SPIRIT

Daylight Saving Time is unrelated to the Gregorian Calendar, making this a separate issue. I shall take this opportunity, however, to formerly announce my Anti-Daylight Saving Time Agenda. I hope that this has renewed your faith in the SPIRIT International Hegemony.

I'm sure they'll find the course... illuminating.

I've remained silent on this issue for far too long, but I can do so no longer. While playing Fallout 4 and looking at an Achievement Guide, it was brought to my attention that some of the Achievements are mutually-exclusive to a playthrough unless you save-scum. Not only that, but other achievements are locked behind moral choices, but only if you pick a certain choice! That's not how Achievements should work! Achievements should follow these rules: 1) A player must not be able to lock him or herself out of obtaining an Achievement. By the time you reach the end of the game, you should be allowed the option to return to all instances where an Achievement could have been obtained in order to reach 100% game completion. The obvious exception to this rule is games that are designed for multiple playthroughs. 2) No Achievement should require the action of another human to complete. It can certainly be an option, maybe in a game with online capabilities that someone could help you get an Achievement, but that can't be the only way. Humans are unreliable and untrustworthy and making others rely on them to get Achievements is only going to result in pain. 3) No more than 50% of a game's Achievements should be obtainable as part of completing the main story. No one cares about those ones! It's not "oh no, I had to work so hard to follow the neon signs down the path that the developers painstakingly designed for the lowest common denominator, I'm so glad I was rewarded for this", it's usually "oh... a consolation prize... yay..." It cheapens the Achievement brand, and it's just insulting. Sure, it can be handy to know how far you are in a game, sort of like announcing chapters in a book. However, you could just do what Half Life 1 did in the days before Achievements and just, you know, tell the player that they've advanced to the next part of the game? The only reason I could possibly see for not banning these (with the exception of an Achievement for completing the main storyline) would be so that you can check how far your friend has advanced through a game so that you can avoid spoiling what is to come next. 4) No hidden or vague Achievements. I shouldn't have to look up a guide to find out what I have to do for an Achievement let alone what the Achievement is. If they're hidden to avoid spoilers, find a way to write the description of what you have to do a different way. If this is hard, try hiring better writers. 5) If an Achievement requires the player to complete an action a certain number of times, there MUST be a visible counter to help the player track his or her progress. This is pretty self-explanatory. I should have to mentally tally how many times I do something or just keep doing something until I get the Achievement popup. The game is already counting for me. Why can't it just show its work? Lots of games already do this, it needs to be standard. I propose that the governments of the world sign an agreement to make a Ministry of Achievements (or Department of Achievements depending on your government's terminology) that regulates all games their country publishes. Not only will this governing body work to ensure that the 5 Commandments of Achievements are followed, but they will also work to ensure that Achievements are challenging but not impossible. Hopefully this will permit the art-form to flourish and will prevent unscrupulous game developers from releasing substandard video games. Please remember SPIRIT's 5 Commandments of Achievements the next time you're voting. Thank you.

Similarity is not sameness. While we have much in common, on a very fundamental level we have some key differences. There’s more than maple leaves that makes us the true north strong and free.

I really liked the Mountain Police one. Is there an explanation in the lore for why there’s so much crime in the mountains to necessitate a dedicated police force? If not, please invent one for the purposes of this blog.

