Some Random Phrase

OOC: What do you mean by that? If you mean that was a cool move, thanks. IC: Shadowstalker Shadowstalker somehow twisted his body to avoid most of the damage, but the swords give him a nasty gash in one of teh fingers of his mechanical arm. He unsheathed his sword.

IC: Shadowstalker Shadowstalker noticed teh Toa's actions. Eyes concentrated, clenched fists, single center of attention... It all added up to one thing. Shadowstalker hurled himself forward in a movement reminicent of a lunging Muaka cat, he twirled and threw the knife with uncanny accuracy at the Toa's mask, hoping to split it down the center.

You should change the gender-ratio. I got three female Matoran in a row...

This seems interesting, and while I'm not a big fan of the show, (They portray the Eagles as horrible in combat with the exception of Eris and a couple others, and show that their jets are super-weak in comparison to a heli that was dreamed up in a matter of weeks by a tribe that isn't usually displayed as mechanically competent and can't even natually fly...), I like Chima, especially when you build out from the TV show's lack of coherancy and make it into something good. So I'll be popping in to see how this goes, and offering ideas now and then.

IC: Shadowstalker Shadowstalker grinned behind the tinted faceplate. Wasn't the first time unexpected things happened that were useful to him. He leaped off the tree, catching onto a cable attached to a rising elevator, and readied his throwing knife.

This is great! I gave it some clicks, and it works well. If I need to make some names anytime soon, I'll use this.

IC:Shadowstalker Shadowstalker had made a grave error. He should've recognized that that was a De-Toa. As the pulse struck him, he lost grip. His talons syaed in for a moment, giving him enough time to clumsily grab on again. He stayed there for a moment, allowing hearing to return to him, and then began to acend acrobatically, pulling a throwing knife out of his belt.

IC: Shadowstalker As soon as he was sighted, the Skakdi leaped straight off of the platform. As he plummeted, he flicked out the talons on his mechanical arm and stabbed them into a tree trunk. As soon as he got to a stop, he got some better footing and began climbing upward silently. Normally, Shadowstalker would've run away, but he was supremely bored, and this Toa seemed interesting to watch.

I activate a hidden function in the Moonship and it turns into a mech suit. I use it to beat up Starscream and take teh mask. My Mask.

IC:Shadowstalker Shadowstalker noticed the Toa from eairlier talking with another Skakdi. He hung back, listening.

Zaktan: I don't think you have much to say here, Toa Hothead.

I reinforce my faceplate with bulletproof glass. I beat you up with a club. My mask.

You mess up the Graviton Manipulator, and are crushed. I put on a spacesuit and repair the Moonship. My mask.

IC:Shadowstalker Shadowstalker was mostly sane, but there were a couple things that would divert in his thought processes. Being nearly spotted was one of them. The Skakdi went into another elevator, and hit the button for ascent. He adjusted his helmet's faceplate as he went up.

I am in the Moonship, which is covered in weapons... I beat up your army and take the mask. My mask and Moonship.

As I can't think of a good one: Turrahk: SCREECH *Zaps Kiina*

IC: Shadowstalker Shadowstalker landed behind a tree trunk, peeking around the corner. He looked at Le-Koro's elevator's and noticed a couple beings getting into one. He activated his thermal imaging and watched, intrigued. OOC: Open for interaction.

I shoot cruise missiles at you. My Mask

IC: Shadowstalker Shadowstalker swung through the trees, keeping an eye out for beings.

The powers are not Toa-level. The blaster boosts his blasts up to a Su-Toa's normal blast, but it can only fire bolts.

*cracks knuckles* Alright, I'm myself, and I'll be your second staff reviewer. As it stands, I can't approve this. The flaws aren't drastic, but this is going to need some reworking before I can allow it. Most of these flaws link, in some way, to the Lunite armor. First of all, you don't mention what Lunite is, and I can't seem to find any reference to it (Marvel or otherwise) using Professor Google. I'm going to need to be able to understand what the material is before I can allow it. Second, his weaknesses; The time it takes the armor to appear isn't a weakness, as you note earlier that it takes seconds for it to arrive. His powers as a whole aren't very balanced. The armor grants; -Flight -Strength -Durability on par with the Iron Man armors -Bolts of the Power Cosmic That last one I can't allow at all; The Power Cosmic, in every one of its known users, has been wildly OP, and the effects range from user to user, so it's not possible to understand what it would even do in this case. If you were to cut out the Power Cosmic, the powers of the suit would most likely be fine. What does not work, however, is the way the backstory plays into things. First of all, you don't explain at all what the suit is or where it came from. And since there isn't really human activity of note on the moon, that's an even bigger thing to consider. We've approved similar tech, but always with a solid explanation for it. Next, the part where he simply finds the bracelet could use a bit of reworking as well, particularly with regards to why SHIELD would recruit an underaged operative. Lastly... It's highly unlikely that a sixteen year old who grew up in an orphanage would be a black belt at sixteen. It's not even really possible to be a black belt at sixteen in anything except commercialized, Americanized martial arts, which tend to be much less effective anyway. This character is an interesting idea, but I'm really going to need some things fixed, and some concepts fleshed out before I can approve it. I see almost all of your points, and I agree. I didn't think about some of these, didn't know about a couple others, and knew about one, but failed to clarify. Lunite is only a name for the armor. The 'seconds' thing I meant to mean half a minute, though that can be changed to a whole minute. Or two. I didn't know about the OPness of Power Cosmic, so that aspect of the armor shall be changed to energy bolts. As for the backstory about the armor, I was intending that that was old alien tech. I agree that that is a very weak part of the profile. He didn't go straght into an orphanage. The fire happened to him around 14. He found the bracelet one day in the typical cliche mannar. I agree that that is also a weak point. As for the SHIELD part, you are completely correct. That will be removed from the profile. As for the kung fu, I must disagree with you there. I myself am about three belts away from black belt in Shaolin Kung Fu and am a number of years away from 16. Also I said he was almost a black belt, not that he is one. I will edit the profile as soon as you get back to me. If it still has issues, I think I'll scrap this profile and use a charecter whom I have fleshed out much more. If I do end up doing that, could I ask you if nanorobots are allowed?

IC: Shadowstalker Looking supremely bored, Shadowstalker walked out of the training center and immediately took to the trees, becoming all but invisible in the foliage.

IC: Draft A Vortixx walked into Onu-Koro, looking very puzzled. He had recently crash-landed here, and was hoping to find a means of transportation that didn't involve fickle flight boots. His armor clacked and clanked as he looked around.

My Moonship detects me within Kopaka's Kool Kompanion's walls, and beams me up. Repairing me with a temporal reconstruction device, it scans for teh real mask and launches several cruise missiles. I teleport to the mask long enough to take it, and get away seconds before the cruise missiles hit. My mask.

The time when Teridax usurped control of the Brotherhood and teh Makuta became officially evil.