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Kaleidoscope Tekulo

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Blog Entries posted by Kaleidoscope Tekulo

  1. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Wish me luck folks.  There's gonna be a meeting tomorrow with me included about how I'm bad at my job.  Such highlights will be "I can't single-handedly bake everything by myself for the entire weekend"  and "We need to hire a new employee.  We have been down an assistant since May." And that's not to discredit "The reason I can't do as much as my manager is because they have over thirty years of experience in this job.  I haven't been with this company for a single year and the other jobs I have had in this field have been very different."
     
    Let this be a lesson, kids.  Don't get a job in a high stress industry.  Maybe don't get a job at all and become a nomad.  
     
    But enough about my life being a mildly annoying train wreck that shouts a deadpan "nooooooooooooo" as said train mildly bumps into a tree with a subtle hiccup that merely unnerves its passengers. What's going on with y'all?
     
     
  2. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    owo

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    I'm still around.  Kinda.  Definitely probably still here.  
     
    I got a sunburn the other day.  I was helping with yardwork. 
     
    I ordered a new phone which should be in tomorrow. 
     
    Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
     
    I had a dream earlier in the week about my late dog.  She was in my bed and we were hanging out like old times.  It was good to see her again. 
     
    Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
     
    Bonkles r rad
     
    knock knock
    who's there?
    Botar?
    Botar who?
    Exactly.
     
    Well that's about all.  
     
    ~Tekulo <3
  3. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Very few places still make desserts and breads from scratch these days.  And even the ones that do use some cheats like cake mixes, icing that gets shipped in buckets or just factory made products.
     
    Baking from scratch to me seems to be a bit of a lost art.  In my entire career I've worked in three locations that made everything from scratch.  In all of those locations I was the only baker/pastry chef and the workload was always demanding.  It can be a lot for one person to run a bakery alone.  At my first job, my position was terminated and the company went with factory made products as opposed to scratch made products.  
     
    It was disheartening.
     
    Nowadays I work in a grocery store, where nothing is made from scratch.  Everything comes in frozen, from bread doughs to cakes to cookie dough, etc.  And these products?  They don't hold a candle to the work I've done in the past.  And that's not because I'm an especially skilled baker, though I did build up my skill set over time.  No, it was simply because I took the time to bake the products with care.
     
    Baking isn't that difficult.  It is an exact science a lot of the time, and yes there are some projects much more involved than others, but overall things like italian bread, chocolate chip cookies or a fruit tart don't take an especially great amount of skill to achieve.  All anyone needs is a recipe, the proper ingredients (butter in place of crisco for example), some equipment and the time to bake.  
     
    It always saddens me these days to see so many people buying, frankly, inferior products at the grocery store.  People pay good money for birthday cakes that come in frozen, probably loaded with preservatives and topped with icing that comes from a box and gets water added to it.  And frankly it's overly sweet and addicting.  I just find it sad because here we have a special occasion and people celebrate with garbage food.  I've made cakes with flavor other than just sugar.  It's so much better, I find, to taste butter, real butter, in buttercream icing.  
     
    I know I must sound like a snob, but when I studied at culinary school I created and tasted some of the finest patisserie in my life.  I try to keep that alive every now and then too.  But in the food industry, the things we treat ourselves to just aren't worth the calories when they come from the store.  
     
    Anyway, that's just my random thought of the day.  
  7. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    I've been watching the new Ducktales.  It has some pretty good moments in it and I find it very charming.
     
    Also Steven Universe Future has aired four episodes and they are very good.  They deal with aspects of the show I've been dying to see for a long time.
     
    Other than that, work has been stressful.  I feel like I'm screwing up a lot, but that comes with being new to a job.  I'm increasingly unsure if baking is something I want to be doing for the rest of my life.  I'm also still unsure of what I'd be doing instead.
     
    On the romance front, I'm still single, but that's ok.  I think after a few life events I've kinda cooled off from being a jopeless romantic and recognize there's a lot more to relationships than just pining after someone.  I've read a few books on the subject that I think helped give me more perspective on things.  
     
     
  8. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Maybe 2020 will be a good year.
     
    2019 for me was just a lot of surviving and recovery.  I'd just like some peace in the new year.  
     
    2019 wasn't all bad.  Even some of the more challenging moments lead to some good things this year.  I know a little more about myself now.
     
    This was the first year I didn't go to pride adter going two years a row to the Seattle pride parade.  I'm back in Ohio now and Pride isn't really celebrated in my hometown.  This next year I should really get a ride to the city.   I'm thinking of dying my hair blue or maybe pink again.
     
