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EXTERMINATION: Review


Voltex

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That RvB reference... I saw it.

 

I'm not seeing any references in the chapter??

 

“Three Matoran died!” Taka Nuvia hissed.

 

“Yeah, and three more will probably die tomorrow!” ToaD retaliated. “Seriously, what don’t you get about that?”

 

Two of our guys are dead!

 

And two more will probably die tomorrow! Seriously, what don't you get about that?"

Edited by Strange Festive Luroka

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That RvB reference... I saw it.

 

I'm not seeing any references in the chapter??

 

“Three Matoran died!” Taka Nuvia hissed.

 

“Yeah, and three more will probably die tomorrow!” ToaD retaliated. “Seriously, what don’t you get about that?”

 

Two of our guys are dead!

 

And two more will probably die tomorrow! Seriously, what don't you get about that?"

 

 

Ah, now I see it. To be fair, though, that's just the kind of person ToaD's character is.

He don't care about anybody

 

*reads chapter 3*

 

Well, look at that. I'm still alive, ha ha.

 

*gloats*

 

...

 

:D

 

 

 

 

(sorry sorry sorry I just couldn't resist making a comment like that)

 

Your character is finally getting his time to shine, after only a single scene in Book 1 and what essentially amounted to two cameo appearances in Book 2. 

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I felt that the airship scene was a little rushed. The strained relationship between JiMing and Shadowhawk was introduced, and I liked it, but before I could really get a good feel for it at all, it was most definitely gone. Sometimes abruptness can be good but here it doesn't work, IMO.

Voltex's return is similarly rushed, I think. He shows up, they talk for probably two minutes, then he insists on immediately teleporting to the... uh... yeah, teleporting. (No spoilers.)

Those are just my issues with the chapter, and outside of those things it was fantastic as per usual. This story is immensely enjoyable so far.

  • Upvote 3

save not only their lives


d665fa5c17bc200a946e0a69eaf11f929dc080cb


but their spirits

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I felt that the airship scene was a little rushed. The strained relationship between JiMing and Shadowhawk was introduced, and I liked it, but before I could really get a good feel for it at all, it was most definitely gone. Sometimes abruptness can be good but here it doesn't work, IMO.

Voltex's return is similarly rushed, I think. He shows up, they talk for probably two minutes, then he insists on immediately teleporting to the... uh... yeah, teleporting. (No spoilers.)

Those are just my issues with the chapter, and outside of those things it was fantastic as per usual. This story is immensely enjoyable so far.

 

The scene at the end with Voltex is rushed intentionally - he has probably spent close to thirty minutes back at base with Fighty already, and at this point in time he just wants to escape from everything without hanging around. Do the other characters allow him to leave a little to easily? Perhaps. There is a reason for that.

 

That said, you're correct about the JiMing scene; that's something that I should have expanded upon or built up to more.

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I don't recall JiMing having much of a role in Book 2 right off the top of my head...also I thought Shadowhawk was killed in Book 1. Great, now I have headache. :P

 

Anyway, I'm still alive, so that's all I ever needed to know. Yet. Two awesome chapters in a row - keep it up. 

 

Both characters were discovered to have been extremely close to death at the very end of Book 2 and were, as such, easily revived (compared to characters that were actually, well, dead)

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Wow...I...wow...this suspense....ah.... so many people died...

 

 

For all I know I'm dead already...I should've watched for the sniper shot...

 

If a main cast member dies (ie. anybody who signed up to be a character), they're dying onscreen. It's one of the few things that I can guarantee everyone.

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Just saying that I've been a bit busy lately and didn't get a chance to fully read through each chapter before. I'm aaaaalmost done with finals, so brace with me here. xP

But I like what I'm reading so far! I'm honestly a bit flattered to see myself as a narrator, and I like what's going on too! Maybe I'll have more complete thoughts when I catch up, but yeah. xP

Haven't seen one of these in a long time...

 

 

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I knew JiMing survived. :) (For now, anyways. :P)

 

That was another great chapter. I'm very interested in seeing what the White Council member is up to with Agent 64 and the others. I'm also interested in the story taking place in the Red Star. Though me being a part of that part of the story may have something to do with that. :P

Everyone is one choice away from being the bad guy in another person's story.


 


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Just saying that I've been a bit busy lately and didn't get a chance to fully read through each chapter before. I'm aaaaalmost done with finals, so brace with me here. xP

 

But I like what I'm reading so far! I'm honestly a bit flattered to see myself as a narrator, and I like what's going on too! Maybe I'll have more complete thoughts when I catch up, but yeah. xP

 

I hope you can catch up soon! I think you'll enjoy it.

