NickonAquaMagna Posted January 3, 2016 Author Share Posted January 3, 2016 New sets- I mean, new characters! I hope they leave a heck of an impression. 1 Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Specter Knight Posted January 3, 2016 Share Posted January 3, 2016 YEAH! NOVA ORBIS IS BACK! (Well, only partially, but still) I love the Medieval knight aesthetic you've got going on. The heavy shadows are very reminiscent of the Old Piraka teasers in '06. Can't wait to learn more about these guys! Quote (I'll do this eventually, I swear...) My BZPRPG Characters Corpus Rahkshi Characters: Kol Arsenal Swarm Amalgamation Skyrise Characters: Zavon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evil_jaga_genius Posted January 3, 2016 Share Posted January 3, 2016 Toa Hunters, huh?... sounds familiar... "We came to Metru Nui for our favorite sport: Toa hunting." ANYWAY. I like the old medieval look--and, apparently, they're Toa hunters. They look like they're these holy crusader-type knights, seeking to rid the world of the plague of Toa... I'm getting ahead of myself, aren't I. Here's a preview of tomorrow's chapter. I REEEEEALLY like how the closeup of Calor turned out. Everything he ever knew or thought he knew about being a Toa, the very ideas of what that means, just went down the toilet. And keep in mind, this so far in the future, it's a world where people have forgotten all about the likes of Tuyet and Nidhiki, so it's not like there's a precedent for the atrocities Piras has just committed. So yeah... Calor is understandably afraid. And sad.It seems like they're going to be getting a taste of Nidhiki's Dark Hunter side, too... Quote Avatar by Nicholas Anderson (NickonAquaMagna)My blog: The Jaga's Nest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geardirector Posted January 4, 2016 Share Posted January 4, 2016 Okay, so, after a veeeeery long absence, I'm back, and I've caught up with the story so far. I have to say, I'm genuinely impressed, and I think most of that just comes from the fact that, more than anything else, I enjoyed reading this. Just to clarify, I basically stopped reading just before the first story was starting to get serious, with Ahkmou, Calor and Silva trapped in a cave while Imber, Mieli and Uira were hours away. So with that said. I really have to say that this was a very impressive effort, the Toa Novus all got a chance to grow, the story moved several big paces ahead, and plenty of backstory and just, everything growing bigger and badder, all in all, it's pretty glorious. I could just point to specific things I like and disliked, but I just have a general bunch of observations to share: The first thing that struck me throughout the series 1 finale and series 2, is that Calor seems to be segueing in Hahli's role with the Toa Mahri, in which she became more independent and slowly starting seeming a bit more like the proper "leader" of the team over Jaller. Maybe it's just because seems to be imitating Akhmou's habit of occasionally striking out on his own, but at two crucial moments he was either the last man standing or the one rushing ahead. I question the use of Ahkmou's Rau as a way to detect deception, though. That greatly stretches the definition of what a "language" is. I mean, that's the way we got an X-Man who became a master Martial Artist through Body Language and a master Hacker through Programming Language, somehow (not to mention the ability to see structural weaknesses in a building because architecture something something language). Moreover, would he really need the help of a mask for that anyway, when he's already pretty good at picking up on those things? With that said, when Ahkmou is actually using the Rau in a believable way, it's a pretty good show of his own pretty intelligent mind working behind that imposing behemoth he is now. I have a suspicion about what species Voima is, but in the interest of avoiding a possible spoiler I'll not say outright. I'm really starting to get mixed feelings for the Turaga. Not even Taipu or Kopeke are willing to be completely straight with the Toa Novus, and it was those two I figured would do so when the time came, and meanwhile Vesta just managed to somewhat redeem himself in spectacular fashion. I was interested to learn that Vesta's career as a Toa was rumored to be unsually short, and I think it explains a good bit about him, maybe he felt like he didn't quite deserve to become a Turaga that quickly, that there was still something he hadn't accomplished? It seems likely that Attra and, perhaps, Zyvyz who still hasn't shown up, are going to emerge from the sidelines to help out at some point.. The thought actually scares me a little, that a Toa of Magnetism and a Toa Gravity would pair up, with those powers put together, something very, very big could go down. I strongly suspect that what Imber might need to learn next is how her actions might have consequences she didn't prepare for, if only because I do think she wants to be the Standard just as much as other people want to see her that way. The revelation of the 'Seers' and 'Watchers' was a big punch in the gut, I see, and I like how it actually gives Uira a personal reason for fitting into the archetype of the free-spirited dreamer rather than "that's just the type of person she is". Silva certainly got a character development upgrade in series 2, especially with his understanding of his own powers. Meeting Susurri was... interesting and fun, mainly because I've toyed with basically the same idea of a De-Matoran hermit who keeps a small group of dangerous predators as companions in some unforgiving