    This year I got to go on a couple of vacations which was nice.  Though they weren't without their fair share of drama.
     
    I got to see some old friends this holiday season and I'm going to see more of them soon.  That is one thing I do like about being home; getting to see everyone.  But I don't see friends too often these days.  I wish I could meet some LGBTQ friendly folks.
     
    I'm not staying up til midnight tonight.   I work early tomorrow morning.  
     
    Happy new year, everyone!  Be safe and I'll see you around.
     
    ~Tekulo
  10. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Hello and welcome back to Late @ Night With Tekulo!  Yes, that's always been the title of this show.
    After episode one was a rousing success, and popular demand, we are here on episode 2!
    During this holiday season, work has been keeping me busy.  On my days off, however, I feel a bit of unease.  There really isn't much to do here in my hometown.  I have no local friends, no means to get out of the house and really no place to go hang out if I could get out anyway.  I find myself missing living on my own and being more independent.  Sure I took the bus to work, but it was still a good year up until the end.  I used to go for walks, was surrounded by people I thought were friends, but I haven't spoken to them since I left.  Now I'm left with memories of being happy tainted by my own mistakes and regrets.
    But hey, that's in the past.  I'm sure I have lots to look forward to.  Like being alone forever stuck in my hometown where I'm too afraid to dye my hair or wear fun clothing.  
    Right now I'm honestly just surviving.  I feel completely adrift with no idea where to go from here.  
    And yet my story continues...
  11. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Welcome to the Tekulo show!  A show where I answer any question from any audience member!  (The audience is you, dear reader!)
     
    I'm totally not just doing this to waste time on my day off work.  So ask away!
     
    (AMA?  That's not a real thing)
  12. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
     
    Edit:  Still alive here.
     
    Sorry for the screaming, I just remembered the blogs exist this morning and I only had a minute before I started work to make an entry for old times sake.  Given the short time I had, I feel it was good.  
     
    Anyway, uhhhhhhhh stuff has been happening.  I got a job, quit that job and then got another job.  The second job seems good so far.  I actually get to take breaks this time lol.  
     
    Anyway, how has everyone been?
  14. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Keeping this susinct, I moved back to Ohio for medical reasons. I had a second mental breakdown, failed to set up proper doctors at the West Coast, and I had to pack up, move and say goodbye in less than a day (which wasn't easy on two different levels).
     
    I'm going through a long and expensive process of getting a new diagnosis. I am on new meds now. Some professionals seem to think I'm bipolar. We'll see.
     
    So yeah I was reckless with my health, I was overworked and constantly making overtime, and by the end of one sour week I was jobless, homeless, and wound up working with a charity and then later transferred from two separate hospitals to a behavioral health center (which was actually probably one of the most helpful places I'd visited for me to sort things out).
     
    So yeah, kinda heavy news here. I would like to say the last thing I need right now is pity. I always felt annoyed when people just say "I'm sorry" to this sort of thing when they don't know what else to say. I know I'm guilty of that too, but some of my favorite responses have been words of wisdom, or gentle encouragement, or even from some of my closest friends just saying "I love you and I'm here for you," or something to that effect.
     
    I've been plenty scolded by nurses and a few other people in my life (with very much good advice, to their credit).
     
    So all that aside I've been reaching out to old friends in Ohio. I've been cleaning my room from adolescence and doing my best to ignore the news. It's one step at a time.
     
    I was missing my friends from the west earlier, but I realized all of those friendships and bonds were made in the past three years. I'm still in contact with a lot of friends, and I'm still in my mid twenties. I have so much longer than three years left, and if I can build myself a happy social life in three years, then well... who knows? This chapter of my life is part of the adventure. It may seem like a step backwards, but life doesn't stop, even for these kinds of events.
     
    I dunno. The glass is kinda at an equillibrium to me at this point.
     
    ~Tekulo♡
  15. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    Pride

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    Hey everyone! Been a while.
     
    Life's been keeping me busy with work, walks, family visiting, the occasional (very occasional) trip to Seattle and procrastination on things that are important that I should be doing right now. I got about... five(?) hours of sleep last night and I'm at the end of my day so boy howdy that is a thing. XP (meanwhile someone out there reading this is on no sleep for the past three days and is screaming at their computer screen right now).
     
    There's a lot I could put in a life update entry, and I might just get around to that at a later time. Right now, I want to talk a bit about pride month.
     
