SPIRIT

People who constantly beg their viewers to "rate, comment, subscribe, and smash that alert bell" are shallow and pathetic? Well I'll be a monkey's uncle.

Nathan Furst is a good egg.

You're thinking too small picture. Marka is obviously dark horse top tier in the Bionicle Waifu meta game. Let me list out my argument. 1) Doesn't change. You see her on Toa Nokama's CD, MNOG1, and MNOG2. She keeps the same mask. You want someone who's reliable and secure with their own self-image. None of this mask switching you see a bunch of the Matoran do between iterations. She's constant and reliable, and that's what a solid marriage is built on. 2) Owns a boat. I wouldn't say I'm an overly materialistic man, but I do appreciate a woman with affluence. You know how many people I know with a boat these days? Zero. I don't even think I know someone with a canoe. Major brownie points for owning a boat. 3) Is generous. You can go back and forth between Ga-Wahi, Po-Wahi, and Ta-Wahi a million times and she doesn't even charge you a single widget. Which brings me to my next point. 4) Is a savvy business women. In this day and age, how is someone with a boat supposed to compete with Big Kewa? They basically have a monopoly on transport on Mata Nui, but Marka finds a way to undercut them with an easy to use transportation service that doesn't make you solve a memory puzzle every time you want to use it. Not only that, but she also supports local industry and helps the unemployed, like Hahli. 5) Believes in purity. This is the Matoran who gives Hahli the Charm of Purity, showing that she is a true disciple of the Principle. She is truly pure of heart. Sure, your other waifus might shoot water, control Bohrok, or have Rahkshi head breastplates, but Marka isn't waifu material. She's wife material. I rest my case.

Have you tried getting Makuta to put you to sleep? Once he works his magic, you'll sleep like a log! Results may vary. Side effects may include drowsiness, earthquakes, evil schemes, complex storylines, and really cool Lego sets. Ask your doctor if Makuta is right for you.

2028 also marks the year that the African Union intends to launch its own currency. That's right, folks. Get rid of your Mauritian Rupees, your Congolese Francs, and your Zambian Kwachas, because they'll all be yesterday's news.

Onua was also featured in his own trailer for the never-released Bionicle video game. 2001 was the year of Onua! Oh how the turntables...

1) Briefly describe your past work experience. 2) What is your greatest strength? 3) What is one of your weaknesses? 4) Where do you see yourself in five years? 5) Describe a situation where you overcame adversity. 6) Describe a time when you achieved a long-term goal.

Maybe only certain mask types can accommodate a scope? Which is why they're only seen on Great Akaku and Matatu.

Obviously a species that derives its power from anger is not to be trusted. Anger is a chaotic and dangerous emotion, and it often results in innocents being injured. Also, given the island's close proximity to Nynrah, it would be only a matter of time before this anger-driven species acquired the Matoran Universe's best weaponry. Mata Nui, in his absentee management of the Matoran Universe failed to correct such an obvious oversight Under Teridax's leadership, a dangerous species was eradicated, and Nynrah was given much-needed protection from outside forces. #TheBrotherhoodDidNothingWrong

You want to watch The Room? Multiple times? Look, friend, it's all well and good to watch things ironically, but this is just too much. There is more to this life. There are people who value your well-being. Don't throw it all away like this. You are a human being with value. It's okay to ask for help.

So for fun, I thought I'd go through the different forums to find out which is the highest voted topic by Reputation Points. And then hand out pretend Internet Medals to the ones with the best score. Obviously Reputation Points are totally unbiased and a completely accurate metric for the quality of a post. ... Actually, I don't think anyone really looks at them. BUT I DID. FOR SCIENCE. The following is a list of the top 10 Comedies on BZPower based on the Reputation Points held by its first post... at the date and time that this blog entry was posted. Obviously there's nothing to stop people from going around and adding more points to their favourite Comedies, but I'll know that you did it. And I'll do the "shame on you hand gesture". Uh... so yeah, the list: 10. ~♥~ Kokoro no Ice ~♥~ by GSR with 13 Points 9. Staring Contest Continues by Onuki with 16 Points 8. WHAT IS THE POTOO?! 2 by Voltex with 17 Points 7. The Adventures of Sumiki's Dad - by Sumiki's Dad's Son with 20 Points 6. Wedding Announced by Onuki with 23 Points 4. (Tie) WHAT IS THE POTOO?! by Voltex with 26 Points 4. (Tie) Hakuna Vakama by Onuki with 26 Points 3. Poor Kongu... by SPIRIT with 28 Points 2. Game, Set, Match by Eyru with 30 Points 1. The Kaita and the Storyteller by GSR with 35 points Congratulations to GSR for getting the gold, Eyru for getting silver, and me for getting bronze. Special mention to Voltex and Onuki, the only people not in the top 3, but still in the top 10 multiple times. Ordinarily, I'd make the winners wonderful medals in Microsoft Paint, but as we all know, Microsoft Paint is being discontinued, and that's totally the reason not because I'm lazy. So what forum should I do next?

