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The Kanohi Force


Dallior

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Now let's combine it all together!

 

Bears.

 

Sabretooth,

 

The Rocky Road to Dublin BearTown. 

 

Initiate the off topic-ness simulator,

 

Robotz.

 

Boredom,

Let's sell it as a children's poem. 

Incorrect. Let's not combine it all and please refrain from using this topic for discussing anything other than the official chapters posted by myself, Ghidora, or Dallior. There hasn't been a chapter posted since page 2, and we're currently on page 5. That's three pages of what has basically been spam.

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~Your friendly, neighborhood Shadow

 

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Incorrect. Let's not combine it all and please refrain from using this topic for discussing anything other than the official chapters posted by myself, Ghidora, or Dallior. There hasn't been a chapter posted since page 2, and we're currently on page 5. That's three pages of what has basically been spam.

 

Well, like I suggested before I was so rudely interrupted by a children's poem in the making (that is a very lucrative business by the way), a duck swarm that flies in and wrecks the place.  

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bZpOwEr

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Incorrect. Let's not combine it all and please refrain from using this topic for discussing anything other than the official chapters posted by myself, Ghidora, or Dallior. There hasn't been a chapter posted since page 2, and we're currently on page 5. That's three pages of what has basically been spam.

 

Well, like I suggested before I was so rudely interrupted by a children's poem in the making (that is a very lucrative business by the way), a duck swarm that flies in and wrecks the place.  

 

Very well. Your wording did not indicate this, and so just looked like more of the same.

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~Your friendly, neighborhood Shadow

 

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Incorrect. Let's not combine it all and please refrain from using this topic for discussing anything other than the official chapters posted by myself, Ghidora, or Dallior. There hasn't been a chapter posted since page 2, and we're currently on page 5. That's three pages of what has basically been spam.

 

But spam is funn...

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The~1st~Shadow contacted about what best to do, since this topic has been pretty much spam for the last three pages - spam that has a home neither here nor in COT. I recommend starting a multi-person PM - a Premier Member can do this. It will allow you to all chat at once without worrying about breaking rules on spam.

 

If none of you is able to start one, I can - and I wouldn't interfere. (I'd turn my notifications off.)

 

Edit: It seems one exists already, so I'd say go for it there.

Edited by -Windrider-
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The~1st~Shadow contacted about what best to do, since this topic has been pretty much spam for the last three pages - spam that has a home neither here nor in COT. I recommend starting a multi-person PM - a Premier Member can do this. It will allow you to all chat at once without worrying about breaking rules on spam.

 

If none of you is able to start one, I can - and I wouldn't interfere. (I'd turn my notifications off.)

 

Edit: It seems one exists already, so I'd say go for it there.

One does?

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The~1st~Shadow contacted about what best to do, since this topic has been pretty much spam for the last three pages - spam that has a home neither here nor in COT. I recommend starting a multi-person PM - a Premier Member can do this. It will allow you to all chat at once without worrying about breaking rules on spam.

 

If none of you is able to start one, I can - and I wouldn't interfere. (I'd turn my notifications off.)

 

Edit: It seems one exists already, so I'd say go for it there.

One does?

 

The Leedurship Board does. It's just for the leedurs of the Force, though.

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:a: :r: :z: :a: :k: :i:

I got Monster Hunter World on PS4, add me at bmrjw2 if you want

Also I play FFXIV, my main is Anastasia Willow on Exodus but I've got characters on every NA datacenter.

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The~1st~Shadow contacted about what best to do, since this topic has been pretty much spam for the last three pages - spam that has a home neither here nor in COT. I recommend starting a multi-person PM - a Premier Member can do this. It will allow you to all chat at once without worrying about breaking rules on spam.

 

If none of you is able to start one, I can - and I wouldn't interfere. (I'd turn my notifications off.)

 

Edit: It seems one exists already, so I'd say go for it there.

One does?

 

The Leedurship Board does. It's just for the leedurs of the Force, though.

 

Yes...because me...a dedicated fan...never gets included in PMs...or group paintings...because I'm not on the leedurship board...

*runs off to a corner and cries*

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bZpOwEr

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Oooh! OOOOOOOHHHHH! The Irrational Rock has an idea! A GOOD IDEA!