Chapter 12- Episode 4: The Dark Portal (Part 1) (The Toa walk through a rainy valley of stones. Pohatu kneels to the ground to examine a set of footprints.) Pohatu: There, I knew it. This is where Umarak entered the Region of Stone. Ekimu: Good, we need to reach the crater before he can open the portal. Pohatu: And we've got a long way to go. Tahu: Wait, if we already know where Umarak is going, why are we wasting time tracking him? Surely we should just go to the GIANT, IMPOSSIBLE TO MISS CRATER INSTEAD OF WASTING TIME TALKING ABOUT WHAT THE AUDIENCE ALREADY KNOWS. Gali: Hey now, this is a serial Netflix series. What if the audience forgot what happened? Tahu: Both these episodes were released on the same day. WHAT WAS THERE TO FORGET?! Gali: Well, Tahu, unlike you some people have better things to do than watch Netflix all day long. Tahu: ........ I'll just shut up now. Lewa: If Makuta had to open a door to another world, why couldn't he do it someplace nice, like the jungle? Ekimu: Oh, I'm sorry you don't think the former site of the greatest city in our culture is "someplace nice". Lewa: I'll just shut up now. Ekimu: Makuta doesn't have the power to open the door to the Shadow Realm. Kopaka: Right, because first he needs to get the Seven Millennium-- Ekimu: It was the Forbidden Mask. Pohatu: Hold on, are we giving up on calling it the "Mask of Ultimate Power"? Because "the Forbidden Mask" is only slightly better. Ekimu: Actually, its full name is the Forbidden Mask of Ultimate Power. Pohatu: HOW DID YOU FIND A WAY TO MAKE ITS NAME WORSE?! Kopaka: So you destroyed the mask. Ekimu: It destroyed itself. The merged elements cannot remain as one, and when they split apart... Onua: It tears a hole between our worlds. Gali: So Umarak can't release Makuta. Ekimu: Unless he's found pieces of the Forbidden Mask. Lewa: Which you know he has. Tahu: So, what do you say we pick up the pace? (The Toa run off through the rain.) Tahu: By the way, thanks for wasting a whole two minutes of my life recapping everything we already knew... and then acknowledging that we already knew the stuff we already knew. I think the audience's hands are getting sweaty for how much we've been holding them through this story. Director: Look, everyone was always complaining that the movies didn't make sense. Now you're complaining that they're too easy to follow? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?! Tahu: I DON'T KNOW! THIS IS THE INTERNET! PEOPLE JUST COMPLAIN ABOUT STUFF! (Agil perches atop a stone spire and Pohatu stops the group in front of him.) Pohatu: Whoa! Tahu: Why are you stopping? Pohatu: I think he wanted me to wait. Ekimu: Agil! (Agil flies down to Ekimu and lands on his arm.) Ekimu: He wanted to make sure we were together. Pohatu: But... we've been together this entire episode... WHAT'S THE POINT OF THIS SCENE?! It's almost like they're padding things out in this episode for some strange reason... Well, I'm sure that just means Bionicle Generation 2 will have a long and healthy lifespan. Director: Okay, you just keep believing that. Lewa: So are we there? Pohatu: We are. Look. (He points at a giant mountain of purple crystal with a purple beam of energy at its peak.) Lewa: Wow, how did I miss that? Does Gen 2 Lewa have incredibly poor eyesight? Is this a new depth to my character? Pohatu: No, I think you're just stupid. Lewa: (The Toa all gaze at the mountain.) Tahu: That looks bad. Lewa: You can say that again! Tahu: Oh great, now Lewa's going deaf too! Ekimu: It is sad how evil my brother has become. Gali: I thought Makuta was always evil. Ekimu: No, he was jealous and ambitious. But I suppose that is where evil begins... with ambition. Kopaka: Remember kids, don't have any ambitions! It means you're evil! Ekimu: Hey, how about you let me tell my story first? How about that? Tahu: Oh good, the story that we already had at the beginning of the show... and a million times in 2015. This is such a great use of the final episode of this series. Gali: Hey guys, did you know that I'm actually the star of this episode? Ekimu: Hey cram it, Gali, and let me tell Makuta's origin story for the billionth time. (The scene fades to Ekimu as a Protector, gazing out over a vibrant city. Present day Ekimu narrates the tale.) Ekimu: The masks we made shaped the lives of those who wore them, but I never realized how badly my brother longed to outshine me. So Makuta broke our most fundamental laws-- Kopaka: And didn't file his taxes on time! Ekimu: No. Why would that possibly be what I'm talking about? Kopaka: Hey man, taxes are an important part of any civilized society. With taxes you can-- Ekimu: Okay, anyway. He merged the elements into masks. (In the flashback, Ekimu walks in on Makuta forging and red and green mask.) Makuta: I call it... the Mask of Christmas! Ekimu: What does it do? Makuta: It encourages people to spend more on gifts, allowing us to use the sales tax we collect to revitalize infrastructure! Kopaka: I told you taxes were important! Ekimu: Okay stop, we already didn't like you before. Making "likes taxes" your defining character trait really doesn't help you here. Kopaka: But they help redistribute the wealth. Ekimu: ANYWAY. Makuta hoped by making miracles, Okoto would see that he was more than just a simple mask maker. (Makuta gives a purple and blue mask to a villager who is canonically known as "the groundskeeper".) Bingzak: Haha! You don't get a real name! Groundskeeper: Well at least my name isn't Bingzak! Bingzak: (Using the power of the combined mask, the groundskeeper causes those weird giant raspberries from an earlier episode to grow on some bushes.) Ekimu: But combining even two elements in a single mask brought disaster. (The groundskeeper puts on the red and green mask, but the bush catches on fire. He quickly takes off the mask and gives it back to Makuta.) Gali: Hmm, kinda seems like just using the mask that grows more food would've been fine. What was evil about that? Ekimu: And wreck the economy by having affordable food for all? Are you nuts?! Gali: But wouldn't that solve world