Lego Insectoids... Now there's a set line I've not heard in a long time.

Chapter 8- Episode 2: Trials of the Toa (Part 3) (Umarak stands outside the labyrinth and is greeted by the spirit of Makuta.) Umarak: Shall I follow? Makuta: You must. .... You know, honestly I don't even know why you bothered asking. What was I going to say? No? Umarak: Hey, I don't know, maybe you had some master plan where-- Makuta: THE ONLY THING IN THE WORLD I WANT IS LITERALLY JUST INSIDE THAT BUILDING WITH THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO CAN GET IT FOR ME. EXPLAIN TO ME HOW NOT FOLLOWING THEM WOULD BE THE BEST COURSE OF ACTION?! Umarak: Please don't yell, it hurts my feelings. Makuta: ... Have you chosen your prey? Umarak: I have. Makuta: Go, I will guide you. Umarak: Couldn't I just go in over the top? Makuta: And cheat?! Doesn't seem very sporting. No, it's better if you just go in the stupid way. Umarak: Sigh... (Inside the labyrinth, the Toa and the Creatures run through various corridors as Umarak watches. The giant moving cubes of stone constantly assault them, but they manage to dodge them all and plunge deeper into the labyrinth.) Kopaka: Wow, this is all so cool. I can't wait for the video game tie-in to all this. Think of all the story, lore, action, and adventure we'll get! Bionicle video games are always fun! President Lego: Exactly, that's why this year's video game is a boring iOS beat 'em up! Kopaka: Who hurt you? (Tahu and Ikir manage to jump to the others on their stone platform.) Lewa: Well done! Tahu: So is this floor really going to stay where it is? Lewa: I... you... THE FLOOR IS LITERALLY MOVING AS YOU ARE TALKING! Tahu: Sorry, I think I read my line a little early. Director: Look, I had to cut out the next five seconds where Tahu actually says that line for pacing. Tahu: See? I'm still cool. Director: Plus I needed to squeeze in some extra Tahu lines because he doesn't actually get his own episode. Tahu: Wait, what? (The group runs through a hallway and comes to a staircase.) Kopaka: We won't be here long! There's a room up here. Tahu: See? My line would've made total sense five seconds later! Now what was that about me not getting an episode? Director: Oh hey, let's do a fade transition! Tahu: But why? That usually indicates a longer passage of time than just climbing a staircase! Director: Pacing! Tahu: (The Toa enter a room with a hexagonal pattern on the floor.) Gali: Whoa, I don't like that at all. Kopaka: Forget it. Keep moving. Animators: Hey, we worked really hard on that. Gali: It's that same writing! Pohatu: What, you mean THE REGULAR WRITING THAT EVERYONE ELSE USES ON THE ISLAND?! WOW, WHAT A COMPLETE AND TOTAL MYSTERY HOW WE CAN READ THIS! Tahu: What's it say? (Gali dusts off some sand from the stone glyphs.) Pohatu: It should say, "nothing is trying to crush us, finally." Gali: I think these are our names. Pohatu: HOW DO YOU NOT EVEN KNOW HOW TO READ YOUR OWN NAME?! Lewa: Dibs on being Crush! Pohatu: I... what? Lewa: Well you said that the text says "nothing is trying to crush us, finally". And Gali said those are our names, so I'm calling dibs on being called "Crush". Pohatu: .... I have nothing to say to you. Gali: We should beware. Kopaka: Beware of what? Lewa: That! (Stone cubes fall from the ceiling and the group narrowly dodges them in time.) Pohatu: Does it say what to do? Gali: I don't know! I need more time. Pohatu: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! WHY CAN'T YOU READ? IS THIS A CALLBACK TO THE ILLITERATE NOKAMA JOKES FROM the great and wonderful comedy The First LoMN Spoof © SPIRIT 2004 OR SOMETHING?! I FEEL LIKE I'M THE ONLY SANE PERSON HERE! Tahu: More time? You don't have it! Ahhh! (Tahu is nearly crushed by another cube.) Gali: Wait. Almost. (Kopaka runs to Gali and pushes her out of the way just in time before a cube lands where she was standing.) Pohatu: Enough! These are stones, we can stop them. I'm ready. Come on! (Ketar and Pohatu unite. They blast away all the cubes.) Pohatu: Now get off me. Ketar: You know, you should've really thought of that sooner. LIKE THE INSTANT STONES STARTED TRYING TO KILL US! Pohatu: I, uh... So guys, how about that cool mysterious writing that's really hard to decipher? Ketar: You