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I think I'm starting to remember why I stopped making political statements and being outspoken with my beliefs online. Unless someone is explicitly asking you, or they're going to a discussion/reading an article/otherwise intentionally engaging you specifically to hear your opinion, the most you're going to do is preach to your choir and get angry people yelling incoherently at you who ignore any logic and sources, and counter it with false/debunked information, endless emotional pleas, or strawman scapegoats with no basis in reality. So many otherwise-reasonable, intelligent people have a complete inability to look at something as not being black-and-white, and an utter refusal to even consider for a second that they could be wrong and the other guy might be right. It's not worth the headache, especially over the internet. You're engaging someone who is, at best, going to shirk away and avoid you, and at worst, they're going to start stalking you and pointing out every time you screw up. If they're not specifically looking to hear what you have to say, be it by following you on bookface or bumblr or tweetybird or anything else, or by specifically asking you, all getting into a discussion with them will do is start a fight. There are no civil debates on the internet anymore, just yelling matches, except instead of volume being important, since there's no volume in text, now the winner is decided by who uses the most words(Bigger words are better too, so make certain that when pontificating on the subject matter that you're particularly and overbearingly loquacious and indulgent) I still believe what I believe, and if you ask me or read my blog or anything else specifically looking for my opinion, you're going to get it. I'm not going to shove it at people, but on an outlet specifically to allow me to express such opinions, or when explicitly asked to share them, I will divulge them. But I'm done fighting with people that refuse to hear anything but "you're right, sir or madam. I was truly a fool to disagree. Thank you for showering me with your intellect." and I'm done trying to change people's minds by admonishing them and trying to force reality down their throat. It doesn't work. And please, read the tags before commenting. I know how applicable this is to stuff that's been happening here, but it is not referring to anything on here. I swear.

Yeah, there's a reason I try to avoid liking or commenting on controversial/political stuff on Facebook or in real life. Sometimes even mentioning a politician or other authority figure in a favorable light is enough to rile somebody up. And frankly, I'd rather avoid a lot of that kind of drama. The only really political issues I might bring up are ones that I feel really shouldn't be up for political debate in the first place, like disability advocacy or various science-related topics. And even those I am a bit cautious about sometimes.

I thought that Bionicle had garbage gender ratios was an accepted fact at this point. It is, in fact, the most moderate thing that can be said on the issue. Apparently I was wrong. (this is in reference to something off-site, not any of the topics I have posted in.)

Sadly, nothing related to gender, or race, or nationality, or any of the various other things that divide the people of the world is an accepted fact in all corners of the internet. There are always going to be people who are wrong about those kinds of things. You can't let it get you down. Though, to be fair, Chima's gender ratios ARE "very good" as far as most LEGO themes are concerned. Do they still need to improve? Of course! But compared to previous themes like Ninjago and even BIONICLE they strike me as a step in the right direction and a sign that the LEGO Group is learning. I like that. I like seeing indications that people and companies can learn from their mistakes. Sometimes the learning comes in small steps, but I'm still happy to see that as long as they're steps in the right direction.

I don't know what specific thing you're referring to, but just in general what I've seen in the LEGO fandom, in other sites as well as this one, occasionally, leads me to believe some people in it are ignorant as to what a good gender ratio actually is. Just today I saw somebody say that Chima's gender ratio (of one female for every six males) was apparently "very good"--and that's even worse than Bionicle's was, at least for the first couple of years. So yeah, I imagine that discussion of Bionicle's gender ratio can get pretty dumb.

