Steal the Mask 2

[Some Random Phrase]

As you reflect upon these matters, you notice a meteorite in the sky. It streaks downward, hitting the ground with terrific force a full football field away from you. The small black sphere is but a homing device, as twoscore robotic troops teleport down from my moonship and aim blasters at everyone here. I, in a robotic suit of armor similar to an Exo-Toa, teleport down and take the mask. The troops beam up with me again, and the moonship warps away. There is only the black sphere remains, projecting a holographic message:

 

MY MASK

[Quisoves Potoo]

Well, why bother trying to find the real mask when you can blow everyone to bits. I take it you aren't Irish, Kopaka's Kool Kompanion. Mind you, I wouldn't have a drop if Irish blood if I hadn't fused myself to a leprechaun. Anyway, I use my powers of concentration to temporarily (ha-ha) to bend the fabric of time and space, and travel to the Museum of Kanohi on Terratalia in the year 5,000,000,000,002. There, I scan the records on the Ignika, up to immediately after the point at which I lost it. Using my newfound information, I travel back in time and space to confront McStudz on his holiday in San Diego, where I slip a sedative into his drink as he is dining on Italian food. After he is unconscious, I steal the Kanohi and then concentrate, sending McStudz through space and time, smack-dab into the middle of the court of Frederick the Great of Prussia. The Emperor is not amused by your abrupt interruption. But, that is your problem, I am over three centuries and over seven-thousand miles away. And the mask is mine!

EDIT: Oh my giddy aunt! Contradictory versions of events. Oh well, I'll just have to accept that it's wibbly-wobly-timey-wimey.

Edited April 17, 2014 by Quisoves Pugnat

[Stan McStudz]

Wibbly-Wobbly, Timey-Wimey...

 

Blimey, I sure am glad I'm still David Tenant!

 

1700s Prussia... Oh, this is one bit of Earth's history I never really thought about. Three (deleted!) episodes of Doctor Who later, I hop into my TARDIS (Which I got back in Part 2 of "The Pirates of Prussia") and figure out where exactly the Mask is. I find out that time has gone a bit askew, and there are now TWO masks for me to worry about. I head down to Modern-day Earth, grab myself a cute companion, and we spend a whole bloody season doing nothing, but somehow this all leads up to finding the first mask.

 

We end up in Fekoro's Moonship (TOTALLY NOT A DEATH STAR), with guns aimed at us. I say some rousing speech about unlimited power in the wrong hands, and the deaths of so many, and the fact that there are TWO masks now, creating a paradox.

 

At that time, Quisoves shows up. Me being Scottish and his being part Irish ends up with me grabbing Ignika Prime and pitting it against his Paradox Ignika. Planets are destroyed, universes freeze, creations burn, timelines written and rewritten again until my companion smacks Quisoves across the back of the head with a fish (FISH KILL!).

 

Due to poor writing with time travel, the Paradox Ignika fades away. All of time and space is restored. Quisoves, unable to concentrate after being hit with the Sacred Cod, is detained by Fekoro's bots.

 

Companion and I slip out, making our leave in the TARDIS...

 

WITH THE MASK.

 

 

 

 

TL;DR I undid the paradox Quisoves did on us and now have the mask. Good luck trying to find out where and when I am!!!

Edited April 17, 2014 by Stan McStudz

[Quisoves Potoo]

I awake, now unfused from the Leprechaun. Now thoroughly not Irish, I am once more attuned to the whereabouts of the blood of Scottishmen (twas' so unpleasant having the Scot in me suppressed by that fusion.) I convince the guard that my possession of the Ignika is a necessary for the defeat of the Dark Hunters and the Brotherhood of Makuta, so he loans me a vortex manipulator and fakes my death. Using my Scot-detecting abilities (which I concentrate by reciting Robert Burns' "To a Mouse") I arrive at your location on the Lost Moon of Poosh. Using my Venusian alkido, I overcome you like the tim'rous beastie you are. I then use my vortex manipulator to land myself at the Festival of Ghana in 1996. IT'S A TRAP! The Mask is mine!

Edited April 17, 2014 by Quisoves Pugnat

[Some Random Phrase]

I hit three more buttons on my control panel. As the graviton-burst hyper-space relativity jump drive enages, I hook it up to three stolen Vahi from alternate timelines, and timetravel back through the fourth axis. Scanners find the location of the mask by tracking its energy, and I warp above your area. I beam a force of FOhrok down, which take the mask and beam up again. I warp to the Andromeda Galaxy.

[Quisoves Potoo]

Ah, but the Mask you have is really a fake, home instead to a (mostly) powerless Djinii who loves the works of James Joyce. He proceeds to talk you blue-in-the-face. He then hypnotizes you and makes you order your Fohroks to imprison you in an antimatter universe (don't worry, you were converted to anti-matter beforehand.) You now must have your ear talked-off by a delusional Galifreyian engineer who made timetravel possible and who specializes in making deadly blobby dalek/gummy thingies and bipedal skeltoid chicken-like creatures. Best of luck!

And that, my good sir, is why must always end your posts here with something to the effect of "My mask!"

[Onaku]

Due to Quisoves not actually taking the mask, I simply pick it up and slip away on my small warpship, jumping at unimaginable speeds to a galaxy far far away. There, I land on a nice little tropical planet, and take a vacation, with the mask still in my ship, stored within a pocket dimension which cannot be accessed by anyone but me.

 

My mask... for now.