    So yesterday I watched a candlelight vigil for the victims of a certain incident (which idk if I can talk specifically about here). But yeah... hearing multiple names and ages of victims being called out and realizing you fall into the same minority and age group is... sure a strange feeling. I've had people tell me that these are just isolated incidents and that it's not going to happen to me, to stop stressing out, but... hehehe it's not like anyone can predict the future and honestly the world is a wild place. News about violence against LGBT people is always a hard truth to face. Well, for me it is anyway.
     
    BUT ANYWAY ONTO LESS DEPRESSING SHENANIGANS!
     
    So, a while ago I started identifying as genderqueer. That was because I had no better term to describe my gender identity, really. I've talked a bit about it on here before. Well, recently I learned about demigenders. I looked up the definition of demigirl and I kinda realized that was closest to describing how I personally identify. After I read the definition, really read it, I kinda stopped for a second and... you know how you follow a really good mystery story? Like right towards the end when everything starts to come together and make sense and you see the solution at the end of it, you get like these goosebumps and a strange sense of excitement and trepidation? That's how I felt when I realized this was describing me. Genderqueer had always been a bit of a vague shrug for me. It's nice having a more precise label imo.
     
    So, for those not aware, demigirl is a gender identity where someone identifies partially as female, but not completely. For some people they identify as primarily female and partly as something else, but not always.
     
    Personally I don't think I feel physical dysphoria, or at least not to the point where I'd want to undergo hrt.
     
    So, what does this mean for me? Well, it means I'm the same person I always was. Now I just have a label for myself that I feel comfortable with. And actually, for me it's a relief. Even if a lot of people aren't going to understand me with my gender identity, just knowing that there are other people out there that identify in similar ways to me... it's comforting to know I'm not the freak I told myself I was growing up. I know I'm not cis and I'm not in the majority or anything, but... I dunno, I feel more like a normal human being now than I have in years (and this after I've dyed my hair, worn cute necklaces, got my ears pierced and went through all these little things that guys just didn't do where I grew up).
     
    I'm still good with he/him pronouns btw. I'm generally okay with feminine pronouns and things too, provided they aren't used as a means to ridicule me through misgendering (i.e. calling me a girl in a way meant as a demeaning insult. Yes, people still do this, and no it isn't funny. Hasn't been funny to me for a while now tbh).
     
    So yeah. Demigirl, demihomosexual and very tired from a long day of work and a long many years of trying to figure all of this out.
     
    This is who I am.
     
    Happy Pride Month! <3
    ~Tekulo
  16. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Gathered friends,
     
    It is with a heavy heart that I must inform you all of the passing of Akano: Toa of Electricity. You know, this dorkus. He was found on a beach this morning somewhere in Australia. As to what he was doing there, there is strong evidence of a kangaroo boomerang war with sharks and lazerbeams. It is believed Akano bravely fought off twelve sharks, six kangaroos, five platypuses and a duck before succumbing to a deadly splinter from a boomerang accident. Truly a tragedy.
     
    Many will remember Akano for his comic series here on BZPower, truly the only noteworthy thing he has ever done with his life ever. Others may remember him for his physics lectures on his blog, but let's be honest, only nerds pay attention to those. It is a travesty that such legacies shall never be continued. He was also probably like one minifigure away from completing the latest wave of blind bags too.
     
    From a young age, Akano has always had an interest in science. He would place string on an ice cube and then add salt to perform the darkest of sorcery known to man. He was always eager to learn and would never shut up when he learned something he thought was interesting. I mean, I have learned things just by knowing Akano that I never knew I cared so little about. Akano was also fascinated with ancient Egypt, which makes it even more curious why he would travel all the way to Australia. I mean, that's not even close to Egypt.
     
    As per his will, Akano shall have his lips sewn shut, his eyebrows plucked and the rest of him mummified. The mummy will be put on display as a warning to small children of what happens when you pick a fight with Australian fauna. May he rest in peace.
     
    Pay your respects, then get off my lawn,
    ~Tekulo <3
  17. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    I just got back home from the movies. I'm normally not a movie person, personally. Movies tend to be about heteronormative romances on the side of some other quirk designed to sell tickets for whatever special effects the industry wants to show off this time. Okay, maybe that's a tad unfair because I'm not a movie person, but that's how I generally view them. And it's not like I dislike every movie. But mostly I stick to Disney movies. That has changed lately as I am now a bus ride or a decent walk away from a movie theater these days. And hey, I actually have an income now, so I can actually justify going out to enjoy my life. I digress.
     