hunger? Ekimu: Exactly! See? Makuta was totally evil! (Makuta returns to his forge and pours molten metal into the cast for a new mask.) Ekimu: So hungry was my brother for power that he merged all the elements into one forbidden mask. He took his new mask to the capital. Makuta hoped the power of his new mask would allow him to rule the planet like a god. Tahu: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Bionicle has gods now? The internet is not going to like this one. Ekimu: I said he would be like a god, which may or may not indicate that there are gods in our system of beliefs. I think that's ambiguous enough to keep the internet happy. Tahu: You clearly don't know the internet. (Makuta stands in front of a massive crowd holding the Forbidden Mask of Ultimate Power.) Ekimu: But I knew it would not be so. Prophecy had foretold it all. Pohatu: So there was a prophecy that Makuta would make a dangerous mask and cause a rift in space-time that would transport the capital city to a parallel universe? Ekimu: Yeah, for obvious reasons we usually ignored those prophecies... Pohatu: Fair point. What other sorts of unbelievable prophecies were out there? Ekimu: Well, they also foretold the plot of The Last Jedi. That was pretty unbelievable. Pohatu: This is a weird island. (Ekimu runs towards Makuta as he puts on the mask.) Ekimu: If my brother had been pure of heart, the power might have affected him differently. Onua: What does the mask do if a good person wears it? Ekimu: Cures heartburn. Onua: Honestly, given the direction mask powers have been going since 2007, that doesn't really surprise me in the slightest. (The mask transforms Makuta into a giant.) Ekimu: But the mask's powerful alchemy turned my brother's envy and bitterness into pure evil. I did what I had to do. (Using his hammer, Ekimu smashes the mask off of Makuta's face.) Ekimu: The power of the mask tore a hole between our world and the Shadow Realm. (The mask explodes, sending shockwaves across the city.) Ekimu: The city was drawn into that world and so was my brother. (The city disappears, leaving behind the Black Crater.) Ekimu: Then it was gone and our world was as you found it, as it is now. Lewa: So wait, how did you just end up in a coma? And why didn't you die after all that time? You've just retold the same story we already knew with no real explanations of anything. Ekimu: That, Lewa, is the power of eating your vegetables. Lewa: ... I'm beginning to think your story is made up. (The flashback ends and the Toa stand around Ekimu in the train.) Ekimu: What is saddest of all is that it was all foretold in prophecy, from my brother's beginnings to our standing here. Pohatu: You know how this is going to end? ... Also, the prophecy specifically talks about you standing around and explaining your backstory to us? What a lame prophecy! Ekimu: I know what is written. Whether it will come to pass depends on you. Pohatu: So wait, someone wrote down the whole story of Bionicle Generation 2 and it exists in-universe? WHY WERE WE TRYING TO SOLVE MYSTERIES ALL THIS TIME IF YOU ALREADY KNOWS WHAT HAPPENS? Ekimu: I uh... Oh boy, we'd better go stop Umarak! (Ekimu runs off and the Toa follow him. The group stops as they see Umarak.) Kopaka: There he is! Tahu: Yeah, no duh! He's neon yellow on a purple background. How could we possibly miss him? Kopaka: I just wanted to be useful for a change. Tahu: Yeah, me too. (Umarak holds out his clawed hands and purple spires of crystal emerge from the ground.) Lewa: He's huge. Are those...? Ekimu: Pieces of the Forbidden Mask, yes. Onua: Then why hasn't he opened the portal yet? Pohatu: The mask has been dormant for a thousand years. The pieces will need time. Onua: Hey, you can't just make up lore like that! Also hasn't the mask been dormant for thousands of years? Pohatu: What do I know? I'm just making it up! Onua: I guess I walked into that one. Tahu: If we can sneak up on him, this should be easy. Lewa: It's never easy! Why does anyone even say that? Tahu: We have the element of surprise on our side. All we have to do -- (Umarak jumps out next to them.) Umarak: Toa! Lewa: Surprise. Tahu: Very funny. (The Toa run off.) Tahu: How did he sneak up on us? He's like ten feet tall. Do we all just have really poor eyesight? Pohatu: Guys, I think we're ALL just really stupid. Director: Ding ding ding! Tell him what's he's won, Johnny! (Umarak raises his claws, drawing up pillars of elements from the ground.) Umarak: Beasts of all the elements, rise! (Elemental Beasts appear around Umarak and begin to march towards the Toa.) Onua: Okay, we've done this before. Gali: We've fought creatures with elemental powers that are defeated by destroying their masks? I don't know, that sounds like a pretty original concept... Onua: THAT IS LITERALLY THE ONLY THING WE DO! (Ekimu attacks a Storm Beast only to be knocked down and rescued by Agil and Kopaka.) Onua: Kopaka! Help! Kopaka: At last! I finally get my chance to shine in this series! I'm sure no one else will show me up in the next 30 seconds. (The Toa work together to fight the Beasts as Umarak makes his escape. Gali notices him running away.) Gali: We gotta go! Onua: Easy for you to say. (The Toa continue struggle against the Elemental Beasts.) Pohatu: ENOUGH! (Pohatu leaps up to a rocky outcropping overlooking the battle.) Pohatu: I am Toa Pohatu, Uniter of Stone! Look around you! This is my house! (A cyclone surrounds Pohatu as he starts to petrify. Then he punches the ground and destroys all the Beasts in one single strike.) Tahu: Why didn't you do that right away? Pohatu: I wasn't mad enough. Tahu: I thought you were always mad. Director: ... did we just do a canon meme... IN BIONICLE?!?? Tahu: I didn't meme to! Director: YOU ARE LITERALLY THE WORST! (Lewa points to a gap in the cliffs.) Lewa: Ah, look. Pohatu made us a path. How thoughtful. Pohatu: Yeah, right. Tahu: As long as we can call on the elements, we can beat this guy. Lewa: Just don't tell me it'll be easy. Tahu: What if I told you it'll be a piece of cake? Or easy as pie? Director: PIE?!??! Tahu: Uh oh.