So I don`t really define myself with technicalities, or at least I try not to. I also try and grant the same perspective to other people because that`s just how my mind has always worked. There is a member in my family that has different needs than most people. I never really realized it until that family member met briefly with a childhood friend of mine. I had always just thought of that person as another member of the family. "Yes, that person acts differently, but Mom acts differently than Dad. Mom is Mom, Dad is Dad, and this person is this person" That was how my mind worked as a child. I like to think I carry a fraction of that mentality with me even today, though honestly I have no clue if that's the case. I know it`s not always easy to believe other people when they say "I know what it's like to be..." You can never just trust anyone else with your opinions, especially when you feel so personally and so strongly about that one trait that you relate with. People build morals, ideals and their very identityies around those sorts of things. How can anyone trust someone else with something so personal? Even so, I still try to get some sort of message across. Just here and there mostly, but I just want everyone to stay calm and think important aspects of their lives over rationally. It doesn`t sound like a lot, but sometimes people just can`t be rational or calm. They`re too proud, too stubborn or they have something that just means so much to them that they won`t ever consider taking their ideals lightly. And that`s fine, I guess. I am only 22 years old as of right now. So, what have I learned? Things change. I used to be a bratty kid with a hot temper. Then I was a miserable adolescent dealing with depression on my own. Now I`ve gone through treatment and I`m actually more or less content with my life. Sure, things aren`t perfect, but nothing ever is. That`s life I guess. But I`ve also learned that, yeah, I am different. Now, I don`t really have a label for myself that I fully appreciate, and I don`t keep up with personality studies, though I have taken a couple. (DISC - I think I was an I\C? Myers Briggs says I`m an INFJ). Ever since I was a kid, I grew up overweight. I know it`s not the most tragic thing you`ve ever heard, and yeah I am responsible for my own life choices and it`s not something that someone`s born with. That`s just how I was and still am. And yeah, I got bullied for it. I never got beat up, but throughout my schooling I would be a target for teasing. Some kids would hug me out of curiosity and tell their friends it was like hugging a big marshmallow. My bad temper didn`t help me any either. The more I reacted, the more it happened. I ended up just shutting up and ignoring people around me. That was a pretty unhealthy way to deal with it looking back now. When I went through my depression in highschool and college, it took me forever to finally come to terms with the fact there was something wrong with me, and even then it took me longer to actually tell my family. I hated that I was different. I didn`t feel comfortable in my own skin. I would go for walks after school and other kids (while sometimes meaning no harm) would make comments. I never lost my temper despite being quiet. I wanted to fight. I wanted to punch. I wanted to scream. But I put all of that aside. It never got any better. At least by ignoring they could have their fun and then get bored. That was just the way I was. That was just the way life is. You can spend a lifetime reasoning the ramifications of bullying, but ultimately it will still happen. That was just how my life worked. They were them and I was me. I had to deal with it alone. That was just the way it was. Anyway, as bad as things could get sometimes, I always told myself I was lucky. I have a good family, I have my health (more or less =P) and I have reasons to be happy, even if I wasn`t happy all of the time. Well, I don`t know if any of you guys have dealt with being overweight. I don`t even know if any of you can relate even a little bit to what I`ve said so far. Still, I think that no matter who you are or what you do, there will always be someone who tells you who you are and what you are capable of. When I was in college studying to become a baker, a student in the culinary program told me right to my face that no matter how hard I worked I would never find a job (And he was so stuck up about it that I wanted to punch him. Still, I was set to ignore, so that didn`t happen). I think we will be told our place in the world many times before we die. That`s the world. That`s just the way it works. But that doesn`t mean you can`t do anything. That doesn`t mean it doesn`t get better. Yes, I am still overweight. Yes, people around me still take notice. Yes I can be treated differently because of it. But for the first time in my life I feel comfortable in my own skin. I am 22 and I am employed as a baker. Not only that, but my bosses actually want to keep me around. Go figure. I have no idea what the people who made fun of me or told me who I was are up to now. I honestly don`t care. Karma could punish them, or they could be super rich and popular. It makes no difference to me. I like myself the way I am, and yes, I am imperfect. Yes, I should lose weight and I should probably work on my own personal identity more than I have in the past. But honestly? Right now I'm just glad with who I am. And I know my story doesn`t end here. I`m going to change a lot over the years. That`s what life does. That`s the way it works. I say bring it on.