 

How about, instead of having a random, inexplicable swarm of ducks, you have a bunch of ducks that transform into people that try to perform a military coup and take over the Kanohi Force from the oppressive dictators? Eh? 

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bZpOwEr

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Oooh! OOOOOOOHHHHH! The Irrational Rock has an idea! A GOOD IDEA!

 

How about, instead of having a random, inexplicable swarm of ducks, you have a bunch of ducks that transform into people that try to perform a military coup and take over the Kanohi Force from the oppressive dictators? Eh? 

First of all, that is offencive, I am a duck, second of all, we would never plan something like that,

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                                                                                                                                                                   Kanohi Force Chapter 5:

                                                                                                                                                                          Stuff Happens



A few days after the last adventure, the Kanohi Force leaders were sitting around the table with nothing to do. That’s right, sitting. Normally they’d be talking about cupcakes or engaging in gladiatorial pillow fights or setting things on fire or all of the above. But now they had absolutely nothing to do.

“Wot say we rek those Matoran outside, m8?” Dallior piped up with a fake British accent, holding up a monocle to his eye.

“Booooring, who wants pizza?” Ghidora131 said halfheartedly, then went back to sleeping on the couch.

 

Aerixx stood up. “We have to do something before we-”

“Who’s Aerixx?” Jakura Nuva asked from under the table.

“I’m Aerixx: Gukko Lord!” shouted Aerixx: Gukko Lord. “Can’t you see my display name everytime I post?” he motioned to the three words floating above his head.


Everyone groaned.


Aerixx sighed. “I’m gonna go rek some Matoran outside, m8s.” he turned into a Gukko and flew out a window, oblivious to Dallior screeching, “I just said that! I JUST SAID THAT!”

The~1st~Shadow was just coming back from grocery shopping with a bag full of orange concrete for whatever reason. Aerixx returned to normal, ripped the bag out of ~T1S~’s hands, and chucked it at Jaller. It hit the Ta-Matoran square in the face, giving him a blackout and a mild concussion.

“Whyyyyyy?!” ~T1S~ wailed. “He was supposed to be important to the plot!”

Aerixx shrugged and flew back in, subconsciously taking ~T1S~’s keys and leaving him stranded. When he returned to the meeting room, nothing had changed.

“I just rekt some Matoran, m8s.” Aerixx huffed. When this didn’t draw a reaction, he said “Tahu3.0 just became a staff member.”

Every single person and non-person in the Kanohi Force got on their feet, throwing pizza, blankets, and iPhone 7s all over the place. When they’d settled down, The~1st~Shadow broke into the building in a Hazmat mech.

“To the spying machines!” he shouted, spraying more angry Matoran with radioactive waste.

All of the Leedurz settled into their respective chairs and turned on their spying machines, which were really just 1977 Apple PCs (or, in Aerixx’s case, a 1977 PineApple) that somehow defied universal laws by being able to access BZPower.

“Arzaki! How’s the Creations forum going?”

“Overflowing with an army of baby villager MOCs.”

“Jakura! How’s the General Art forum going?”

“It’s so beautiful there are no words for it...”

“Pohatu! How’s the Games and Trivia section going?”

“Neo ShadowVezon is pwning n00bz w/ style in Steal The Mask 3.”

“Okay, keep him occupied. Dallior, how’re the incoming New Members?”

“Mrrph frmh phrmhh!” Dallior contentedly munched on his Apple.

“He means that there’s been one new member, registered yesterday, who’s already reached the Member Title of ‘BZPower Hacked’, and is in the group of ‘Hacked Members’.” Aerixx, who was somehow able to translate mrrph speak, said.

“Hm... what’s his name?”

“His name... is Plaque Sticks.”

“Balderdash! We must alert Black Six!” ~T1S~ roared, scaring off yet another wave of angry Matoran.

Aerixx grinned. “We’ll handle this... using politix.”

Everyone, except Arzaki, gasped.

“What’s politix?” Arzaki stammered, his hands starting to sizzle. The other members reached for their portable fire extinguishers.

“Hitting people upside the heads with rubber mallets.” Aerixx hit Arzaki upside the head with a rubber mallet.

Suddenly, the third wall (thankfully it wasn’t the fourth) exploded with a mighty BOOM. Black Six burst in, his legendary banhammer streaked with rubble.

“There is to be no political discussion on BZPower!” He huffed, making the Leedurz hide in shame. But not Aerixx.

