcer: That’s right; there are tons of uses for this incredible product! You will never have to write a heart-filled rejection letter again!Audience: All right!Announcer: But that’s not all you’re getting! If you call within the next 15 minutes, we’ll even give you this free color printer to print your valentine rejections on!Audience: No way!Announcer: That’s right, this stylish printer can print in two colors: black and white. That’s a $100 value, yours absolutely free!Audience: *gasp*Announcer: How much could you expect to pay for this incredible package?Audience: $1,000?Announcer: NO!Audience: $500?Announcer: NO!Audience: $250?Announcer: NO! Not even $250! Because right now you can get this incredible, life-changing program (plus color printer) for only FIVE easy payments of $49.95!Audience: Amazing!Announcer: So call 1-800-2-REJECT. CALL NOW!Audience: Yeah!

Do any of you have a similar problem when attempting to post on other forums with a rich text editor? I haven't had this problem on any other forums, but none of those used a rich text editor, so I don't know. I was just wondering if it's a bug with BZPower or with the forum software.-don't touch my pocket protector

All those monster sets look like B-rate horror movies. I love it! I'd actually have to say that my favorite is the cheapo Swamp Creature set. The scene it depicts is pulled strait out of a dozen cheezy horror movies. Heck, I've got seven bucks. I might pick it up.-don't touch my pocket protector

Really neat. I <3 the creeper fig, and all those tiles and 1x1 bricks will be great for MOCs. Really, it's Minecraft and Lego Bricks, how could it go wrong?-don't touch my pocket protector

Hmm, it's probably a bug with the editor rather than something with your browser, then. Although you could still type in code mode since most of the functions are super basic and easy to remember. The only exceptions are the fonts, colors, and emotes, which you can just switched back to for.Also, don't use your tab key, it screws with the program. That could help as well.-don't touch my pocket protector

Valentine’s Day Special Announcer: Happy Valentine’s Day!Audience: And to you, too!Announcer: Do you want to show that someone special how much they mean to you?Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Do you want them to love you forever?Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Do you want to give them a valentine, but you’re just not man enough to do it?Woman in second row: Hey! Women send valentines, too!Woman in sixth row: Yeah!Woman in third row: Totally!Announcer: Oh just shut up and play with your Lego Friends!Audience: GASP! We’ll sue!Well-Dressed Lawyer: Sir, this is a court order, if you would come with me please…[several multi-million dollar settlements later]Announcer: Happy Valentine’s Day!Audience: And to you, too!Announcer: Do you want to show that someone special how much they mean to you?Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Do you want them to love you forever?Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Do you want to give them a valentine, but you’re just not…erm…person...enough to do it? [looks at Well-Dressed Lawyer][Well-Dressed Lawyer give a thumbs up]Audience: Yeah!Announcer: Then you need BZP-tine!Audience: Ah!Announcer: Here, take a look:Announcer: These high-quality BZPower-themed valentines can be sent through the mail, through BZPower, or faxed like Fax-O-Power!Audience: Yay, versatility!Announcer: Just take a look at some examples:Audience: Ah!Announcer: But what if you don’t have the creativity to write a heart-filled letter? Well we’ve got the answer for you with our pre-written letters!Audience: All right!Announcer: Instead of working slavishly to compose an original note, just use one of the cheesy love poems that we’ve shamelessly copied from somebody else! It’s not romanticism, it’s plagerism!Audience: Yay!Well-Dressed Lawyer: *coughcough*Announcer: Uh, but don’t worry, we’ve only copied from people who have died more than 70 years ago so the copyright has expired. So unlike most of our products, it’s totally legal!Audience: Sweet!Announcer: So call 1-800-LUV-4-YOU and order your BZPower Valentines today!Audience: DO IT!Announcer: But wait, there’s more!Audience: GASP!Announcer: If you call right now, we’ll send you a full two-dozen valentines!Audience: No way!Announcer: Send all of these out! There’s no way you can strike out 24 times, even if you do have a wart on your nose!Man in front row with wart on nose: Hey!Announcer: So what are you waiting for?Audience: CALL NOW!!!

George Lucas is never done screwing with his masterpiece. The question is if Lego will stop screwing with his masterpiece. I don't think so, but that may not be a bad thing. Because of the success of Lego Star Wars, we've seen sets of things that were barely seen in the movies, if at all. This extended license will give Lego the freedom to delve into some of the extended universe of Star Wars and give us something new.Or they could just use it to make a dozen more Millennium Falcons.-don't touch my pocket protector

If you're only trying to get the Fellowship minifigs, then E-bay is your friend.As for these sets, they're kind of steep. I might pick one or two of them up, but only if I can find a good price. Anyway, next year they will absolutely have to make a Mines of Moria set with the Baldrog, as well as Minas Tirith, Rivendell, and Bag End. Oh, and Mount Doom. As for Tom Bombadil, I don't really miss him. To be honest, Tom Bombadil was my least favorite part of the entire Hobbit+LotR cycle.-don't touch my pocket protector