are total trash. (The other Toa stare at Pohatu.) Pohatu: What? Kopaka: Thanks. (Gali resumes her reading.) Gali: We have to stand like a compass. Tahu: But a compass has four directions. Gali: Aha, but those are just the cardinal directions. You forgot about the ordinal directions. Tahu: That makes 8. Gali: And if you erase part of 8, what do you get? 6. I rest my case. Tahu: ... Kopaka: And which one of us is north? Lewa: But Okoto has six regions. Like the colours on the floor. Huh, weird. The subtitles actually spelled "colours" with a U. Is that just on Canadian Netflix? Truly a mystery for the ages. (Lewa points to each symbol.) Lewa: Ice and Water and Jungle and Fire and Earth and Stone. Onua: You do know what a comma is, right? Lewa: Duh! Generation 1 was all about Mata Nui being in a comma for a thousand years. Onua: ... (The Toa and their Creatures stand by their respective symbols.) Gali: United but not one. Lewa: Sure, six doors to a single room. (The Toa unite with their Creatures. The symbols below them glow, revealing staircases to a chamber down below.) Tahu: So wait, the puzzle was just to stand on our own symbols? It took us like 2 minutes to figure that out and we almost died in the process. Wow, we are stupid. (Pohatu and Ketar are the only ones remaining.) Ketar: So are we uniting or what? Pohatu: We really don't have to. Let's just take someone else's staircase. Seems kind of silly to give us each our own one. Not exactly what I'd call high security. (Suddenly, Umarak emerges from the shadows and blasts Pohatu across the room. Umarak uses his shadow powers to grab Ketar, drawing the scorpion towards him. The two unite.) Pohatu: No! Umarak: I've been trying to steal a Creature for the last two episodes. What do you expect? Pohatu: No, I mean, it's really lazy to use your powers to pick him up when he's just in front of you. Obesity is a growing epidemic, you know. Umarak: Look, I did it for dramatic effect, okay? Pohatu: No! (Pohatu charges at Umarak, only to have Umarak summon a giant stone cube to crush him.) Umarak: Feel that? It is the power that you squandered. Now, it is mine! (Pohatu lies on the ground in defeat. Umarak turns to GregF.) Umarak: See that? Me actually using elemental Stone for something useful? It is the power that you squandered. Now, it is cool! GregF: Hey, I once let Onewa make giant stone fists in one of the books. Umarak: I rest my case. GregF: Hey, I was all for evil Toa Ahkmou, but the set designers wouldn't do it. Umarak: See that? Stone actually has a prominent role for a change! It is the colour scheme that you squandered! Now, it is profitable! Set Designers: Yeah, the Stone sets always sold the worst. Also we're literally replacing you in the same year so there's not much incentive for anyone to buy your first set. Umarak: ... I'll just go down my staircase now. Pohatu: OR USE ANY OF THE OTHERS! THEY'RE STILL OPEN! THIS WHOLE SCENE WAS POINTLESS! (In the chamber below, the other five Toa approach the Mask of Control encased in green crystal.) Onua: How do we free the mask? Lewa: How about we spam Twitter with #FreeTheMask? That has literally worked every single time people have tried it for other things. Gali: Six creatures, six keys. Tahu: Six garbanzo beans! Don't just list things off like it's a riddle. It's not even locked up, it's just covered in crystal. Break the crystal and get the mask. Why is this so difficult to understand? Gali: We need Ketar. Tahu: Ah yes, of course. We'll use his elemental control over stone to break the crystal and-- Gali: Then we'll use the power of our combined friendship to free the mask! Tahu: If we do that rainbow thing from the other movies, I'm leaving. Lewa: There he is! (The Stone door opens, only to reveal a red wave of energy which blasts the Toa away. Umarak stands in the doorway.) Lewa: The Hunter! Umarak: Wait, did I not introduce myself? I'm Umarak, the Hunter. Gali: Doesn't "Umarak" mean "shadow hunter" in the Okotan language? Your name is Shadow Hunter the Hunter? Umarak: Like that's any better than "Kanohi" being the Matoran word for "mask". (Umarak fires Shadow Traps at the Toa, which they quickly shake off. Umarak smashes the crystal encasing the Mask of Control.) Tahu: I told you