“Okay, acknowledged. Guess what, there’s a parody of you rising through the ranks of BZPower.” He showed the screen of his 1977 PineApple to Black Six, who nodded.

“I’ll take care of him. Heh, usually when someone parodies me, they do something stupid like ‘White Five’ or ‘Gray Seven’. Gotta give him points for originality. Whelp, I’ll be on my way.” Black Six hefted his banhammer and marched out of the half-destroyed building.

He was instantly covered by a mass of angry Matoran wielding makeshift weapons. Even Black Six’s banhammer couldn’t free him of the plastic .

“OH NOEZ!” wailed Ghidora dramatically. “Whatever will we do?!”

“There’s only one army powerful enough to bring these guys down,” Aerixx whispered. “The Kopaka fanboys.”

Suddenly, every Kopaka fanboy on BZPower received a PM. It said:

BEAT UP A BUNCH OF ANGRY MATORAN TO RESEEV A 2001 Kopaka Mata set!!!!

 

Instantly the courtyard filled with masses of BZPower members wearing shirts displaying ‘I <3 Kopaka’ and holding cardboard cutouts of Kopaka’s weapons.

The Matoran didn’t stand a chance. The only ones left standing were those wearing Akaku masks (because the Kopaka fans wouldn’t hurt the ‘baby Kopakas’). These lucky ones promptly grabbed their unconscious friends and started to drag them back to their respective parts of BZ-Nui.

Black Six gave a quick salute and used his magical banhammer to teleport him to the Staff center, were he promptly hammered Plaque Sticks in the gut, instantly banning him.

“Wow, good job, Aerixx,” Arzaki whistled, then realized Aerixx wasn’t there. “Uh, Aerixx?”

Outside, the disgruntled Kopaka fans were looking around, not knowing what to do next. And at their helm was... Aerixx.


“Where’s the Kopaka set?!” he screamed. “I need my Kopaka set!”

To be continued...

Edited by Ghidora131
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LOL This was definitely a funny one! :D I have just one concern...

 

When they’d settled down, The~1st~Shadow broke into the building in a Hazmat mech.

 

 

How... How could you know about the mech? I've been working on those for months in the Secret Lab! No one's supposed to know---

 

Uhm, ooh, eh.... I mean, "We get mechs now? That's cool, bruh." :lookaround:

Edited by The~1st~Shadow
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~Your friendly, neighborhood Shadow

 

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"Baby Kopakas" hehe,

Petewa, my boy, I think that you're old enough to learn where Kopakas come from. 

You see, it all began with the forging of the great Kopakas. These Kopakas wanted more of their kind. So, they went home and built more. Then they took them to a place called the BZSA (BZPower Security Agency) Headquarters, where the sets were transformed into computers. The computer are being used by the BZSA agents to monitor the population. However what the BZSA doesn't know is that the masses are being awakened. The hour of reckoning is coming. The third eye is opening. The resistance is coming. Their leader is planning. The plans for the coup d'etat have been set. Things are in motion. No longer will we suffer at the hands of these tyrannical overlords. It is time for a new era. VIVA LA RESISTANCE! LONG LIVE...um...uh...

 

I mean...great story, Ghidora...I love Kopaka...eh...

Edited by The Irrational Rock
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bZpOwEr

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I mean...great story, Ghidora...I love Kopaka...eh...

Actually, this one was Aerixx. Ghiddy forgot to include "Written by Aerixx: Gukko Lord" at the beginning.  <_<

I have plans for Ghiddy... yessssssssssss...

 

Make sure that it includes an uprising or otherwise blatant example of civil disobedience. Those are the best ones. Especially when you have the leader publicly disposed of by an angry mob clad in leather garments and carrying torches. 

 

Hail to the New Creparian Empress,

You're getting off-topic! No! Stop! Bad! T1S will call Windrider on you again! 

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bZpOwEr

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Hail to the New Creparian Empress,

You're getting off-topic! No! Stop! Bad! T1S will call Windrider on you again! 

 

*T1S uses the power of the Kanohi Flashbaki to summon hurricane-force winds, led by the one and only Windy*

 

 

(I might actually do something like this for the next chapter. Thanks for the idea, Rocky. :) )

Edited by The~1st~Shadow
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~Your friendly, neighborhood Shadow

 

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