 

I knew JiMing survived. :) (For now, anyways. :P)

 

That was another great chapter. I'm very interested in seeing what the White Council member is up to with Agent 64 and the others. I'm also interested in the story taking place in the Red Star. Though me being a part of that part of the story may have something to do with that. :P

 

You're actually the only new character that starts off on the Red Star (versus the Triplets, who appear briefly before showing up there). 

 

Wait... I burned down a base?!!

 

I wonder what White Seven is up to... hehehe, his soooo cute! :)

 

White Seven was one of my favorite characters to write for, which is really a shame. But he did turn out rather unique and the group he's leading right now provides what is probably the only real comic relief that the epic has.

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I like White Seven a lot, which is saying something because White Council and all, so props there. (Ehks doesn't count)

 

also i may or may not be doing some recording of some lines from the series

All are not the same


But three shall be as one


Freedom in the flame


The end has just begun

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I like White Seven a lot, which is saying something because White Council and all, so props there. (Ehks doesn't count)

 

also i may or may not be doing some recording of some lines from the series

 

Ehks kinda counts

I mean

He is technically a member

 

We should audio narrate these.

 

Only if every single member can voice their own character

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Voltex frowned, but merely punched Cyrix in the face and sent him sprawling before running after them. 

i cri

 

A little disappointed that there wasn't a full battle with the Triplets- not necessarily because my character is a part of them, but because we've set them up to be these super-powerful and skilled assassins and the first time they really get a spotlight, the fight is averted. Although I totally understand if you want to save a full-on encounter with them for a bit later on. Regardless, I'm pretty stoked to see where the Red Star story will go! I also really enjoyed the fight scenes, especially the short one between Agent 64 and the Vahki; they were very well described and pretty intense.

[Cyrix]

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Just got caught up on the last couple of chapters; really liking this! And yay, my character is back and alive and doing something cool.

 

-Letagi

 

Letagi is one of those characters that just seems to keep popping up everywhere.

 

 

Voltex frowned, but merely punched Cyrix in the face and sent him sprawling before running after them. 

i cri

 

A little disappointed that there wasn't a full battle with the Triplets- not necessarily because my character is a part of them, but because we've set them up to be these super-powerful and skilled assassins and the first time they really get a spotlight, the fight is averted. Although I totally understand if you want to save a full-on encounter with them for a bit later on. Regardless, I'm pretty stoked to see where the Red Star story will go! I also really enjoyed the fight scenes, especially the short one between Agent 64 and the Vahki; they were very well described and pretty intense.

 

 

If I made it an actual fight, the Triplets would have won. Hence why it wasn't really a fight :P

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I knew JiMing survived. :) (For now, anyways. :P)

 

That was another great chapter. I'm very interested in seeing what the White Council member is up to with Agent 64 and the others. I'm also interested in the story taking place in the Red Star. Though me being a part of that part of the story may have something to do with that. :P

 

You're actually the only new character that starts off on the Red Star (versus the Triplets, who appear briefly before showing up there). .

That makes me even more excited for the coming story in the Red Star. :)

 

 

We should audio narrate these.

I would be so willing to do this with my character if I had the technology to do so, which I don't. :P

 

But my will is there, if that counts.

Everyone is one choice away from being the bad guy in another person's story.


 


pc0lX6T.png

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I have a phone recorder that's not TOO muddled when I speak in a closet.... I could maybe narrate. xP But expect a deeeeep deep voice. =P
 

Anyways, woah. This... Know what, lemme gather my thoughts. I can't think straight right now to give a proper explanation on how this is awesome. xP Just keep being Voltex, I guess is all I can say. =P

Haven't seen one of these in a long time...

 

 

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Just got caught up on the last couple of chapters; really liking this! And yay, my character is back and alive and doing something cool.

 

-Letagi

 

Letagi is one of those characters that just seems to keep popping up everywhere.

 

 

Sounds good to me. Question - does Letagi know Tavahka's true identity? Agent 64 is probably on the verge of figuring out who he is, which would make White Seven the only one in the group who really doesn't know. Unless he does know and is keeping quiet about it for some reason, of course.

 

-Letagi

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Voltex frowned, but merely punched Cyrix in the face and sent him sprawling before running after them. 

i cri

 

A little disappointed that there wasn't a full battle with the Triplets- not necessarily because my character is a part of them, but because we've set them up to be these super-powerful and skilled assassins and the first time they really get a spotlight, the fight is averted. Although I totally understand if you want to save a full-on encounter with them for a bit later on. Regardless, I'm pretty stoked to see where the Red Star story will go! I also really enjoyed the fight scenes, especially the short one between Agent 64 and the Vahki; they were very well described and pretty intense.