Oh I forgot to mention we're doing 24 hour clocks everywhere now. Problem solved.

The sacred texts!

Pope Gregory XIII was a doofus as was Julius Caesar. Did they not foresee the importance of a logical calendar in a technological society? Here are some changes I would make if given supreme dictatorial power over the Free World. 1) New calendar starts the day after the winter solstice (i.e. the winter solstice is the last day of the year). The days start off short, get long, and once they're short again we start a new year. I could compromise by going with the summer solstice or one of the equinoxes, but the current system of "ehhh, I guess we'll start the new year like a week and a half after the solstice" is stupid and dumb and I hate it. 2) 12 months, 30 days each. Months 1, 3, 6, 9, and 12 all get an extra day. That adds up to 365. 3) No leap years. The final day of the year will be 0.2422 days longer to help the rotation and the revolution counts catch up to each other. 4) Better month names. September, October, November, and December are months 9, 10, 11, and 12 just so that we could fit in two holidays named after emperors who have been dead for like 2000 years? That's insane. Nope, scrap the whole system. Pick some new naming scheme. Name them after stars, rocks, trees, historical figures, elements, or dinosaurs. The current system has no cohesion or logic. 5) Now that there's no shift in which day falls on which date, all holidays are static and better spaced out. Every month gets a holiday and they all happen either on a Monday or a Friday. None of this "oh, sometimes it lands on a Wednesday". That's not a lottery I'm interested in gambling at. Now I realize many religious and cultural celebrations may follow a lunar calendar or that certain groups may be attached to celebrations that are already tied to specific days. Well tough tamales! You should've thought of that before electing me supreme leader of the world. I think that's a pretty good start, and it's pretty easy to fit a 5 step plan into my manifesto. I could go into detail on my plans for a 3 day weekend, second Christmas, or regulations about which holidays warrant fireworks and which ones do not, but I think I can save that for the supreme world leader election circuit.

Have you tried the Wayback Machine? There might be some remnant of your stories still floating around. And welcome back! It's always nice to see a familiar username resurface from the mists of the past.

Ah Christmas 2003. Good times...

>Sell your house >Get the virtual reality one >Live wherever you want

I'm just waiting for a spy movie or something where they discover the criminals have been communicating via LEGO Loco postcards. Untraceable, perfectly encrypted, it's the last thing the cops would suspect.