[Quisoves Potoo]

Due to Quisoves not actually taking the mask, I simply pick it up and slip away on my small warpship, jumping at unimaginable speeds to a galaxy far far away. There, I land on a nice little tropical planet, and take a vacation, with the mask still in my ship, stored within a pocket dimension which cannot be accessed by anyone but me.

 

My mask... for now.

You err. It was Fekoro who did not take the mask. Therefore, you simply have the fake with the (mostly) powerless djinii. I hope you enjoy the works of Joyce.

The mask, as it has been for several posts now, is mine.

[Pohatu: Uniter of Stone]

I pop out of a nearby rock and take the mask and pop back in.

My Mask!

Edited April 17, 2014 by RahkshiToa88

[Toa Smoke Monster]

I teleport behind you and knock you out. I then take the Mask and use a shrink ray to make it the size of an atom. I then put it in my pocket and head for the hills.

 

My very tiny Mask.

[Some Random Phrase]

In the antimatter realm, I build a dimension-hopper. Unfortunately, I am turned to gamma photons the instant I appear in the atmosphere. This does have some good things about it. For instance, I can find TSM, mess with the shrink ray to reverse it, grab the Mask, and run to my base, where I am converted to regular matter and warped to my moonship in the Andromeda Galaxy.

 

My mask

[Onaku]

Unfortunately for you, the moonship which once was yours has now been taken over by me. The guards aboard it confiscate the mask, then put you in the brig. I offer you to join me as my second in command, but until then...

 

My mask.

[Drakmanka]

I fly in on a nuclear-powered potato(because why not?) and blow up your would-be moonship using the power of infinitely-expanding bubblegum.

While you and your associates are busy trying to unstick yourself from the ever-growing wad of ABC gum, I snatch the mask away with a jelly-fish-powered tractor beam. I then jet away into the cosmos in my new potato-rocket.

 

My mask.

[Onaku]

I rigged the mask with explosives that go off if they leave my vicinity for too long. Kaboom you go, along with your precious potato rocket. Meanwhile, me and the crew of the moonship manage to suppress the ever-expanding bubblegum with a freeze gun and a LOT of wet cloths. I then activate the teleportation device I planted on the mask, which fortunately was protected from the explosion, and receive the mask into my hands once again.

 

My mask, and my proposal still stands, Fekoro...

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I laser beam you with my toes. Because fingertips and eyes are cliche.

 

My mask.

[Onaku]

You die from laser allergies before your lasers even reach a millimeter from your toes.

 

My mask.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I give you cancer.

 

Mu mask.

[JAG18]

I give you Bubonic Plague.

 

My mask.

[Toa Smoke Monster]

I give you death.

 

My Mask.

[JAG18]

I give you a fist full of Krana.

 

Only the fist hit you in the face.

 

My mask.

[Quisoves Potoo]

I give you a "Krataana," which gives you a vision about the all the actions that will take place in this mad Mask-stealing frenzy some fifty-posts hence. I take the mask while you are experiencing the vision and leave.

My Mask.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I give you a Metroid. Schlurp, schlurp, schlurp.

 

My mask.

[Stan McStudz]

I give you all a slap with my Holy Mackerel (FISH KILL!) and take the mask.

 

MY MASK.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I eat your mackerel. Then I stick camembert under your nose.

 

My mask.

[Mr. Lightning Bolt]

I discharge electricity as I go into Lorentz Force mode, causing your cloaking to short circuit. Seeing you, I use my Electromagnetic powers to thrust my fist towards you, sock you in the schnoz and use the other electromagnetically launched fist to steal the mask.
My mask!

[JAG18]

I use a Kanoka Disk of Shrinking to make you the perfect size for me to smush with my foot.

 

My mask.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I use a low power Kanoka of Relocation on the mask to bring it to me and a high power one on you. See ya on Venus!

 

My mask.

[Ehksidian]

I get an Olmak, and open a dimensional gate on the lower half of your body.

You get cut in half. Hah!

My mask.

[Toa Smoke Monster]

I use Visorak venom to mutate you into a Hordika. You then drop the Mask and go on a rampage.

 

My Mask.

[Ehksidian]

I kill you in my rampage, and re-obtain the mask and go back to normal.

 

My mask.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I burn you to a crisp. NOMNOMNOM

 

My mask.

[JAG18]

I hit you so hard, it makes your ancestors dizzy.

 

My mask.

[Mr. Lightning Bolt]

I recover, and use my magnetic power to raise a helicopter into the air. It starts to spin, and before long it's barreling towards you.

My mask.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I send Alpha Team after you.

 

My mask.

[Mr. Lightning Bolt]

I equip an explosive shield, and charge you with it.

My Mask.

[Kopakas Kool Kompanion]

I equip a defibrillator and charge you with it. 1 billion volts, coming right up!

 

My mask.

[Ehksidian]

I show you how pimpin' I am with the Merchant outfit.

You die of how pimpin' I am.

My mask.

[Toa Smoke Monster]

I give my great one-eyed stare, and you die because of it.

 

My Mask.

[Onaku]

I make a bombastic return, killing everyone in a thousand mile radius. I take the mask and jump into space faster than the speed of light.

 

My mask.

[Rahkshi Guurahk]

I teleport you guys to the 1500s and lock all of you in a room with an organ playing a C and an F# and you are arrested because that was an illegal chord then. (Seriously, llook up a Trichord)

My mask because I have a Tardis to escape in.