You know I've always tried to be an honest person. And while I'm certainly not perfect at it I'd like to think I've done an okay job. Except with one person, myself. I've denied the truth about myself, subconsciously or otherwise. Thinking back I realise I've been doing this for years, probably since 9th grade. I'd tell myself day by day that was completely comfortable with who I was, what I believed, and that I didn't care what others thought of me. That I always acted like me even if it got me weird looks or if I got called a 'freak' or a 'goofball' or whatever the ###### they came up with. I could roll with the punches, laugh at almost everything said about me, and tell everyone I didn't care what people thought of me. That I wasn't going to conform to make other people around me happy. Well, as a certain Tyler so elegantly put it once, I'm a moron. I cared what people thought of me, I still care what people think of me. I can tell myself all day long that I don't but that's just not true. I do. I want to be liked and loved just like any other human being. What people say about me does affect how I act, what I say, and probably even what I think. Sure, I've always kept up the facade that I couldn't care less what people would say, and maybe sometimes I really didn't, but the truth of the matter that every insult, compliment, or criticism affects me in some way or another. I may laugh it off or just act indifferent but inside it still hurts. I love getting attention, especially the center of it and I'd probably say any stupid thing to get it. I've always been the cheerful, generally optimistic, carefree person that I've expected myself to be. That's okay, it's part of who I am, it's not something I can just change, or would ever want to. I've done a pretty good job of maintaining that over the years, but on the inside I feel things that I rarely, if ever speak of, even to myself. I hate yelling, no I'm not talking about your everyday yell of alarm or trying to get someone's attention. I'm talking about that deep, loud, terrifying blood curdling scream that only the grouchiest, meanest of people can summon from their throats. Well, hello to my late grandfather, who I lived with till I was about 13. Now I loved my grandfather, but the man had anger issues like no one I've ever met since. And naturally who was the person who was on the receiving end of this howling? Well if he and my dad weren't busy screaming at each other it was me. I probably don't need to say it sucked. Kind of makes you feel like fleeing in terror and hiding where no one can find you. I don't even know why I'm talking about this, maybe I just need too. I tend to act like I'm not afraid of anything, truth is I feel absolutely terrified on some level. It might not come out every day, or even every week, but it's there somewhere. I'm afraid that people won't like me, hate me, think the things I enjoy are stupid, and I'm pretty sure I could cry if the right person decided to start screaming at me. It used to happen all the time. For a guy who's pretty much declared war against conformity, I'm pretty guilty of it. I've conformed for friends, strangers, my parents, pretty much everyone. So to really start changing all that I'm just going to flat out admit something. I'm genderfluid. Since around my early teens I've been obsessed with the idea of being a woman, I don't think a single day has gone by since then that I haven't at least thought about it once. For a long time I've kept that mostly to myself, sometimes I've wondered if something's wrong with me, or if I need help. I don't even want to think about how my parents would react if they knew how I felt. Well, I'm pretty much sick and tired of hiding it. So I've decided to just outright admit it. I'm genderfluid, might even be a transsexual I don't know. All I know is I've needed to admit it for long time. It's taken me years to get the guts to do this, and you guys were a large part of it, especially my peeps on Skype. <3 So there, my darkest secret is out, yay. God...I'm actually posting this.

First off, thanks for all of those nice comments on my last entry. ^^ They were really sweet. AND NOW TO STOP WITH EMOTIONALLY DRAINING BLOG ENTRIES AND BACK TO SUPER IMPORTANT IRREVERENCE AND TOMFOOLERY! Anyway, I finally watched the bonus content for Frozen today (after I rewatched the movie. Still fabulous by the way. I hope the creators keep doing movies because I thoroughly enjoyed their works thus far). I am soooo glad they didn't make Elsa the villain. Every other rendition of The Snow Queen I've seen thus far has made The Snow Queen the villain. She was not the big bad in the original stories, folks. She was just a lonely ethereal spirit that kidnapped a child thus making his loved ones think he was dead. Because, you know, protagonists totally do those things. Currently ending my day listening to Let It Go. That song is the reason Elsa wasn't made a villain by the way. Amazing how such a simple element can change the tone of an entire story. GET OFF MY ICE PALACE! ~Tekulo <3

Guess who finally saw The Lego Movie?

Today marks the 10th anniversary of Code Lyoko's first broadcast in the US. The episode was Teddygozilla, and it was weird. I didn't know about it at first. I'm not sure exactly when I discovered it, but I remember the scene that introduced me: Odd was fighting a Blok in the Forest sector. He jumped over it and shot it and it blew up. It was just on TV and it looked cool. I'm really glad I found it when I did. This show was my late childhood. Finding out there was going to be a second season was a huge deal. I lost track of it a bit in season 3 I think, but season 4 got me back into it. It's a shame the execs at CN screwed it up so much.

Matoro. See, it's funny because his character died around six years before the movie came out =3

In chrome, if you right click a picture then press S you can do a reverse image of it.