guys that's how we should do it. But nooooo, we just had to do the maze properly and unite our powers to free the mask. I bet Umarak even cheated and went in through the top. Umarak: (Umarak's power surges through the room, causing it to crumble and collapse.) Gali: We need to get out of here! (Umarak breaks open the ceiling and flies out of the labyrinth past Pohatu.) Pohatu: No! Umarak: You sure say "no" a lot in this chapter. Did they just pay you to say the line once and reuse it to save money? Pohatu: Yes. (Pohatu chooses to ignore physics and uses the giant cubes falling from the ceiling to propel himself up after Umarak. Umarak has similar disregard for physics and jumps to a cliff overlooking the labyrinth. Pohatu joins him, dealing Umarak a devastating kick.) Umarak: Fool! I control your Creature! I control your power. (Umarak lifts a stone out of the ground and hurls it at Pohatu, who shatters it with a single punch.) Pohatu: You do not control Ketar! Also, I obviously still have my own power. Not sure what you expect to accomplish here... Umarak: I'm giving the fans their one and only Stone vs. Stone fight. Let them have this. Pohatu: Fair point... I can feel him fighting you! Umarak: I have the mask. And you are alone. Pohatu: No, I'm not! (Ketar chitters and Umarak glows red and starts screaming. Pohatu tackles him and Ketar is freed. Pohatu runs to the Mask of Control, but Umarak grabs Ketar and dangles him over the cliff.) Umarak: Toa! Go, claim the mask, but say goodbye to your Creature. (Umarak drops Ketar and Pohatu dives after him.) Ketar: What are you doing? I'm a scorpion! I have an exoskeleton that will protect me from falls from great heights. Also I'm not even unconscious or anything. I could just use my powers to make a stone ledge to rescue myself. Also you're diving off a cliff into nothingness. How do you expect to rescue me? Pohatu: Look, I think the important thing is that I learned a lesson about friendship. Ketar: Oh cool, I'm so glad I'll be alive to see Makuta brutally murder us all when Umarak resurrects him because you're an idiot. Pohatu: But... friendship. (Umarak gazes down at Pohatu and Ketar as they climb back up the cliff.) Umarak: You care. That makes you weak. Nidhiki: No, the line is "Compassion was always your weakness, brother!" Umarak: I am just a bad ripoff of you, aren't I? Nidhiki: Yeppers. (Umarak holds the Mask of Control above Pohatu.) Umarak: You have no chance against Makuta. Pohatu: We'll see about that. (The other Toa arrive, but Umarak vanishes into the shadows.) Pohatu: I'm sorry. I understand now. I feel it. Ketar: That had better be in reference to my previous tirade about you being an idiot. (Pohatu climbs up the cliff with Ketar.) Pohatu: I'm sorry. I lost the mask. Onua: But you saved Ketar. And you were relevant to the plot for the first time in your character's existence. Tahu: You did the right thing. Now we can squeeze two more episodes out of this. Pohatu: The Hunter said caring made us weak. Lewa: He was wrong. Gali: Caring doesn't make us weak. Lewa: That's why we're gonna beat Makuta. Because we care, for each other, and Okoto. Pohatu: This island we've been on for like a week? Yeah, I super care about what happens to it. Kopaka: We'll get that mask back. Onua: And we'll do it together. (The Toa gaze dramatically at Okoto.) Director: And that's the homage scene to The Legend Reborn taken care of. Next scene! (Meanwhile, in a far off temple, Umarak consults the spirit of Makuta.) Makuta: You have done well. You actually made the most boring Toa relevant to the plot. Umarak: They are weak, and I am the Hunter. Makuta: You're Shadow Hunter the Hunter?? Umarak: Makuta: You were the Hunter. Now you are my servant. Umarak: I serve no one! Makuta: WELL THEN PREPARE TO GET SERVED! (For no adequately explained reason, Umarak takes off his own mask and puts on the Mask of Control.) Makuta: As strong as you think you are, I am stronger. (Umarak collapses and starts to transform.) Makuta: There are events that must transpire so that I may be freed. You are Hunter no more. You are my minion. You are Destroyer! Umarak: I'm a Minion? NOOOOOOOOOOO! Everyone's Aunt: Oh hey, let me just share you on Facebook in stupid pictures. Umarak:

Tahu's Adventures 2: This Time it's Not Tahu's Adventures 1

Let us take a trip down memory lane... I remember first coming to BZPower while doing a Google search for info on the Bohrok-Kal and being amazed at this goldmine of Bionicle info and fandom I had stumbled upon. Leaked set images, secret storyline info, people who liked this Bioncle thing even more than I did. It wasn't long until BZP replaced the Neopets hotkey on my keyboard.I remember bingeing through Onuanut's Comedy Matoran @ Home and finally deciding to write my own after a while. It was exciting because it was really the first thing I'd written on the internet. And weirder still, people actually told me they liked it! A much-needed boost to the self-esteem of 14 year old me. I eventually went on to write other things and I still enjoy writing to this day.I remember when Lewa11 came onto the scene and announced his plan to make an animated movie: Quest of the Toa. I was so excited about potentially being cast as the voice of a Bionicle character in what was sure to be the biggest Bionicle fan-made thing ever. Sadly, the project never came to fruition, but that indirectly introduced me to the AIM and MSN Messenger side of the fandom, allowing me to make a lot of close friendships with other BZPers. I remember working with Electric Turahk to keep an AIM group chat called Ceechat online for several months in a row.I remember starting a Bionicle podcast and all the challenges involved in making it while in high school and on a $0 budget. I don't think I could ever go back to listen to those episodes, but I definitely learned a whole lot about sound editing and how to Skype long before Skype became the household name it is today.I remember when the Software Forum was mostly fan-made games. Such a fascinating cross-section of fandom I've never seen anywhere else. I remember playing the Paracosmos Game, this other game that was all about Toa Nidhiki, Populous's game that had these amazing animations and smooth parkour gameplay with Toa Lhikan, and I especially remember the BZP Smash Brothers game. It was so cool seeing avatars and OCs I recognized going head to head like that. I was almost in the sequel to that game, but that didn't work out either. It got me into using Game Maker myself and it was actually a whole lot of fun. I played around with top down 2D games and platformers for a bit, trying to figure out the physics of the engine. Eventually I started two projects; one was this Bionicle reference guide and the other was a video game adaptation of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. It's a shame that I spent so much work on both and their files are long gone. I had no idea the enormity of those projects when I set out, but I feel like my unfinished products for both were very impressive.I remember getting to beta test the fan-made Metru Nui Online Game and the viral disk collecting campaign that accompanied it. It was so fun to see Metru Nui interpreted in the Templar Studios styleI remember being bored one afternoon when I was like 16 and writing, recording, and animating (that took a few more afternoons) my first Flash video. Once again, I was very surprised by the overwhelming positive response it and its sequels received, and ultimately it gave me the opportunity to be the voice actor I never got to be after Quest for the Toa folded. It's funny how the site evolved after that. Around that time, hardly anything made on BZP used voice talent, but as time went on other BZPers began making more projects that called for voices and it was fun getting to work with them on those.I remembering becoming staff. That was pretty fun, getting to see the goings on behind the scenes, walking among these larger than life personas that I'd seen posting for all those years. I remember the staff RPG we did, and then all the work I poured into the Bionicle Reference Centre, especially for that timeline and the Kraata Maker. To this day that Kraata Maker Flash file might be the most complicated thing I have ever made. Eventually I had to take a break from BZP (and being staff, obviously) for personal reasons, but man, what a ride.I remember posting and discussing countless theories in the Storyline and Theories forum. I think my first topic to make it to the front page was about how Hewkii indirectly defeated Makuta by inventing Kolhii. But yeah, basically my Most Active In forum on my profile always has been S&T, and it was easily my favourite part of the BZP experience.I remember talking to GregF and sifting through the endless well of knowledge that was the Official Greg Discussion. I remember his strange Lego tycoon game or whatever and all the additions to the canon that came from fan contests. I specifically remember being away from internet access during the 500 Years Untold contest and lying awake wondering how I was doing in the polls (it was a huge relief winning that).I remember liaising with the marketing team at Papercutz, the guys who made the Bionicle Graphic Novels, to get my video down to a good length for their contest. That felt really exciting because that's probably the most I've ever won in a contest and it was recognition from people outside the fandom that my work had value.I remember Dark 709's crazy movie projects. I couldn't tell you anything that happened in it, but I can tell you it's still probably the biggest thing ever made on this site. I actually forgot Tohkann's Re-Birth Chronicles and the part I played in them until they showed up in my YouTube feed one day.I remember Vahki Power and Kim Power and all the other crazy pranks the staff pulled. I particularly remember being very confused when they gave all the staff random women's names.I remember discovering a secret code in the image URLs of the Premier Rank images, and then everyone telling me I had too much time on my hands (I'm starting to think they were right)I remember making a pirate-theme emoticon and feeling so special when Ninjo just decided to plop it in his signature for fun.I remember finding out that Bionicle was ending and being sad that a major part of my life was ending, but at peace as well. I didn't really have time for the sets any more and I was glad that we got a significant amount of closure for the story (not counting the web serials). It was just a weird feeling; like finishing a very long book and having to carry on with real life.I remember finding out that Bionicle was coming back and eventually deciding to come back to BZP myself, and ending up spending most of my time trolling through the blogs.I remember this topic where Black Six asked people what their favourite BZPower memories wereAll in all, it has been one wild ride. There have been highs and lows, friendships made and lost, and countless lessons learned. I gained technical expertise in multiple areas, a killer typing speed, and the opportunity to experiment creatively and be rewarded for my efforts. And if I could do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing. (Although maybe I'd have stuck to Harry Potter instead. Better chance of getting a girlfriend in that fandom.)