wasteland, but even then, the thing about his partial deafness is a very interesting touch that I certainly haven't seen before. There are many clues given to the nature of the outside world, most of which aren't very promising. The Dummy Masks, the old Mechanicle caches, the underground ruins Tenius came across. Something went horribly wrong, indeed and the outside world still carries scars of it, perhaps, while the new generation of Matoran have been raised in complete ignorance of these events. I just feel bad for Sein, who seems like he's the only Toa Miro with his senses still his own. To have his people's future so violently cast down right in front of them, Piras should probably watch his back in the future. The addition of Piras' Mask of Charisma looking like a different one to throw people off is another detail I like. It seems like the kind of trick you'd expect a people who wear powered Masks to think of pretty quickly. I really liked the design of the Toa Miro Kaita, even if they look pretty ridiculous to the point of being a pair of Anime Mecha. And that's all I had. I'm glad you continued to work on this, Nick, and I enjoyed it a lot. I'm glad to be back in time for what comes next. Quote BZPRPG Profiles Nuparu-Ferron-Mar-Zelvin-Wiremu-Farzan-Mako-Krex-Tamachan-??? Akiri Nuparu Posts: 1. 2. ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petewa Posted January 4, 2016 Share Posted January 4, 2016 New sets- I mean, new characters! I hope they leave a heck of an impression.Knights templar. 1 Quote Mataru Nui, an Interactive Adventure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted January 4, 2016 Author Share Posted January 4, 2016 "I question the use of Ahkmou's Rau as a way to detect deception, though. That greatly stretches the definition of what a "language" is. I mean, that's the way we got an X-Man who became a master Martial Artist through Body Language and a master Hacker through Programming Language, somehow (not to mention the ability to see structural weaknesses in a building because architecture something something language). Moreover, would he really need the help of a mask for that anyway, when he's already pretty good at picking up on those things?" Was he using the mask that way, though? I intended for him to be vague about it, like he was using the mask as a metaphor and has just gotten really good at telling when people are lying. 2 Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axilus Prime Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 Ok, those look really freakin' cool. Except maybe that weird beak on the black one. That doesn't look right. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 Ok, those look really freakin' cool. Except maybe that weird beak on the black one. That doesn't look right. There are medieval helms that look like that. In this one's case, it's supposed to look like a drill nose... because of course the earth counterpart would have a drill for a nose. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Volatile Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 (edited) Ok, those look really freakin' cool. Except maybe that weird beak on the black one. That doesn't look right. There are medieval helms that look like that. In this one's case, it's supposed to look like a drill nose... because of course the earth counterpart would have a drill for a nose. I think what he means is that it doesn't look Bionicle enough Edited January 5, 2016 by Toa Aeron Quote Just because you're trash doesn't mean you can't do great things. It's called garbage can, not garbage cannot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 Ok, those look really freakin' cool. Except maybe that weird beak on the black one. That doesn't look right. There are medieval helms that look like that. In this one's case, it's supposed to look like a drill nose... because of course the earth counterpart would have a drill for a nose. I think what he means is that it doesn't look Bionicle enough Well, uh... all right then. Not sure what I can do that would make it more Bionicle-like, but the armor will have more or less the same feel that the Toa Miro's updates have. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axilus Prime Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 No, no, that's not what I meant at all. I think your Bionicle has evolved its own artstyle and I like it. I'm not in any way saying "it doesn't look Bionicle enough." I did not know that some medieval helms look like that and now I see your reasoning. I still think it looks really goofy though. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evil_jaga_genius Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 For some reason I keep coming back to this story for ideas while I'm writing my own. Especially the duel with Ahkmou and the Kaita. I'm not sure why. Quote Avatar by Nicholas Anderson (NickonAquaMagna)My blog: The Jaga's Nest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted January 27, 2016 Author Share Posted January 27, 2016 I'm flattered. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted February 5, 2016 Author Share Posted February 5, 2016 I'm getting ready to start writing the next story. First, though... I know that somewhere in the earlier stories, I had one instance of a character making a "peace" sign with their fingers and it meant something different. Doesn't anyone remember which scene that was? I don't want to mess up continuity somehow. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Click Posted February 5, 2016 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Wasn't that when Calor and Uira first met at the... concert... thing? Uira gave him the peace sign? Quote ~ Corpus Rahkshi: Fang | Hoto | Tube | Tear | Canvas | Garrotte | Reda BZPRPG: Azusai | Mitsuri The Scarabax Library | Flickr | Deviantart Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted February 6, 2016 Author Share Posted February 6, 2016 Nah, she was just pointing at him that time... I think it was somewhere around the middle of year one's story. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iver Posted February 6, 2016 Share Posted February 6, 2016 I believe it was when Ahkmou was travelling to meet Albus with a wounded Gemma. I believe it was a symbol for emergency treatment. It's been too long since I was able to catch up with this. Quote "You humans are absurd, Rook. Furious when you're not in control, terrified when you are. Pull it together." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted February 6, 2016 Author Share Posted February 6, 2016 I believe it was when Ahkmou was travelling to meet Albus with a wounded Gemma. I believe it was a symbol for emergency treatment. It's been too long since I was able to catch up with this. Ah, thank you. I thought it must be something like that, I just had no idea where or when. This will help with future developments. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iver Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 (edited) To clarify, it was chapter 4, and was described as "the Matoran's universal sign for "urgency."" Edited February 8, 2016 by Jovan2 Quote "You humans are absurd, Rook. Furious when you're not in control, terrified when you are. Pull it together." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 10, 2016 Author Share Posted March 10, 2016 I think it's time we got up close and personal with one of the Venators. This is Leedvermaak, one of the Venators, the Knights of Caelum. He wields a mace and Kanohi Doloribus, the mask of pain. He's the brown set. Well, not set, but... you know. We can pretend this is legit. That's it for now. I hope he's made an impression. 4 Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onaku Posted March 11, 2016 Share Posted March 11, 2016 Well'p, here we are again. The hype once more kindled... Quote BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evil_jaga_genius Posted March 11, 2016 Share Posted March 11, 2016 *gets run over by the hype train* Quote Avatar by Nicholas Anderson (NickonAquaMagna)My blog: The Jaga's Nest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 12, 2016 Author Share Posted March 12, 2016 I've decided to tell some of the next story through journals that Voima finds while following the Toa Miro, while jotting some of her own notes down. So think of them like the journals you'd pick up in Amnesia- The Dark Descent that Daniel would read to himself. That should be cool. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evil_jaga_genius Posted March 13, 2016 Share Posted March 13, 2016 Yay Voima's back =) Would they be the Toa Novus' journals or the Matoran's journals, or maybe both? If so, I wonder how the Novus got enough willpower back from the dummy masks to write journals... they would definitely make for interesting reading. Quote Avatar by Nicholas Anderson (NickonAquaMagna)My blog: The Jaga's Nest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axilus Prime Posted March 14, 2016 Share Posted March 14, 2016 Pain, you say? You know, this song kinda fits the tone that picture is setting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 14, 2016 Author Share Posted March 14, 2016 Yay Voima's back =) Would they be the Toa Novus' journals or the Matoran's journals, or maybe both? If so, I wonder how the Novus got enough willpower back from the dummy masks to write journals... they would definitely make for interesting reading. These were written before they had the dummy masks. The logs Voima recovers from the Manibus belong to- VentiFerrumA Matoran named J'ohA Matoran named ScitisPirasand a mystery person. So far, I've written the first chapter. It's turning out great.Pain, you say? You know, this song kinda fits the tone that picture is setting. I'd say that kind of fits the Venators in general. They're some of the coldest Bionicle villains you'll have ever seen. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 17, 2016 Author Share Posted March 17, 2016 (edited) Behold, the red Venator... Traag. Hi-res version here. http://nickinamerica.deviantart.com/art/Bionicle-Nova-Orbis-Traag-Teaser-597218686 He wears Kanohi Tarda, the mask of sloth. It makes the target too sluggish to properly fight back, and can even cause them to lose consciousness if the battle drags on for long enough. His sword can also spew flames out of the edges of the blade.He's not even the leader, he's just the red one. The... sand red one. And dark red. Yeah, you can imagine how this guy may look as a set. He's also very tall. Even taller than most Toa. Edited March 18, 2016 by NickonAquaMagna 1 Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 28, 2016 Author Share Posted March 28, 2016 Introducing Te Veel, the black Venator.Well... more like a dark purplish color. I was thinking the beings beneath the Venator armor could have wildly different skin colors, like Te Veel's complexion could be an intense green, sort of harkening to the eye colors of characters like Onua. Anyway, Te Veel is part of a rare caste of "Super-Caelumians," gifted with insane strength, speed, and spacial awareness. They have virtually no body fat, and despite their bulk, are rather swift and speedy. Seeing one "let loose" in a warzone can be downright mesmerizing.She wears Kanohi Onero, the mask of mental overflow. It triggers the target's brain to fire on all cylinders, boosting their senses unbearably high and firing so many neurons that the afflicted becomes unable to fight and may even suffer a seizure. If used by the weak-minded, this mask can backfire and have this effect on the wearer. Te Veel's will and brainpower is sufficient to command this mask, unsurprisingly.So yeah... yet another very sinister mask-user. Feedback is appreciated. 