    When I first heard that this movie was about a gay romance with a PG-13 rating, I pretty much knew I was going to see it. LGBT movies tend to be too trashy or too heartbreaking or too esoteric for me to notice. Granted I haven't seen too many of them, but in general none of them really quite fit. It's kind of like "even when it's LGBT oriented it still doesn't really pertain to me." Maybe I've just seen the wrong movies.
     
    So my experience started when I first entered the theater. I was second in line at the ticket booth. I had gotten there about twenty minutes before the theater opened for the afternoon (they open 15 minutes before the first movie is scheduled to air). After I got a small soda and popcorn, I was the first person in the theater. Now, I live in a more conservative area so I honestly wasn't sure if anyone else was going to show (even though it was opening weekend for Love, Simon).
     
    The first group to walk in was this group of teenagers. Not wanting to be a total creep, I didn't make eye contact, something I rarely do with anyone I don't personally know, and I browsed my phone. I couldn't help overhearing them, however. They were talking about whether or not they had come out to their family. Most of them had, but one of them said they hadn't. "My mom thinks I'm confused." One of them said and in response their friend said "Hahaha, it's cute that [she] thinks that." They talked about their orientations "I'm pan." "I'm grey asexual" and so on. One of them made a point to say that none of their group was heterosexual.
     
    This struck a chord with me. I had known there were other kids who were out when I was going to school. I decided to remain closeted for a long period of my life. I went through most of my younger days dealing with everything on my own. It was difficult at the time. It made me really happy just to overhear these young adults. Throughout the entire movie they were reacting (just like I was) to the events onscreen.
     
    Most of the people who came in after that seemed to be young women. There was one elderly couple.
     
    One thing the theater seemed to lack were problematic men. That suited me just fine.
     
    After the previews aired, the countdown for the movie started. I honestly didn't realize how excited I was to see this movie until just before it started. I was really optimistic. For the first time ever, t h e... f i r s t... t i m e... e v e r, I felt like I was seeing a movie that was made for someone like me. Even if I wound up not liking the movie, which I knew was a very real possibility, I knew that this was something that I never had before. Going to the movie theater to see a movie about a gay teen as the average joe. I never thought I'd have that experience, so to actually have it... I don't even know what words to use to describe how that felt.
     
    As for the movie? Well, without spoiling anything, I have to say I really enjoyed it. I wish I had seen a movie like this one when I was still a questioning teenager. It touches base on a fair amount of issues that I personally related to, even if they weren't exactly the same situations. There was more than one scene where I felt like "Oh, Simon, I feel you, bro" and there was definitely more than one scene that got an emotional reaction out of me. In my opinion this movie doesn't waste a single minute of its screen time.
     
     
    After the movie my head was filled with so many thoughts. This was an incredible experience and all it took was one movie that did a good job representing someone like me.
     
    -Tekulo
  18. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    I just can't get my hopes up anymore.
     
    I really just want to be happy. But that doesn't just happen after years of depression and anxiety. I would love it, really love it, if I could just not be anxious or depressed anymore. But I could move a thousand times and life could go perfectly and I'd still be stressed out.
     
    It takes work and it takes time and there are going to be days where I'm just exhausted and miserable and don't want to deal with anything.
     
    I dunno. I feel I've had a lot of pressure growing up that if things weren't perfect then it was akin to the end of the world. I feel like I was raised with that mentality. But alas, my life has been far from ideal or perfect. I wasn't ready for mental illness or pressure from being LGBT+ in a family that is heteronormative or just how far behind I got in the business of living.
     
    So, I give up. I'll never have that perfect, ideal life I was trained to expect. And I'd love to say it's better that way, but it honestly is hard. And exhausting. And I don't always know if I'll make it.
     
    Isn't that just disheartening?
  19. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So this is just me trying to figure out where I stand on my gender identity. I know to some this could seem like "oh what a special snowflake -eyeroll-" but this blog isn't for those people.
     
    So... I identify as genderqueer. That could mean a lot of different things potentially. For me it's... weird.
     
    I kind of alqays identified with female leads in storytelling more so than male ones. I kind of realized lately that I think I hold myself to a feminine standard of beauty. Like for example body positivity is a relatively new thing for me. I feel like it's expected for men to want to be macho and muscular, have a six pack, be macho... I kind of find myself happier with the idea of more of a petit feminine figure. Of course with my big fluffy naturally masculine body that's just a fantasy really, haha. There has been some dysphoria, I think. I catch myself often thinking in a feminine voice. Sometimes how I wish I could look (sterotypically "pretty" for lack of a better way to put it) and how I actually am don't really match. Generally though I think part of this deals with the standards of beauty set by society and I don't think it's really healthy to try to judge myself on something so superficial.
     