Mistake on my part, I meant to say it searches for the image (maybe I'm wrong there too). Love the results though.

(Well, this is kind of off-topic, but: Chima really only does good with the amount of women in the theme when you look at the numbers--very, very few themes can boast 8 female characters in minifigures. As a percentage of the overall number however (~56 this summer) it definitely isn't any better than most themes with actual characters, which typically have smallish groups with one token female character. I wish Chima was getting better at this, but sadly the inclusion of females in Chima has been not only small, but static (with only 2 introduced every wave regardless of how large the group of characters is) and when they exist, they are extremely poorly distributed, with seven out of the eight being exclusive to whatever set they first appeared in--in most cases, a very expensive one, which renders most of them invisible to the casual consumer.)

This is my favorite physics, but it took me a while before I really understood it. What parts are particularly troubling you? As for more intuitive ways to think about it, sometimes thinking of bras and kets as vectors helps, but I think grasping them in an abstract way is most beneficial, and its that transition to the abstract understanding that can be particularly difficult.

This entry is so true. -Rez

Remember when this was what Lego blasters looked like?

OH MY GOD THAT IS WOAH WOOOAAAHH Reminds me a lot of Amnesia, though you can actually defend yourself with something. The lag on the scope display is just... I think it's the most brilliant thing I saw in this trailer, because in a game this tense with enemies that appear to be pretty fast, that lag is just infuriating and terrifying. Robots are the best, this looks super cool. I will never play it 'cause I'm a baby and survival/horror games spooky me too much, but it looks super cool. I'll definitely go over to sit in a dark room and watch my friends play it, though.

I saw that, it's reeeaaally confusing. Why were they getting so defensive about it? Were they trying to deny it? Sheesh. The internet truly is amazing.

This morning, or rather, afternoon, I woke up two hours after my five hour class ended Basically overslept by like 9 hours. This isn't the first time I accidentally slept right through a class, but it's definitely the longest I overslept by. I remember setting my alarm so obviously at some point I woke up and turned off all handful of my alarms one by one, completely delirious. I'm so mad, that's so many hours I could've been working. I didn't even go to bed that late, it was like, the earliest I went to sleep this week. It was like 3 AM, but still. Come on. That's nothing. Whatever, the class wasn't that important. Ugh. Finals stress is really stressful and stressing me out so I'm really stressed out about everything. Way too much to do in my last week. My girlfriend helps me relax and feel better about all that stuff and I'm really grateful for that, but the timezone difference is a big part of why I go to sleep so late so that just goes back to the first issue. Oh well. Almost done with the semester, I'm kickin' into maximum overdrive, and I'm gonna get everything done and hope for the best, and then pack my things and fly over to see her. And I will sleep so much.

My shortest classes are 3 hours long, Digital Video, Art History, and Writing. Animation is a 5 hour class, and Drawing is 6. I have 9 hours of straight class on Wednesdays, and at first it seemed terrible but I got so used to it that my regular 8 hour work days just fly right by now I function just fine on no sleep, I skip sleeping entirely at least once a week. Coffee is my saving grace. My work load really is intense, yeah

You know Tekulo's serious when his text stops being green and he doesn't tell you to get off his lawn. In all seriousness, I truly don't know what you're going through. I've been lucky enough to avoid many of the things you're going through. And while I have dealt with depression, and have probably had my own share of problems which YOU haven't dealt with, it doesn't stop me from envying the strength I see in you and in others who deal with problems I can't comprehend on a daily basis. You're an inspiration. So congrats on your new outlook on life. While a positive attitude can't solve all of life's problems (anyone who says otherwise has something to sell you), it does generally make them a little more bearable.

obligatory

i may be late to the party (and I may or may not have consumed all available previously existant alcoholic beverages present at aforementioned shindig), but that doesn't mean i can't proffer the host a well deserved toast to self-discovery, Nate's continual bonheur, and an appropriately amiable reception also cats

This post... CALLS FOR THE HIGHEST OF FIVES <3 u

How did I miss this entry? As a fellow Nate, you've got my support. I'm glad you were not only able to find a way to define yourself that feels right, but also that you were brave enough to share it.

This entry made me wish I could shed a manly tear and shake your hand. Takuma Nuva

hats

I miss these.

Oh no. Oh no. Oh nooooooo