 

 

If I made it an actual fight, the Triplets would have won. Hence why it wasn't really a fight :P

 

Thaaaaat is a fair point, haha. Also I get the feeling that White Seven knows Tavahka's identity, but has something up his sleeve for him (or maybe he just doesn't care? He seems like a bit of an unpredictable character).

[Cyrix]

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How did Voltex end up on the Red Star?

 

See Blade's reply below.

 

 

 

I knew JiMing survived. :) (For now, anyways. :P)

 

That was another great chapter. I'm very interested in seeing what the White Council member is up to with Agent 64 and the others. I'm also interested in the story taking place in the Red Star. Though me being a part of that part of the story may have something to do with that. :P

 

You're actually the only new character that starts off on the Red Star (versus the Triplets, who appear briefly before showing up there). .

That makes me even more excited for the coming story in the Red Star. :)

 

 

We should audio narrate these.

I would be so willing to do this with my character if I had the technology to do so, which I don't. :P

 

But my will is there, if that counts.

 

 

Audio narration is an admittedly cool idea

Man

Spinoffs, parodies, fan art, crossovers, and now audio narration have all been discussed (and in some cases already released) with regards to Extermination xD

 

 

How did Voltex end up on the Red Star?

He teleported up there seemingly, with that device from last chapter.

 

 

Precisely.

 

I have a phone recorder that's not TOO muddled when I speak in a closet.... I could maybe narrate. xP But expect a deeeeep deep voice. =P

 

Anyways, woah. This... Know what, lemme gather my thoughts. I can't think straight right now to give a proper explanation on how this is awesome. xP Just keep being Voltex, I guess is all I can say. =P

 

For some reason I feel like you just finished reading Chapter 2.

 

 

 

Just got caught up on the last couple of chapters; really liking this! And yay, my character is back and alive and doing something cool.

 

-Letagi

 

Letagi is one of those characters that just seems to keep popping up everywhere.

 

 

Sounds good to me. Question - does Letagi know Tavahka's true identity? Agent 64 is probably on the verge of figuring out who he is, which would make White Seven the only one in the group who really doesn't know. Unless he does know and is keeping quiet about it for some reason, of course.

 

-Letagi

 

 

Letagi knows, yes. If a character is a named member of the Rebellion, that's information that they would know.

 

Thaaaaat is a fair point, haha. Also I get the feeling that White Seven knows Tavahka's identity, but has something up his sleeve for him (or maybe he just doesn't care? He seems like a bit of an unpredictable character).

 

White Seven is definitely unpredictable. The only thing certain about him is that he's loyal to the White Council. 

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I'm linking this now so I don't forget it, but I did some rambling into a microphone and read some stuff from Isolation, and it's gonna show up on this blog here over the next few days at noon EST.

  • Upvote 1

All are not the same


But three shall be as one


Freedom in the flame


The end has just begun

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We should audio narrate these.

 

Only if every single member can voice their own character

 

*ponders possibility*

*remembers her horrible accent*

*shudders*

 

C:

 

However, in all seriousness, that would be an amazing project.

 

~

 

And chapter 4 was great, BTW. I knew JiMing would survive. =P By now everyone's kinda suspicious, though. Everyone.

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I'm linking this now so I don't forget it, but I did some rambling into a microphone and read some stuff from Isolation, and it's gonna show up on this blog here over the next few days at noon EST.

 

Coolcool will be waiting

 

 

 

We should audio narrate these.

 

Only if every single member can voice their own character

 

*ponders possibility*

*remembers her horrible accent*

*shudders*

 

C:

 

However, in all seriousness, that would be an amazing project.

 

~

 

And chapter 4 was great, BTW. I knew JiMing would survive. =P By now everyone's kinda suspicious, though. Everyone.

 

 

I think everybody knew JiMing was still alive... even I wouldn't kill two narrators two chapters in a row.

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The first reading should actually be up now, if you want to hear my stupid voice mangling a reading of voltron's role in uprising.

 

"of course Voltex has to get the special role"

:P

There's actually a story reason behind it! =D

 

 

The first reading should actually be up now, if you want to hear my stupid voice mangling a reading of voltron's role in uprising.

Well that inspires me to record something. Later though.

 

 

I do not have recording equipment

boo

#struggleisreal

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