Or maybe Rey can be a strong independent woman who don't need no man!

Welcome back, Atlas. Please resume your duty of holding up the world. Things have been getting weird in your absence.

Chapter 11- Episode 3: Destroyer's Game (Part 3) (Tahu rescues Kopaka from a group of Lava Beasts.) Kopaka: Thanks! Wait, is that all of them? Tahu: You sound disappointed. Kopaka: These things are like $15 each. I was kind of hoping they'd have a bigger role in all this... Perditus: Could be worse... could be so much worse... (Melum and Ikir jump off their backs and rush back to the city.) Kopaka: Hey! Tahu: Where are they going? Kopaka: I don't know, but I bet it's important. Come on! Tahu: If this show has taught me anything, now that you and I are involved, it's definitely not important. (The Toa and their Creatures meet up in the city.) Tahu: You know there are more of those things coming. Onua: And they are growing more powerful. Tahu: Shut up, Onua. There's been nothing shown to suggest that. You're just saying stupid clichés for dramatic effect! Onua: Uh oh, we've got company! There's a storm coming! This time, it's personal! Tahu: Kopaka: So what are we doing? Onua: It is not our job to stay and fight them. Kopaka: Yes it is! Uh... isn't it? Pohatu: I thought we were pest exterminators who also fought spooky skeletons? Ekimu: Onua is right. We are needed elsewhere. Lewa: We're going to the Khajiit homeland of Elsweyr in the land of Tamriel? Ekimu: Why would you assume I meant the obscure video game location instead of the normal English word? Lewa: I might have a slight video game addiction... Oh hey, there's a Swinub nearby on Pokémon Go. Gimme a sec.... Gimme a sec... Ekimu: (The group notices Ekimu's new appearance.) Tahu: Whoa! Pohatu: For once we agree! Whoa! Tahu: You mean you usually don't agree with me? Lewa: You've been busy! (Agil flies down and lands on Ekimu's arm.) Onua: I have. Ekimu: Wha-- shut up, Onua! That's obviously my line! Onua: Sorry, it was the Netflix subtitles! I can't believe they got us mixed up! Our voices are completely different! Director: Uh... Ekimu: The time for mask making is over. Now I join the fight. Tahu: When did it begin? I mean, you made our Unity masks, but we had to go out and find new ones because yours were so terrible. Not to mention the armour modifications that took away Lewa's ability to fly. You're kinda really awful at your job, you know? Ekimu: Yeah, well, at least I didn't have to turn fighting spiders into an epic quest. Tahu: Gali: The hawk is beautiful! Ekimu: And powerful. He is Agil, the Creature of Light. Our forge was built on the foundations of his ancient temple. Tahu: And not by chance, I bet. Ekimu: Not by chance. Agil: YOU BUILT A FORGE ON TOP OF MY HOME ON PURPOSE?! ALL THESE YEARS I ASSUMED IT WAS A MISTAKE! WHEN THIS IS OVER I'M GONNA-- Gali: So you are the Toa of Light. Ekimu: No, just an old Mask Maker who'd like to help. Also I think the Director would have an aneurysm if we brought Takanuva back. Pohatu: Yeah, right. Kopaka: What a weird thing to say. Pohatu: The writers wanted to make sure I had enough lines in the show. Kopaka: WELL GOOD, IT SURE WOULD BE A SHAME IF THE WRITERS NEGLECTED SOME OF US. Ekimu: Now, we must leave. Tahu: What about the city? Onua: This whole attack was designed to keep us from our real task. Gali: Umarak... Lewa: And all the time we've been here, the Hunter has been on the move. Gali: He must know a way to release Makuta. Pohatu: I've faced Umarak before and so has Lewa. You guys stay here and protect the city. We'll take care of him. Lewa: Wow, a Lewa-Pohatu team up? We haven't done that since 2008. This is going to be so -- Ekimu: Umarak wears Makuta's mask. There's no telling how powerful he will be. Lewa: You mean the mask that controls your mind if you wear it? Oh no, how awful. Onua: We must face him together. Lewa: But what about the never-before-seen team up? Onua: Oh I'm sure we'll have looooooooads of time for that. A whole decade of Gen 2 Bionicle to do it in. Director: Uhh...... Tahu: But what will become of the city? Ekimu: The city is in good hands. The Creatures will stay. Kopaka: Ah yes, we'll leave the city in the hands of the