    So, yeah, I have some tendencies that make me feel more feminine than masculine.
     
    I'm honestly not sure if I've ever really felt very boyish or masculine, really. I remember this one time I got a buzz cut as a kid and locked myself in the bathroom because I thought I looked ugly, hahaha. Though honestly while there is some dysphoria, I also kind of like that I was born male. It's more of a recent thing, I feel. I've been letting go of jealousy little by little (maybe from the fact that I don't look as "pretty" as I may have liked) and look in the mirror and... I used to hate how I looked, but within the past few years I kind of like that I look handsome. I have a cute jaw line, the shape of my nose, even my bulky figure and body hair. I even kind of wish I had a lot more chest hair than I already do hahaha.
     
    It's strange, really, how I look at myself.
     
    I'd sing in the shower and try to hit a high pitch to sound like the woman who sings the song, but I try too hard to compensate for my naturally deep voice. It's a different experience to realize that my voice is deep and I should try to sing like myself instead of an unrealistic image I have in my head. That slim figure I'm jealous of, that petit feminine idea that I have in my head... that's touched up Hollywood smoke and mirrors. Though it is also an influence on me.
     
    I've been working bit by bit to feel more naturally... well, more like myself.
     
    And I have a side of me that is a bit feminine. And there's a part of me that likes myself the way I am. I never really felt comfortable identifying as female, but if I said I was a cisgendered male, that also doesn't seem to fit.
     
    It's... well it's strange. I never grew up knowing people could be queer and that's totally okay. I never had any resources to really help me figure any of this out. I would love to do more research on gender identity to help me figure this out more.
     
    But I honestly don't really know where to look.
     
    At any rate, I'm always learning more about how I personally view my identity and slowly but surely I've been growing more comfortable being me. As of right now I thing calling myself genderqueer fits best in its own weird way.
  22. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    Seattle

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    So this past weekend I decided to spend a night in Seattle. I got some bonus cash over the holidays so I decided to give it a go. Now, this was my first trip that I've fully planned by myself. Booking the hotel, making travel arrangements, etc. It was a bit stressful as things didn't go totally as planned. XD Luckily for me, I have a friend who lives in the area who was able to show me around.
     
    And, well, I honestly loved it. I don't know why, but I've always sort of loved cities. The people, the culture, being able to actually walk places... it's great imo. I haven't been to a large downtown area since my trip to New York City a couple years ago. I ended up exploring a part of Seattle where there was an LGBT community. Rainbow flags were on display in a lot of the shops and there was advertising showing gay couples. I even decided to check out a thrift store because it had a sign that said it welcomed people regardless of race, sexual orientation, religion, etc. The sign said "You are SAFE here." This trip was the second time ever I felt at ease in public in a long time. The first time was this past summer at Seattle Pride in June.
     
    At one point I walked around the city looking for a park to kill some time, and I came across this cat themed book store. They had cats inside and they were very friendly. I was immediately drawn to the Queer Studies section. LGBT literature is something I have always been severely starved for. In my hometown in Ohio I looked for LGBT literature in my local library and only found one single book on the subject. So, for me, to have access to a collection of books about Queer Studies was kind of huge for me. Granted, I do have a kindle and if I knew what books to look for I could probably build up a stronger collection of LGBT literature, but as someone who grew up in a community where talking about homosexuality is somehow "bad" I honestly don't even know what to look for. This was honestly a first for me, to have that kind of resource where I could just browse LGBT books. And mind you, I have been to libraries and bookstores before, but I never found an entire section dedicated to Queer Studies. I walked out of there with five books which I am pretty stoked about.
    So that was my first day. I did a little shopping and just felt at ease in the city. For me that was an amazingly nice change of pace.
     
    My second day in Seattle I spent it with my friend. I met her when I worked at my previous summer job in Washington. She's one of the coolest people I've met. XD We went to an asian market in the International District. I picked up some baked goods (I love desserts and baked goods from other cultures because in America we kind of tend to have way too much sugar in our foods. I got a really nice green tea roll with red bean paste, an assortment of buns, and a cream horn. They were just factory made bakery items, but I was still happy with them. After that, we went to a ramen restaurant. We got vegetarian ramen and I ordered Octopus dumplings to share (as we are both pescaterian). It was a really good meal in my opinion. For the rest of my trip I had just packed my own homemade pizza and ate that the rest of the trip.
     