Except most companies would prefer you didn't read their terms and conditions.

I'm glad I can come to this blog to find out who all the cute boys are.

Chapter 7- Episode 2: Trials of the Toa (Part 2) (The Creatures lead the Toa to a cliff at the edge of the island.) Pohatu: Why bring us all the way up here? Gali: That's why! (She points to an island in the distance.) Pohatu: Wow, we're going to Voya Nui already? Gali: It's obviously not Voya Nui. Pohatu: Gang's on the loose, nothing you can do! Gali: You are the worst sort of person. Lewa: I know that place. Kopaka: You've been there? Pohatu: Duh, we all have! Remember when Brutaka captured us? Gali: IT'S NOT VOYA NUI! Lewa: I've had visions. (Lewa dashes off towards the island.) Tahu: So, are we just going to ignore that? I mean, that's a pretty serious mental health concern, right? (The other Toa and Creatures dash off after Lewa.) Tahu: I... okay, fine. Let's just let someone with the power to make trees kill us all have unchecked psychotic breaks. What could go wrong? (The Toa all race towards the island.) Onua: Coming through! (He knocks over a tree.) Lewa: Whoa, hey! This is an optional race! You don't have to destroy the ecosystem to win! How would you like it if I just started beating up your element? Onua: Sure, go for it. (Lewa kicks a patch of dirt.) Onua: OKAY, STOP! ANYTHING BUT MY PRECIOUS EARTH. Lewa: Yeah, that's what I thought. (Tahu jumps through a bush and the other Creatures and Toa join him.) Tahu: Ha ha! I win! Gali: Oh, were you racing? Onua: Because if you were, you lost. Tahu: Are you kidding? I beat all of you! Onua: When you're done arguing, take a look at that, out there. Lewa: How did you win anyway? I had a pretty big head start and I had home field advantage. Tahu: Well ya got me, by all accounts it doesn't make sense. (The Toa direct their attention to the island.) Tahu: There's something on that island. Pohatu: The Mask of Life? Gali: No. Onua: It looks like a crater. Pohatu: Mount Valmai, perhaps? Gali: If you mention Voya Nui one more time, I will actually drown you. Kopaka: That must be where we're going. Pohatu: Why am I not surprised? Tahu: Because we literally just did this? What was the point of the last scene if we're just doing it again a little bit closer? Kopaka: Hey, anyone else notice that giant head sticking out of the beach? Pohatu: YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! CURSE YOU! MATA NUI CURSE YOU ALL TO KARZAHNI! Gali: While not technically Voya Nui, Karzahni does appear in the 2006 storyline a few times. IT'S DROWNIN' TIME! Pohatu: (The Creatures start to chatter and skitter about.) Pohatu: What's with them? Lewa: Now they want to race. Kopaka: You mean unified? Tahu: You mean we're repeating the race scene too?! Kopaka: I think that's just for emergencies. Gali: You afraid you'll get in trouble? Kopaka: Hey, don't mess with the Unity police. They'll make you work together and talk about the importance of friendship! Tahu: It'll be good practice. Lewa: Yeah! I need some practice beating you! Tahu: ... in that you are currently unable to??? Lewa: Last one to the island's got a big tin mask! Tahu: Maybe he should practice talking smack, first... (Lewa and Uxar unite and fly off to the island.) Tahu: Ha ha ha ha ha! Okay! ... Weird, this script has me do a lot of laughing... And I'm wearing red. Am... am I Santa? Gali: Let's go! (Gali jumps off the cliff with her Creature. She dives in the water and surface, speeding through the water.) Gali: Yeah! (Kopaka races after her, freezing the ocean beneath him as he speeds towards the island. He traps Gali in ice as he speeds past her.) Kopaka: See you! Gali: Ice... is... still... water! (She smashes the ice around her back at Kopaka, knocking him towards Lewa. Kopaka grabs Lewa's leg before he can hit the water.) Kopaka: Um, excuse me? Since when can you turn ice into water? What is this? Avatar?! Gali: Well I am blue... Kopaka: The other Avatar. (Lewa