things that specifically do not have hands. A cunning ploy. Tahu: And the Creatures will fight without us? Lewa: Sure they will! (A group of Storm Beasts appears over the ridge. Terak knocks them down and a group of villagers rushes up and starts punching them. Their masks fall off and another villager smashes them.) Storm Beast: Ow, stop punching us! We're already dead! Water Okotan: Storm Beast: Well at least he isn't using that creepy spanking emoticon... Tahu: Look at Ikir! (Ikir breathes fire at some Storm Beasts, vaporizing their water while Akida shatters them with twin water jets.) Akida: Okay, for the record, I definitely contributed a lot more than Ikir did. Where's my recognition? Ikir: Oh can it, you stupid flying fish. Akida: Wow, that is insensitive on multiple levels. (Ketar knocks another group of Storm Beasts off the ridge to the waiting fists of the villagers below.) Ice Okotan: Storm Beast: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Lewa: Haha, they do just fine without us! Tahu: I guess they do... Onua: Don't sound so disappointed. We still love you, Tahu. Tahu: Okay, well I was disappointed. Now I'm just creeped out. Ekimu: We must go. (The Toa, Ekimu, and Agil assemble outside the city.) Gali: Where to? Ekimu: I don't know, but Agil does. He has seen Umarak. Onua: So he told you that he saw Umarak, but not where he saw him? That bird has some sass. Ekimu: Tell me about it! Agil: Ekimu: The element of light brings vision. Look into Agil's eyes and he will share what he has seen. (Agil spreads his wings and the Toa are shown a vision of Umarak the Destroyer reaching into a pit of lava. He grabs a golden shard of metal and examines it.) Umarak: That is the last. (Umarak puts the piece into a purple and black box. Agil briefly attacks Umarak but flies off when Umarak resists him. The vision fades away...) Tahu: What was that thing? Ekimu: That is what Umarak has become. He belongs to my brother now. Pohatu: Oh, okay. In complete contrast to when he was an ancient evil born from the shadows at the dawn of time. This is somehow drastically worse. Gali: What what was that he found? Ekimu: I-- YOU-- WHAT?! WHAT DO YOU THINK IT WAS?! WE'VE DONE LIKE 3 EPISODES ABOUT HOW HE'S TRYING TO FIND THE PIECES OF MAKUTA'S MASK! WHAT DID YOU THINK IT WAS? A RANDOM ROCK FOR HIS ROCK COLLECTION OR A RANDOM PIECE OF TRASH THAT HE'S PICKING UP FOR THE JOY OF IMPROVING THE ENVIRONMENT?! YOU MIGHT BE THE STUPIDEST PERSON TO EVER EXIST IN ALL OF BIONICLE, AND I'M INCLUDING BOTH VEZON AND GAARDUS! Gali: (The Director applauds gently before wiping a small tear from his eye.) Ekimu: Okay, SO for anyone else who's not following this series of events -- It was a piece of Makuta's forbidden mask. We must hurry. Tahu: You know where he's going? Ekimu: The Black Crater. Pohatu: I know that place. There's nothing there. Ekimu: It was once the site of the greatest city on the island. Gali: Is that where you knocked the mask off Makuta? Ekimu: And created an opening between our world and the Shadow Realm. Tahu: Alright everybody, grab your Duel Disks. This is going to be one heck of a crossover series. Gali: So the city was destroyed. Ekimu: Destroyed in our world, but trapped forever in the Shadow Realm. Gali: Okay so why didn't you just say it got sent to the Shadow Realm? Who's teh stupidest Barnicle now? Ekimu: ... Onua: And all that's left is the Black Crater... (Meanwhile, as the Toa stand around discussing lore while the fate of the world is very much at stake, Umarak approaches a pool of purple liquid. He raises a clawed hand and the pool begins to bubble and rise up. Dark clouds circle overhead and a vertical beam of light rises in the eye of the storm.) Tahu: What is that? Ekimu: That is the door to the Shadow Realm. We have run out of time. Tahu: Well cool, I guess we'll just continue to stand here and talk. That'll be our contribution to all this.

Elemental creatures? Now where have we seen those before...

We had them but they teleported away.

I also need someone with a tan body, but for slightly different reasons...

Hi. I miss you too.

WHAT YEAR IS IT?

Jolly? I’d say you look a little blue.

That's Mr. Dr. Professor Akano to you!