    We also went to some thrift stores. I managed to find three pairs of shoes (which is amazing because finding shoes in my size is rare for me), a very comfortable sweater and a suit jacket (I have a wedding to go to later this year hahaha). We were both in food comas from the sweets and ramen at the end of our adventures. XD So after that we just went back to my friend's place and relaxed watching dumb internet videos until I had to catch my ride back home.
     
    It was a nice full day.
     
    One of my favorite things, though, is after it got dark and I got to see the lights on the Seattle skyline. No matter where I am, I love seeing city lights. There's just something enchanting about it.
     
    But anyway, now I feel refreshed and ready to get back to work tomorrow. After a very stressful holiday season in foodservice at a new job, I really needed to take some time to relax.
     
    Edit: tl;dr - I spent time looking at gay books while I had a cat purring up a storm in my lap. Needless to say I had a successful vacation.
  23. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Whew, been a while.
     
    So to keep y'all updated, I did go through with the move to WA. I have a room for rent in a house and my landlord and housemate are very nice people.
     
    Being in OH with my family was a way stressful living situation so hopefully my time here will give me some space to breathe. Also, you know, it seems generally more LGBT friendly than where I was before. Like I'm still in a more conservative area, but nobody knows me here and omg that alone is so much less pressure.
     
    But anyway, I've been improving at my work and I've been getting the hang of things. The holiday season was very busy and stressful and it turns out other stuff caused more stress on top of that (online dating profiles are hahahahababababababababababa)
     
    I've decided to go full on pescaterian si that's exciting. I take a daily dose of omega 3's in the form of fish oil pills and just eat fish whenever I'm in the mood for it.
     
    I got lots of love from some friends back home that I usually see this time of year, and I'm honestly touched I have people in my life who bother to miss me (aside from just blood relatives, mind you lol).
     
    Adulting and budgeting and trying to save money is a new thing, but it looks like I'm managing it alright so far.
     
    Other than that, stress is still freaking exhausting, but I feel like I'm overall handling it okay. It's strange finding new ways to manage stress after years of handling it poorly.
     
    Also I live with dogs now and omg did I miss having dogs around.
     
    Well, that's more or less what's been up with me.
     
    How about y'all?
  24. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Turn and face the strAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
     
    I GOT A JOB IN WASHINGTON AS A PASTRY CHEF AND I ACCEPTED IT AND NOW I HAVE TO APARTMENT HUNT AND FIND A PLACE TO LIVE WITHIN A MONTH AND THIS IS REAL ACTUAL ADULT STUFF THAT MY EDUCATION AND LIFE EXPERIENCES DID NOT PREPARE ME FOR.
     
    WHAT IS? HOW DO?
     
    But, like, everyone at work keeps telling me finding a place is the easy part and that I'll be fine and that is reassuring.
     
    @w@
     
    This is gonna be fuuuuuuuuuuuuuun.
  25. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So... long story short SUMMER HAPPENED AND IT IS STILL HAPPENING OMG
     
    I think the last time I was on here was before the start of my summer job. Idk dudes and female dudes, I'm too lazy to check.
     
    BUT ANYWAY
     
    This summer has been... an adventure so far. Things I've done:
     
    I've cuddled with a couple of cute guys.
    I've had my first boyfriend (that only lasted about a month and a half, but while it was short lived it was really sweet)
    I made a friend irl who is a dude that falls under the LGBT spectrum. First time that's happened lol.
    I buzzed the side of my head and rocked a Skrillex-esque hairstyle.
    I gave myself a full undercut and cut my hair short and it looks super cute.
    I got my first ear piercing (only my right ear).
    Got a New! 3DS which happens to be the ugLIEST THING IN ALL OF EXISTENCE
    Made employee of the month for the first time in my career
    I came out of my shell this season and got closer with old friends from last year and made new ones.
    I've lost 30 lbs (tho I'm still fat lol)
    Also I came out of the closet this season and it has been a huuuuuuuuge weight off my shoulders.
    Many fun stories that I cannot divulge to y'all here on bzp.
     
    It's been a good summer. Life happened. Drama reared its ugly head. I got to have new experiences in a safe environment and express myself in ways I never have before. I'm going to miss it up here. I still have one month left, but the months have been going by rather quickly even when they seem to take a while to pass.
     
    I'm really glad I came back for a second season.
     
    That covers the long and short of stuff, more or less.
     
    How have y'all been?
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