2 Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evil_jaga_genius Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 Huh. I'm not sure if he's a powerhouse or a nimble fighter. Maybe a mix of both. Actually, considering his mask power, he could be devastating as a Toa of Psionics - using telekinesis to speed up his motions, or throw his axe and have it psychically home in on somebody... maybe it's the purple, I always associate purple with psychic powers, I guess from playing too much Pokemon =P Anyway, you haven't said whether or not the Venators are sticking to the conventional elements except for Traag using fire, so I guess they could have any powers. If any of the Venators KO the Toa Miro, my money's on this guy. Quote Avatar by Nicholas Anderson (NickonAquaMagna)My blog: The Jaga's Nest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 30, 2016 Author Share Posted March 30, 2016 Huh. I'm not sure if he's a powerhouse or a nimble fighter. Maybe a mix of both. Actually, considering his mask power, he could be devastating as a Toa of Psionics - using telekinesis to speed up his motions, or throw his axe and have it psychically home in on somebody... maybe it's the purple, I always associate purple with psychic powers, I guess from playing too much Pokemon =P Anyway, you haven't said whether or not the Venators are sticking to the conventional elements except for Traag using fire, so I guess they could have any powers. If any of the Venators KO the Toa Miro, my money's on this guy. She. Also, they only have some elemental weaponry. Freeze gas, electric nets, stuff like that. So far, I've written two chapters of the next story and have started working on the third. It's a complex mystery, but it's coming together. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evil_jaga_genius Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 She. Also, they only have some elemental weaponry. Freeze gas, electric nets, stuff like that. So far, I've written two chapters of the next story and have started working on the third. It's a complex mystery, but it's coming together.Oops. So she is. Random question, was Ultio's mech-suit anything like what the Venators are using? Quote Avatar by Nicholas Anderson (NickonAquaMagna)My blog: The Jaga's Nest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 30, 2016 Author Share Posted March 30, 2016 Liiiiittle bit. These are more modern and compact. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onaku Posted March 31, 2016 Share Posted March 31, 2016 So are they each more powerful than the Ultio suit? Quote BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted March 31, 2016 Author Share Posted March 31, 2016 So are they each more powerful than the Ultio suit? Not necessarily, but they are a bit more streamlined and efficient. Ultio basically stole his from some storage facility full of ancient artifacts. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clyce Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 Dang. The amount of time and effort that went into this and for the legend rather than money. That is a true story teller right there! Quote Gleaming glistens The Red Star, Bringing life to death afar, Up away in deepest space, You call me from your distant place. Proud member of the Kanohi Force (Disavowed, but never dead) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted April 24, 2016 Author Share Posted April 24, 2016 Here's an interesting find. Some weirdo used one of my Toa Unda drawings to sell t shirts on amazon. http://www.amazon.com/PingAnShu-Crew-Bionicle-Heroes-Shirt/dp/B0191JV5UY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1461521077&sr=8-1&keywords=bionicle+t+shirt 1 Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onaku Posted April 24, 2016 Share Posted April 24, 2016 Report that schmuck. Quote BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickonAquaMagna Posted April 24, 2016 Author Share Posted April 24, 2016 Report that schmuck. It may not be a shmuck, though. It looks like an entire Chinese company that just scours the internet for whatever assets they can find to print on t shirts. This is like that time the artist, Doxy, was accused of owning sweatshops because their art was appearing on love pillows, and they had to explain "I do not own a sweatshop. These people have stolen my artwork." It's kinda big. Quote The Toa- A Bionicle Retelling by NickonAquaMagna http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25275-the-toa-a-retelling-of-bionicle/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onaku Posted April 24, 2016 Share Posted April 24, 2016 Darn it. Sucks when something like this is too big to tackle... Quote BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Volatile Posted May 22, 2016 Share Posted May 22, 2016 (edited) "Bionicl Heroes 2: No "e"" confirmed Edited May 22, 2016 by Toa Aeron Quote Just because you're trash doesn't mean you can't do great things. It's called garbage can, not garbage cannot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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