notices Kopaka hanging on.) Lewa: Hey! Kopaka: Mind if I hitch a ride? Lewa: Sure, but no checked baggage please. Kopaka: That's alright, I'll just put it in the overhead compartment. Lewa: ...... that was not a compartment. (Ketar hisses at Pohatu.) Pohatu: My feelings exactly. See you on the other side. (Pohatu uses his power to skip a stone across the water as he rides it.) Ketar: Doesn't he know that hissing is how scorpions say "I love you?" Onua: Wow, really? Ketar: Ha, no. I was just going to take the opportunity to kill him when everyone was distracted. Onua: Well why didn't you say so? Then I can control both Earth and Stone! Come on! (He creates a bridge of earth to the island and beckons Ketar to follow. Meanwhile, Gali begins to surf, but Kopaka drops down on her, freezing her wave and skating off.) Gali: My wave! Kopaka: If you can't beat 'em, join 'em! Gali: That's the one liner you're going with? How about "wave goodbye"? You see, it's got two meanings because-- Kopaka: Wave goodbye! Gali: (Pohatu skips along on his stone, knocking Kopaka into the water.) Pohatu: Wipeout! Kopaka: No, you're supposed to say "wave goodbye". Gali: (Up ahead, Lewa causes what the descriptive audio calls "vines" but it quite obviously seaweed to grow tall to ensnare Tahu, but Tahu slices through it with fire because OF COURSE HE DID WHAT DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN, LEWA?! Anyway, somehow even though Tahu and Lewa were clearly in the lead, Kopaka and Gali make it to the beach first, followed by Lewa, Pohatu, and lastly Tahu.) Tahu: Man, for all the races in this episode, it's really weird how inconsistent they are. Like did they even do any animation continuity in this part? Director: Uh... deleted scenes? Tahu: Oh please, since when have the Bionicle movies left out crucial storyline information? (Onua is last to arrive on his bridge of earth.) Tahu: Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Looks like you lose. Onua: Maybe, but look what I found. Kopaka: Is it the plot? Because I don't think we've had very much of that this episode... (Onua gestures to Ketar. Everyone looks at Pohatu.) Gali: You left him behind? Pohatu: No, we just took different paths. Ketar: Honestly guys, I'm not complaining. Pohatu crossed the sea on a rock. I do not regret going the sensible way. Lewa: Well get over it. We're gonna need you both together. Gali: Hey, weren't you doing a weird speech thing in the last part? Lewa: Uh... windfly sandtwister? Gali: Yeah, no. Pohatu: Don't worry, if you need him and me to... "do that thing", we will. But I'm not going to carry a scorpion on my back just 'cause you guys wanna play some little game. Director: Pohatu is the most rational character in this show? Did I pick up the wrong script??? Kopaka: As long as you're there when we need you. Pohatu: Well do you need me right now? Kopaka: Well, no, but -- Pohatu: k bye Kopaka: Tahu: Okay, let's go find this mask! (The Toa leave the beach and walk up the crater, totally ignoring the giant statue of Pohatu's head. They gaze upon the crater.) Lewa: Wow, look at that! Kopaka: Yeah, this is one big crater. Onua: No, that. (He points to a giant maze that takes up most of the crater.) Lewa: How did you possibly miss that? Of course I was talking about the giant maze! Kopaka: Look, Lesovikk. In this generation I just have the Mask of Ice. I don't have the vision powers I did in Generation 1. Lewa: Well I didn't see that coming. Pohatu: Hold on. Is that where we're going? Kopaka: Sure. It's where they hid Makuta's mask. Pohatu: No, I mean. Wasn't a big maze part of the storyline that killed Bionicle the last time? Kopaka: Yeah, but what are the chances of that happening again? (Everyone leaps down into the crater and they come to an entrance to the labyrinth. Which is amazingly coincidental since that thing takes up like the whole island, and also COMPLETELY INSANE BECAUSE THEY WERE ALL ABLE TO FLY IN LITERALLY THE LAST SCENE. WHY DIDN'T THEY SPEND TIME EXPLAINING WHY THEY CAN'T CHEAT THE LABYRINTH INSTEAD OF DOING TWO RACE SEQUENCES?! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!) Gali: This is unbelievable. (I KNOW!) Director: Okay people, let's patch up the fourth wall a bit and continue the scene. Kopaka: Who made this? Lewa: I don't know, but look at this writing. Pohatu: Does it say how to get in? Lewa: You know, I think it does. But how do I know that? Pohatu: I... what? IT'S CALLED READING! Gali: There's so much we don't know about our past. Pohatu: LIKE WHAT READING IS?! Gali: Maybe whoever built this maze has something to do with us. Onua: Or we have something to do with them. Gali: Shut up, Onua. That's exactly what I just said. (Lewa reads the inscription.) Lewa: Toa, challenges, Toa touch... Someone touch the door! Tahu: Why don't you touch the door? You're like a millimetre away from doing so anyway! Lewa: But it's so far! Can't you do it? Tahu: You're the worst. (Tahu puts his hand on the door, and it starts to glow and then opens.) Kopaka: Let the Creatures lead, they've been here before. Pohatu: Right! They know where we're going! Mellum: Um yeah, but we were last here like thousands of years ago. Why would you assume we'd remember an impenetrable maze after all this time? Kopaka: Shut up, Nuju. I just watched Indiana Jones last night. If you think I'm going first, you're nuts. (The Toa turn to the Creatures, but they back away.) Onua: I think they want us to go first. (Tahu steps forward.) Lewa: Be my guest. Tahu: If you break into song, I will barbecue you. (The Toa and the Creatures enter and the door slams shut behind them.) Gali: It's beautiful. Pohatu: What? It's just a maze. Gali: It's a-maze-ing! Pohatu: Tahu, can we barbecue her instead? (The Toa notice light shining into a doorway.) Tahu: The light! All we have to do is follow it! (The Toa run into the next room only to be confronted by giant sliding cubes.) Gali: The walls are moving! Lewa: Oh my gosh... we're in a Zelda game! AND I'M WEARING THE PERFECT OUTFIT! Kopaka: Hold on! Tahu: To what? The moving walls? Kopaka: Obviously, Lhikan. They're like those moving sidewalks in airports. Tahu: What kind of airports do you go to?! Pohatu: Now what? Tahu: Look out! Kopaka: Oh, it's stopping! Pohatu: Finally! (The Toa race across a bridge formed by the blocks.) Lewa: Wait, guys! You have to use the Pegasus Boots! (At the end of the bridge, two large blocks start to close together.) Lewa: It's closing up. Run! (Onua holds the two blocks apart as the other Toa run through. Pohatu and Ketar are the last ones there.) Pohatu: Let me help. Onua: No, go. You'll need to pull me out. On three. One, two... (Pohatu pulls him out and they both crash heavily into the wall. Onua looks at Pohatu.) Pohatu: What? I didn't feel like waiting. Onua: Pohatu: Also I wasn't really sure where 3 was in the alphabet anyway.

I'm very disappointed that they didn't get an actual doctor for the role. Whatever happened to diversity in film and television? How will young doctors grow up to become successful members of society without positive role models to look up to?

Lo did the people of the Internet turn away from the dispersed hosting of images, turning instead towards the Houses of Social Media. The Book of Faces, the Gram of Insta, and the Gur of Im. These false prophets did draw the people away from the light, leading to the Fourth Dark Age of the Internet.

Faster than a speeding woman, more powerful than a hot day, able to scale tall cliffs in a single bound. Look, up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's your dad!

Murkrow is also another Gen 2 Pokémon that can only be found in Kanto. Personally, I don't think I'll be getting these VC games. HGSS were so good that if I wanted to do another Johto adventure, I'd just replay one of them.

That's the original Skull Slicer and his dog. Obviously.

We've had one Independence Day, yes, but what about Second Independence Day?